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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28643910">Replay My Footsteps (on each stepping stone)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SyciaraLynx/pseuds/SyciaraLynx'>SyciaraLynx</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambassador Sokka (Avatar), Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Looks at Canon, M/M, Mythical Beings &amp; Creatures, Past Child Abuse, but what if I just, mute character, ripped that apart</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 06:08:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>61,507</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28643910</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SyciaraLynx/pseuds/SyciaraLynx</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I met Sokka when Aang arrived here to master fire bending, and we have been friends ever since.” Iroh laughed, “Though the plucky young boy I originally met is a far cry from the warrior he has become! Quite handsome as well,” Iroh winked at him.</p><p>Zuko felt like he was losing the will to live. </p><p>or</p><p>Iroh is stepping down from his seat on the council to retire, and has decided to choose his own replacement.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Suki/Yue (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>232</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>452</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Of Good Men and Politics</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Lordy, I do not know why but I have written this fic in reverse?! I started off with a 5000 word ending and had to leap frog backwards to get to here. Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>“I don't understand why we need to replace you in the first place, Uncle.” Zuko could hear his tone tilting closer to a whine, and sighed.</p><p> </p><p>“Zuko, I have been a bridge between the nations for the better part of fifteen years, and I think I have more than earned retirement from the council,” Iroh gently chastised. He set his tea set down in front of them, gazing out into the royal gardens. “I have personally chosen my replacement, and Ambassador Sokka is a dear friend of mine! He will do just fine in my stead.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko tried not to bristle at that, “He is a dear friend of yours that I have never met?”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh ignored his tone entirely. “He is a high ranking member of the Southern Water Tribe, as well as an esteemed war veteran. He spent many years as a teenager accompanying the Avatar during his training as well. I met him when Aang arrived here to master fire bending, and we have been friends ever since.” Iroh laughed, “Though the plucky young boy I originally met is a far cry from the warrior he has become! Quite handsome as well,” Iroh winked at him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt like he was losing the will to live. “<em>Uncle</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh waved a hand at him, “Yes, yes I know, you are 'uninterested in such things', but you have to admit it will be nice to have a younger face amid the council seats, no? At the very least Zuko please make an attempt at being civil? I will not be here to stop your inevitable rudeness.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sputtered indignantly, but laughed, “I'm sure even in Ba Sing Se you will be able to sense when I fail at social niceties, Uncle.”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh laughed as well, patting him gently on the arm, “We shall see in a few days, I am set to leave tomorrow after all.”</p><p> </p><p>That quieted Zuko. The thought of having to run this nation without his Uncle's patient guidance was unsettling. He felt like a ship that was about to be unmoored.</p><p> </p><p>He took a sip of tea.</p><p> </p><p>His Uncle gave him an knowing look. “Zuko, you have been Firelord for nearly a decade, you will do just fine without me. The other council members are not useless either, you will not be doing this alone.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded, letting his eyes focus on his tea while people milled about in the gardens around them. “I'm... I'm just going to miss you Uncle. It will not be the same without you around to drag me out for tea or Pai Sho.”</p><p> </p><p>He didn't say, <em>you are almost the last of my family still in the palace</em>, or,<em> I'm terrified of who I might become without you, </em>but he thought the sentiment was heard regardless.</p><p> </p><p>Iroh blew on his tea and gazed at him for a moment. “You know, I can personally attest that Ambassador Sokka is a formidable Pai Sho player.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Uncle</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“Do you know anything about the man Uncle is appointing, Suki?” His personal guard trailed slightly behind him, footfalls near-silent as always.</p><p> </p><p>“Ambassador Sokka?” She laughed lightly. “Actually I do, we were good friends as children.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko stopped in his tracks and turned to face her. “Are you serious? Does everyone know this man except for me?”</p><p> </p><p>Suki shoved him lightly to keep him walking. “Not for long, you will meet him tomorrow. If the weather permits at least.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed, “And what is your opinion of him?”</p><p> </p><p>Suki hummed. “Well, I have not seen him in person for a few years, but we remain friends to this day, so I would say I am a bit biased in his favour.” Suki paused for a moment, apparently gathering her thoughts. “Iroh is right, he is a formidable warrior, and strategist. He will certainly be an asset to you. He is... hard to dislike. He is unerringly kind to everyone. Too much so, sometimes. I think this will be good for him as well, in the long run.” She shrugged.</p><p> </p><p>“I'm sure I will put that kindness to the test at some point, you know I don't tend to make the best first impressions with people, you included.” Zuko muttered.</p><p> </p><p>“I came around, after a while.” Suki patted him on the shoulder as they rounded the corner to his chambers. “You will be fine. Sokka can have a rough exterior sometimes, but he is a puppy at heart, I promise.”</p><p> </p><p>“Do you also promise to rescue me when things inevitably go sideways?” Zuko fidgeted with loose strand of hair from his braid.</p><p> </p><p>Suki smirked knowingly, “Is the great Firelord Zuko <em>nervous</em>? Be still my heart I never thought I would see the day.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko narrowed his eyes at her. “I don't like you.”</p><p> </p><p>“Lies and slander! I'm your favourite.” Suki winked and turned around to start making her way back to her own home, having seen Zuko safely to his. “Goodnight Zuko.”</p><p> </p><p>“Goodnight Suki.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In the quiet of his room, he sat at his desk and pondered for a moment. He wanted an impartial opinion before he made his own judgements. Someone who had no previous affiliation and would not spare feelings on any side.</p><p> </p><p>He eyed his messenger hawk, perched dutifully beside the open balcony.</p><p> </p><p>“Here goes nothing.” He wrote a quick note and handed it to his bird. Quietly, he said, “take this to my sister.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In the morning, his bird was once again perched, sleeping. A small tight scroll tied to his ankle. Zuko was quietly pleased, sometimes Azula would choose not to write back. He gently removed the note, mindful of his tired pet, and unrolled the letter.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Z,</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>From what I understand of him, what Suki and Uncle said is true. He is known across nations for being skilled with both weapons and words. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I do know he abdicated his spot as the Chief of the South to his sister, but that is the only gossip of note. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I would call him trustworthy.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Let me know if I am ever wrong. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>A.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko frowned.<em> Trustworthy. From you that is practically a marriage proposal, Azula. Who is this guy?</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko stood and stretched. To no one he said, “I guess I will find out.”</p><p> </p><p>~</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>In this AU, Iroh challenged Ozai directly after the Agni Kai, and won. He stayed as Firelord temporarily until Zuko healed, and has been an advisor ever since.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Of Family and Farewells</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>Seeing Iroh off was a quiet event. He had already spoken to his closest friends, and there was just a select few who arrived early at the gates to say a final goodbye.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had spent all morning in low spirits, though he tried to hide it as best he could from his Uncle, who had been incredibly cheery throughout the process of packing his carriage. Which was a whole other story in and of itself, as it was teeming with trunks and bundles, and odd musical instruments. Zuko was certain that at least thirty percent of what it was carrying was <em>tea</em>.</p><p> </p><p>When at last he was ready, Iroh turned to him and Zuko found himself unable to say a word, as if there was too much to put into a sentence. Iroh just smiled and pulled him into his arms, the same way he would when he was small.</p><p> </p><p>“You are a great ruler Zuko. Your heart has seen to that already. I look forward to seeing what more you will do in my absence.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's breath caught as he pulled back and nodded. “Enjoy yourself Uncle, and... write to me?”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh clapped a hand on his shoulder. “As if I wouldn't! I may be moving away but I want to be kept up to date on all the gossip floating around.” He laughed and hoisted himself up into the carriage.</p><p> </p><p>With a final goodbye he set off, with the barest hints of dawn peeking through the clouds.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt a smaller hand thread his, and looked down to see his niece watching Iroh's carriage gain distance down the road.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi didn't look distraught, just solemn, but the hand in his gripped tightly as if worried he too would disappear if she let go. Zuko squeezed back. “My day is free until the afternoon today, is there anything you would like to do?”</p><p> </p><p>She turned to face him, and signed one-handed, <em>“Duck pond?”</em></p><p> </p><p>He smiled and signed back. <em>“Lead the way.”</em></p><p> </p><p>They wound their way back to the palace with only Suki accompanying them, and Zuko relished the quiet of the early morning.</p><p> </p><p>His niece was a peculiar thing. She was alike him in many ways, always seeking solitude, and aged much too quickly from terrible loss. She could always hear, but speech had never been her strong suit. Her words always seemed to get jumbled to the brink of gibberish when she tried.</p><p> </p><p>After her father died, she stopped trying at all.</p><p> </p><p>Some around the palace said they should double down on tutors, force her to speak, if she was ever to be of worth as a princess. Zuko and Iroh had elected to throw those people from the palace grounds.</p><p> </p><p>Instead they had tutored themselves to learn how to sign.</p><p> </p><p>He dreaded to think what would have happened if his own father had still been alive when she grew old enough to hear the impediment.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko blew out a breath and watched her crouch at the edge of the pool, letting the turtleducks get close to her before throwing some crumbs out into the water, he thought of how different she was to the ghost that she was after Lu Ten had died.</p><p> </p><p>She was an odd thing, even now. Sometimes she was every bit the stubborn, impetuous, fifteen year old she should be, and other times she seemed strange and other-worldy. Almost ancient. Back then, it was like watching a shell of a person walk the halls of the palace. It took a long time to bring a smile back to her face, even longer for it to reach her eyes, but everyone around her was determined to keep her from sinking any further into depression.</p><p> </p><p>They were alike in that regard as well.</p><p> </p><p>He loved her, endlessly. He had never felt the need to try and have children himself, but he was ferociously protective of her, and did his best to be there for her whenever she needed.</p><p> </p><p>She turned to him, brushing off her long robes. She met his eyes, gold on gold, and signed. “<em>The new councilman is coming today?”</em></p><p> </p><p>He nodded, speaking and signing at the same time, “Afternoon, probably. Would you like to meet him when he arrives?”</p><p> </p><p>She looked away, and worried at her lip for a moment. <em>“Not today. Maybe... maybe tomorrow? When there are less people around.”</em></p><p> </p><p>He smiled. “Whenever you want. It's up to you.” Zuko looked over at Suki, leaning against a half wall in the garden. “I have been told he is a very nice person.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki picked up on his open question, “He is, Princess. I don't doubt that he would love to meet you as well.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi still looked concerned so Zuko decided to change subjects.</p><p> </p><p>“Care to join me for breakfast? My stomach is about to announce itself.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi considered him for a moment, but took the offered out, and gave him a small smile. <em>“Without grandfather around we might be able to actually get a couple hotcakes for once.” </em></p><p> </p><p>He laughed and took her hand once more, starting to step up the path. “Don't count on it, Suki has been waiting for her chance to strike.”</p><p> </p><p>An indignant “Hey!” came from behind them, and Zuko broke into a jog, laughing and pulling his smiling niece along with him.</p><p> </p><p>~</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This chapter sent me down a spiral, and this was just supposed to be a snippet at the start of chapter 2 and turned itself into a WHOLE THING so I ended up splitting it into 2nd and 3rd. WOOF. </p><p>No beta we die like men, so, as always, please alert me to any spelling/grammar/tense errors.</p><p>In this verse, Izumi is Lu Ten's daughter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Of Introductions and Old Friends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~</p><p> </p><p>It was nearly twilight when an elegant ship sporting blue sails began to approach the docks. The evening watchmen were quick to guide it to port and set about securing it. The commotion could be herd from the seaside, and they knew the procession would reach the palace in short order.</p><p> </p><p>Suki was nearly bouncing beside him in excitement, anticipating the arrival of her friend. A few members of the council had come down to welcome the Ambassador as well, and were chatting energetically around them.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko himself felt as if he had swallowed a stone, his stomach knotted with nerves. He had a reputation for being... surly, sometimes when he first met someone. He had spent the afternoon rehearsing proper introductions in his head, as if it would help him.</p><p> </p><p>Despite his lack of social skills, he stood a little straighter when the murmuring around him quieted, and a small procession rounded the gates and walked up the stone path towards them.</p><p> </p><p>The small delegation accompanying Ambassador Sokka were all dressed to impress in lush blue silks and armour, but they did not hold his attention for more than a moment when he finally set eyes on him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko hated it when his Uncle was right.</p><p> </p><p><em>Handsome</em> didn't do him justice, Sokka was breathtaking. He was dark skin set on broad shoulders, with black bands of tattoos travelling down each toned arm. His hair was pulled up in a multitude of complex braids that fell neatly down his back. The warrior was dressed in a darker blue than his company, and the contrast made his blue-gray eyes look like storms.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko wasn't often set off balance by someone's aesthetic appeal; he had enough men and women trying to win their way into his bed on that alone; but the easy way Sokka hopped up the stone steps towards them, and the warmth of the smile on his face had Zuko's chest tightening even more with anxiety. It increased ten-fold when Sokka bowed neatly before him.</p><p> </p><p>Suki nudged him lightly in the ribs, already saving him from a blunder, and he cleared his throat.</p><p> </p><p>“Ambassador Sokka, of the Southern Water Tribe, the Fire Nation welcomes you.” He could feel his face start to heat and was quietly pleased that it was likely getting too dark to notice.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka straightened and smiled softly. “Firelord Zuko, it is an honour to meet you. I am pleased you agreed to this rather unorthodox arrangement. I know it is not common to have people from other nations join the council.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't help but smile in return, “You can thank Iroh for that, he insisted on choosing his own replacement.” At Sokka's puzzled look he continued, “not that I wouldn't have allowed it or anything! Just that I wouldn't have even known you were an option if not for him. And we did! Have other nations on the council I mean. A long time ago, before-” Zuko could see Councilman Azir stifle a laugh behind his hand to his left. He sighed, rubbing a hand down the back of his rapidly reddening neck, “Apologies Ambassador, I'm not terribly good at this. I'm sure you can see <em>why</em> I need so many advisors in the first place.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes glinted with amusement, “I think you are doing just fine, no need to apologize.” He nodded towards Suki. “Ask your sentinel sometime about the many ways I have embarrassed myself completely in front of dignitaries, I'm sure she would be more than happy to spread that knowledge.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki laughed, “It would be my pleasure.” She looked at Zuko. “Maybe it would be best to do proper introductions tomorrow? It is getting late, and I'm sure the Ambassador would like to be settled before nightfall.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko glanced a the other council members, who nodded in acquiescence and began to disperse. “Easily done. Will your men be staying for a while? I can easily provide some rooms for them if so.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka shook his head, “Thank you Lord Zuko, but no. They will stay on the ship tonight so they can leave at first light tomorrow. It is a long return trip and they need to return as quickly as possible to avoid the winter storms.”</p><p> </p><p>“Very well, I will send some of my men down tonight to fetch your belongings then.” Zuko gestured to the doors behind him. “I can show you to your rooms now if you wish?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka blinked at him in surprise. “I... I'm staying in the palace? Lord Zuko, that is far too generous. I would be perfectly happy sleeping in the barracks to be honest, there is no need for something so lavish for the likes of me.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko softened a bit at his obvious discomfort. Suki had warned him earlier that Sokka might not be keen on the idea. “It is not mandatory by any means. It was simply Uncle Iroh's wish that you take over his wing in his absence.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki raised an eyebrow, hand on her hip. “Come on Sokka, enjoy some luxury for once in your life. You would be doing me a favour anyway, Iroh left all of his bonsai trees here and demanded that someone care for them. I do <em>not</em> have a green thumb.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka scratched at the stubble on his cheek, and Zuko found the motion entirely too distracting. “I suppose I... well if you're sure? I really don't want to impose on you in your own home.” He met Zuko's gaze.</p><p> </p><p>“You won't, I promise. The palace is far too enormous as it is. It will feel too hollow with another empty wing.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's gentle smile returned, and he gestured forward. “Lead the way.”</p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>With Sokka settled, and Suki watching over the delivery of his belongings, Zuko made his way back to his own wing of the palace.</p><p> </p><p>The long day had taken a toll on him, and he was starting feel the soreness in his temples from eye strain. He took his hair down from the gold flame pin, which helped remove some of the pressure, but his scarred eye still throbbed.</p><p> </p><p>He looked at himself in the mirror as he wove his hair into a loose braid for the night. Even in the dim light of his bedroom, his scar was still stark against his pale skin. It was half the reason he hated introductions with people he had never met. They always wanted to know, always wanted to pity him.</p><p> </p><p>He felt somewhat relieved that Sokka hadn't seemed to bat an eye. Zuko wanted to believe that he hadn't been bothered by it, but the smaller, more cynical part of him, whispered that he had probably seen much worse as a soldier, so it just wasn't shocking.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko broke from his thoughts and sighed, there was no use obsessing over something he couldn't change.</p><p> </p><p>He laid his aching head down and finally gave out to his exhaustion.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Suki sat atop one of Sokka's newly delivered trunks, watching him gaze out at the city from his new balcony.</p><p> </p><p>She tapped a nonsense rhythm against her thigh, “So?”</p><p> </p><p>He turned towards her, eyebrow raised questioningly.</p><p> </p><p>She slid off and walked towards him. “Is it... is it the same as before?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka didn't answer, but he blew out his breath slowly and looked back out at the expanse, resting his arms against the railing.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh Sokka.” She rested a hand lightly on his arm, feeling the muscle clench and release under her touch. She followed his gaze to the lightly glowing city. “Iroh... he knew didn't he.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka hung his head, but nodded. “He always did. I think this was his way of... trying to right a wrong. But I don't know if- I just don't know.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki waited for anything further, but that was as much as he seemed willing to give her today. “You should know, Zuko was absolutely terrified to meet you.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka barked out a laugh. “I would tell him the feeling was mutual, but probably for very different reasons.”</p><p> </p><p>She conceded with a nod. “He is a good ruler. It was what made me stay on as his guard after my first contract was up. He puts everything he has into making his nation better, even at the cost of himself. He is like you in that respect, selfless to a fault. I think this will be good for you. And him.” She made her way over to his door, intent on leaving him to sort out his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you, Suki,” was whispered into the empty space as she softly shut the door behind her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In a bedroom down the hall from her Uncle, a princess began to dream of moonlight shining through snowfall.</p><p> </p><p>~</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Of Surprises and Support</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>The morning came with the same lingering headache from the night before. Zuko groaned as he hauled himself out of bed and blinked against the sunlight beginning to stream through his curtains. He massaged his temples and went about getting dressed, wincing every time he bent down as blood rushed to his throbbing skull.</p><p> </p><p>Today was going to be <em>a day.</em></p><p> </p><p>Ready as he could be, he walked quietly down the corridor to his niece's room. He tapped lightly on the door and heard shuffling inside before the latch sounded and Izumi's face appeared. She smiled and signed a quick,<em> “Morning, Uncle.”</em></p><p> </p><p>He smiled as well. She was always happier in the mornings, younger, when memories hadn't yet had enough time to invade her thoughts. “Good morning. Do you want to accompany me down for breakfast?”</p><p> </p><p>She paused, considering. <em>“Will the new Ambassador be there?”</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded. “I believe so, yes, but if you aren't comfortable meeting him today, I could have a meal sent up for you instead?”</p><p> </p><p>She thought on it a moment, but ultimately sighed. “<em>No, I will come down. I would rather meet him with you beside me, instead of accidentally running into him in the halls.” </em>She worried her lip for a moment. “<em>Does... does he know about me?”</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko could understand her anxiety, having similar reservations about meeting new people himself. <em>“</em>I'm not sure, but Suki may have mentioned it to him. He does not seem the type to judge you for it, from what I was told about him.”</p><p> </p><p>She still looked worried so he attempted a different tactic. “Would it help if I promised to kick his butt if he says anything rude to you?”</p><p> </p><p>She broke into a genuine smile at that. <em>“Arrogant to think you could, I think.</em>” She took a step forward, threading her arm in his and effectively cutting off his offended retort. <em>“Let's get this over with.”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>~~</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The Ambassador <em>was</em> there when they arrived, as was Suki. They were chatting, seated at the long table when Zuko and Izumi stepped through the entrance to the massive hall. He could feel her tense nervously against him, but she never stopped, striding purposefully with him towards the pair.</p><p> </p><p>Suki noticed them first, and waved. “Oh, thank the gods. I'm starving to death over here, because <em>this</em>,” she punched Sokka's shoulder lightly, “knucklehead, refused to eat until you arrived because he didn't want to be <em>rude</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka rubbed his shoulder, looking irritated. “I am not familiar with all the customs here, and it seemed a bit insulting to eat and dash without speaking to anyone.” His expression brightened as he looked towards them. “Good morning Lord Zuko, and you must be Princess Izumi?”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi loosened her hold on his arm and nodded, giving a small wave.</p><p> </p><p>Suki smiled at her obvious show of bravery, “Izumi, meet Sokka, Sokka, meet the princess.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi looked to her then, a determined look on her face, and lifted up a hand to sign “<em>S-o-c-k-a?”</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko saw the moment Sokka noticed and tensed himself for an explanation, but was cut short when the Ambassador lifted his own hand and signed back, speaking at the same time. “Not far off, Princess, but it's k-k, not c-k.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi sucked in a surprised breath beside him. <em>“You... you can understand me?” </em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned, continuing, “Signing was a useful skill to have in my line of work,” he explained. “Although I am decidedly out of practice, so you will have to go slowly for now if you want me to catch everything you say.” His hands followed his words for the most part, skipping some, but still easy enough to understand.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi was wide-eyed, but now the earlier nervousness in her expression had dissipated, replaced with obvious excitement.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko narrowly resisted the urge to throw himself across the table and hug Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>Instead, he cleared his throat. “Shall we order some food then? You are a braver man than I to deprive Suki of an early meal. Last time we were delayed at lunch due to work she threw a spear at a Governor's clerk.”</p><p> </p><p>“He spent almost two hours dragging out a deal about freaking wool supplies, and it was <em>lemon poached salmon day</em>.” Suki inspected her nails, “I would kill a man for less.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed, “Good to know you haven't changed at all.”</p><p> </p><p>With the tension broken, and food on its way, the conversation continued amiably. Izumi didn't add much to it, still fairly shook, but when she did Sokka gave her his undivided attention. He sometimes asked her to re-sign something, or asked Zuko or Suki to interpret a word he didn't know, but only if he couldn't work it out himself.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi finished her meal before them, bidding farewell to go and prepare for her lessons.</p><p> </p><p>Suki followed shortly after, having devoured her meal like starving beast. In the mornings she would accompany Izumi from the palace before returning to sort out the schedule for the day with Zuko.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stood and cleared his plate, preparing to leave as well. He likely wanted to check out the training grounds as he had inquired about their location during the meal. Zuko's hand shot out to stop him, snagging the sleeve of his shirt gently. “A moment, please?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sent him a questioning look, but turned to face him. Zuko was suddenly very aware of how close they were standing, he could even see the flecks of gray in Sokka's eyes. “Just... I just wanted to thank you. Others have not been so kind to her, and I want you to understand the scope of what you just did.” Zuko let his hand fall away. “It means a lot.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes widened. “Lord Zuko, I mean no insult to you, but you shouldn't thank me. That was the bare minimum of respect I could give. I wish I had known earlier, I could have brushed up on my skill before coming here, but it won't take me long to refresh my memory.” He frowned for a moment, voice coming out low. “Do people really treat her poorly because of it? It seems like a terrible reason to bully someone.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed heavily, “They have, in the past. I did my best to stop as much of it as I could, but meeting new people has always been something that makes her uneasy.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled. “Well, I for one, am happy to have met her." He cocked his head to the side and studied Zuko for a brief moment. "I hope you know it's no small thing to have family willing to go to bat for you, either. It's easy to see how much she loves you.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko looked away and fought the rise of heat crawling up the back of his neck once more. This man seemed to have an innate ability to fluster him more easily than anything he had ever experienced. He quickly steered the conversation to safer topics.</p><p> </p><p>“Anyways, if you are interested in attending something today, Suki will be back around midday with the briefings for the afternoon. No one would expect you to work on your first day here, but you are welcome to come and observe if you like?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded acquiescence. “Sure, I have no big plans other than the barracks this morning. I will aim to come back before noon.” He turned to leave again, but stopped for a moment at the doorway. “I meant what I said though. She is incredibly lucky to have you.”</p><p> </p><p>He left Zuko to the quiet of the empty hall, and the overwhelming volume of his own thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I did used to know a fair amount of sign language, as I used to teach riding lessons to children with disabilities, many of which included hearing impairment. </p><p>THAT BEING SAID I AM NOT AT ALL FLUENT, NOR DO I KNOW ANY OF THE INTRICATE PARTS OF THE LANGUAGE, so if I make any blunders please feel free to correct me, I will not be offended in any way.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Of Silver Tongues and Silver Linings</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Who boy, this took a bit longer than expected, this chapter is long one, strap in kids!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>When Zuko returned to his chambers he swiftly changed into his formal robes. He undid his standard braid and pulled his hair up into a neat top knot, sliding the gold flame piece on. He winced as his hair pulled taut. He had hoped that his earlier meal would've eased his headache somewhat, but as the morning wore on it had only worsened.</p><p> </p><p>He moved down the hall to his study, lighting a small lamp but keeping the curtains drawn to keep the brighter light out for the time being. He set out a few documents he needed for the day and attempted to scan through them quickly, though trying to focus on the words set the nerves along his scarred eye alight.</p><p> </p><p>When a sharp knock came at his door, he couldn't stop his flinch. Taking care to keep any indication of his predicament out of his voice, he bid them entry.</p><p> </p><p>Suki strode in with an armful of paperwork, Sokka trailing behind her.</p><p> </p><p>“Got good news and bad news Bossman.” She grimaced as she set the stack down on his desk.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko eyed her warily. “Okay? Care to share?” When he slid a look at Sokka, the water tribesman seemed to be just as confused as him. So this wasn't common knowledge yet at least.</p><p> </p><p>Suki huffed. “Good news, all of the meetings we were supposed to have today have been pushed till tomorrow.” She tapped the papers she had just set down.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had a terrible feeling about this. “And I would assume the reason for that is the 'bad news'?”</p><p> </p><p>“Correct! It is because the ever <em>respectable</em>, ex-commander-turned-governor Tu Lan has requested an audience.” The cheery sarcasm from his sentinel should've been his first clue.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko rested his aching head in his hands. “Fuck.” He cracked an eye open and glanced at Sokka. “Sorry.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed and waved him off. “Don't hold decorum on my account. Either of you care to share with the class? Who is Tu Lan?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Tu Lan controls a large portion of the nothern shipping ports, and profits heavily from pricing everything he imports at nearly a 500% markup. The people that do the actual seaside labour are barely paid enough to feed themselves.” Zuko rummaged through his desk to pull the poignant documents up, handing them to Sokka. “We have been attempting to integrate a wealth tax on the area that would feed back into the people, or at the very least add an increase to their pay, but Tu Lan is... challenging.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki sat heavily in one of the guest chairs. “Which is official Firelord speak for 'Governor Tu Lan is a stuck up old asshole who is hoarding money while many of his people go hungry, and ties up these meetings by arguing for days until people give to his wants out of sheer desperation.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded. “That is... more or less correct.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka looked up from the pages to meet his gaze. “And I take it you can't force him into either arrangement? You can't overrule him somehow?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko shook his head. “Not without violence, which I am firmly trying to avoid. Unfortunately, Tu Lan holds the titles for miles of dockside on the coast of a city called Bhan-Lu. His power comes from his connections to older fire nation families, who all have ties in old money. Any attempt to unseat him on my end would result in a massive backlash from other nobles.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded along. “So he knows you have no leverage against him to make any demands.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki sent Zuko an exasperated look. “I have hated that man since the second I met him. I keep begging to throw javelins at him but someone keeps turning me down.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled. “Would that I could, Suki. Also the feeling is mutual.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki rolled her eyes. “I'm just saying, he could at least <em>attempt</em> to come to negotiations with an open mind. I also hate that he has it out for you. Whiny scumbag.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's gaze snapped to Zuko's, eyes flashing with curiosity. “And why does he dislike you?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko resisted the urge to look skyward, instead he toyed with the sleeve of his robe. “When my Uncle stepped down as Firelord, and I replaced him, Tu Lan took that as an invitation to send every possible marriage candidate from his city to the palace gates. I rejected every one.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's brows shot up, “How many did he send?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko grimaced. “I lost count after a while. Though I am fairly certain that there was at least one person that tried twice, thinking I wouldn't recognize them. It was a terrible few months.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki snickered. “For you it was, yes. Although I can't say it was not entertaining to watch hordes of beautiful men and women throw themselves at you only to be tossed out on their ass every time. It was pretty wild.”</p><p> </p><p>“I take it none of them caught your eye?” Sokka looked morbidly curious.</p><p> </p><p>“I am not interested in anyone trying to buy my favour with a warm body.” Zuko frowned. “It is the exact thing that destroyed my mother, and I do not wish to put anyone else in that position.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka seemed to retreat into himself slightly. “Apologies, I shouldn't have pried.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko waved him off, “It's alright, it is fairly common knowledge anyways.” He sighed and stood up, ignoring the rush of blood to his already aching temples. “I'm afraid this is not going to be the standard, boring, day-to-day meeting I promised you. I would understand if you wanted to sit this one out.”</p><p> </p><p>“Not a chance.” Sokka stretched with a smirk and straightened, placing his hands on his hips. “You've peaked my interest now, I've got to see how awful this man really is.”</p><p> </p><p>“Don't say I didn't warn you, I want it on record that it was not my intention to throw you to the wolves so soon.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka cocked his head and gave him an unreadable expression, “Good thing I know how to bite back then.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki chimed in, standing up and making for the door. “Who knows, maybe this time will go a bit better.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It was <em>not</em> going better. It was not even <em>going</em>. They had been seated deliberating for nearly two hours and had made no great strides towards any sort of compromise. If anything they were going backwards, with Tu Lan asking for a bolster in his labour force with no plan in place to compensate them.</p><p> </p><p>He was a stout man, a memory of once prominent muscles lost to indulgence in his retirement. He wore finer clothes than even Zuko owned, as if it would somehow prove his leadership and power.</p><p> </p><p>It did not help that Zuko's headache had been increasing in severity since the moment they sat down, and was well on its way to becoming a full grown migraine. The louder and more agitated the council and Tu Lan became, the worse his temples throbbed.</p><p> </p><p>Someone slammed a hand against the table, and the loud crack of sound made Zuko wince. He snuck a glance at Sokka, expecting him to be barely paying attention at this point, and found him instead looking directly back at him. Stormy eyes met his, and flashed in concern.</p><p> </p><p>To Zuko's left, Councilman Tai was rapidly losing patience. As one of the oldest advisors in the room, and generally one of more easy going ones, it was no small feat to pull a rise out of him.</p><p> </p><p>“See, we might be willing to <em>entertain</em> the idea of sending some of our workers to assist you, if we had any indication that you were going to pay them appropriately.”</p><p> </p><p>Tu Lan scoffed. “I require the workers in order to account for the increasing number of ships frequenting the docks. The money for them will come on its own <em>after</em> the goods are sold.”</p><p> </p><p>“You are the main shipping access for goods for all of the fire nation.” Sokka's voice suddenly cut through the rows of people, and instantly all eyes were on him. “See now that's interesting, where exactly do your all of your imports come from?”</p><p> </p><p>Tu Lan looked utterly uninterested. “Well I certainly don't import from the Southern Water Tribe so I don't see how this involves you in any way, <em>Ambassador</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt anxiety crawl up throat, but as he watched, Sokka's whole demeanor shifted. The gentle, kind man Zuko had met the day before ago disappeared entirely, replaced with a cold smile and calculating eyes. The hardened soldier had finally made its appearance.</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, I am aware. The thing is, <em>Governor</em>, I happen to have the authority to speak for both the Southern, <em>and</em> Northern Water Tribes.” Sokka made a show of pulling out one of the documents that Zuko had given him earlier. “And, according to this, you pull 30% of your imports from the Earth Kingdom, and a whopping 70% from the Northern Water Tribe.”</p><p> </p><p>The room was silent. Every advisor was staring wide-eyed at Sokka, Zuko included.</p><p> </p><p>Tu Lan was beginning to turn a magnificent shade of purple, “And I am just supposed to believe that via word of mouth? Awfully foolish to lie to someone such as me, boy.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sat in horrified silence, but he watched as Sokka stood and handed a piece of parchment to Azir, who was seated beside him.</p><p> </p><p>“It is not common knowledge. I had intended to bring it forth to the council later, as this is <em>literally my first day</em>, but it seems like I need to announce it earlier than expected. Lord Azir, if you please.”</p><p> </p><p>The shorter Councilman jolted slightly “Yes! Sorry.” He opened the parchment, pushing his spectacles up his nose. “This Decree is to state that Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe has been granted the ability to barter in both trade and political matters in my stead, with my full authority as the Chief of the Northern Water Tribe, and act as an official liasion in my abscence. Signed Chief Yue. And it bears the official wolf's head seal of the North.”</p><p> </p><p>While he spoke, Sokka rounded the table, swiping the prepped contract from in front of Tai and stepping in front of Tu Lan, who was gaping at him like a trout.</p><p> </p><p>“You cannot be-”</p><p> </p><p>“Serious?” Sokka looked delighted by the swing this conversation had taken, and Zuko could only watch on in disbelief. “Look, I will be honest with you. Currently I would love to let that woman,” He pointed just behind Zuko to where Suki stood at attention, “run you through with a spear like the gutless fish you are. As it stands, I would rather get this over quickly, and blood is hard to get out of white marble floors.”</p><p> </p><p>He slapped the contract down in front of the enraged Governor. “Yue extended trade to the Fire Nation as an act of good faith after the war. She would've chosen your particular ports due to proximity and ease of access, but that could be easily changed to somewhere else. Especially as you told me yourself that you do not have the appropriate work force to handle it anymore. Or, you can sign this, actually pay your workers a living wage, and continue living the lap of luxury. Your call.”</p><p> </p><p>All eyes were on them, as the Governor seemed to finally realize he had been outmatched. Zuko was badly impressed.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka still stood in front of him, waiting with a bored look on his face, as Tu Lan slowly reached for his quill.</p><p> </p><p>“I don't know what it is you are trying to achieve here,” Tu Lan hissed, “If you are attempting to gain favour with Firelord Zuko you are wasting your breath. I offered many candidates to him that were all turned away. You would think with his <em>disfigurement</em> he would've leapt at the chance, but perhaps he inherited his poor sense from that degenerate mother of his.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes widened in shock, and his stomach bottomed out. This could not be happening, in a room full of people.</p><p> </p><p>This was a nightmare. He had <em>had</em>, this exact nightmare.</p><p> </p><p>A chorus of furious voices sounded around him as the council leapt to his defense, but they were cut off abruptly as a loud crack of metal hitting wood sounded through the room. Zuko's eyes landed on the source almost instantly. A dagger, stabbed through the sleeve of Tu Lan's robe, into the table below.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's haughty mask had fallen away completely, leaving only glacial fury in it's wake. He kept his voice low and deadly. “I wasn't aware that simply <em>doing my job</em> could be construed as a declaration of romantic pursuits, though seeing as how you yourself are married, maybe the bar really is that low.” He stood slowly, removing the blade and picking the contract back up. “As it stands, you have now worn through my last remaining shred of generosity. Governor Tu Lan, the Northern Water Tribe hereby withdraws all of its trade from your district, and will seek a new route for its ships by the end of the week.” He raised a hand and tore the unmarked contract in half.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka finally took a step back and glanced around at their audience. “Any suggestions on a coastal city that could use an hefty economy boost?”</p><p> </p><p>Alina Razeen, one of the newest on the council spoke up then, “I have a cousin who controls the district 30 miles south of there. The port is mostly used for fishing vessels but the infrastructure would easily handle heavy traffic. She would also need a large influx of laborers though.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai laughed directly to Zuko's left, “Well there are likely to be a large number of people suddenly in need of work in Bhan Lu. I'm sure they would be amenable to a change of scenery provided your cousin would be willing to sign a similar contract to give them a decent living wage.”</p><p> </p><p>Alina nodded, “I'm sure she would. I will send her a missive as soon as we are done here.”</p><p> </p><p>The loud scrape of a chair made Zuko jump as Tu Lan stood and stormed out of the hall. The resulting silence as the door slammed shut behind him was almost eerie.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka, seemingly only just realizing he was standing center stage in a room full of people, rubbed a sheepish hand down the back of his neck. “Well, so much for just observing today. Apologies everyone, I didn't mean for that to get quite so out of hand.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai, for all that he was a generally reserved man, burst out laughing. He was quickly joined by others around the room. “Do not apologize, that was the most fun I've had in <em>ages</em>. Regardless, you really only said what the rest of us were thinking.” He clapped his hands together, “Now, Alina you go ahead and get in contact with your cousin, see how much we can get accomplished quickly. Everyone else, I believe we are done for today, unless you have some way to assist her.”</p><p> </p><p>The council began to disperse, but Tai turned to Zuko instead of following suit. “As much as I am pleased with how today ended up, I am sorry you had to hear what that <em>weasel</em> said about you in front of the council.” The elderly man looked genuinely concerned. “I hope you know that none of us think such things of you.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't seem to find his voice for moment, but ultimately sighed. “Thank you, but its not as if I haven't heard it all before. It's fine.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>No</em>, its <em>not</em>.” Zuko looked up to see Sokka staring down at the pair with a pained expression. He took a heavy breath through his nose.</p><p> </p><p>“That man was <em>despicable</em>. I should have taken your warning about him to heart, I'm sorry you got caught in the crossfire.”</p><p> </p><p>Before Zuko could reply, Tai interrupted. “You are Hakoda's son yes?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka cocked his head to the side, confused. “I... yes, I am?”</p><p> </p><p>Tai gazed up at him. “Should've figured. I've never met him, but in my youth I used to visit the Southern Water Tribe occasionally. I knew your grandfather, and his brother. You are very alike them both.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka softened, “Kalik and Bakor? That's amazing, I never met them, they passed before I was born.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai smiled sadly. “War takes everything from all people. I wish you had, you would have much in common I think. I would be happy to tell you a bit about them on a rainy day, if you've a mind.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, absolutely.”</p><p> </p><p>“Good. As it stands today, we will have quite a bit of paperwork to handle in the next week, could you make sure that your decree is safely locked into the vault downstairs? I don't want any ruffians getting a hold of it.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded, “Will do.” He looked to Zuko then. “See you back at the palace?”</p><p> </p><p>At Zuko's nod, he picked up his work from the table and made a swift exit.</p><p> </p><p>Tai watched him leave, a pensive look on his face. “I really should've known, they are so similar.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sent him an amused look. “In what way? Stubborn? Prone to throwing themselves into terrible situations with no regard for their own image or safety?”</p><p> </p><p>Tai smiled at that. “Both of those things are true as well, but no. They are all... territorial.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sent him a puzzled look, waiting for him to elaborate, but he said nothing else. He simply bid him a good evening, before standing and making his way out.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When Zuko finally made his way to his chambers that night, his exhaustion had reached a whole new level. He lit a small candle on his way to bed, but stopped as something caught his eye on the desk.</p><p> </p><p>A small glass vial sat on the wooden surface, on top of a scrawled note. He made his way over, removing his hair pin, and picked up the page.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Zuko,</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I am sorry if I over stepped today. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I would like you to know that in my culture, scars are considered marks of bravery. They are proof that you have overcome something terrible, and are still alive despite it. As a child I always thought that they were beautiful, and my opinion has never changed. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>-Sokka</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>p.s. This vial helps relieve headaches, a gift from my sister. Rub a small amount into your temples.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt very off kilter, and was actually horrified to find he was almost near tears. The stress of the day and the constant pain had quite literally taken quite a toll, but this single act of quiet kindness seemed to be the nail in the coffin.</p><p> </p><p>He pulled the cork on the vial and instantly smelled a mint-like mixture. He did as instructed and rubbed a small amount onto his finger tips before running them along the sides of his temples. He blew out a ragged breath as his skin tingled in their wake.</p><p> </p><p>He undressed quickly and curled up in his bed, letting his exhaustion sweep him away.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Tu Lan: *Insults Sokka*<br/>Sokka: Annoying.</p><p>Tu Lan: *Insults Zuko*<br/>Sokka: sO yOu HaVe ChOsEn DeAtH.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Of Respite and Recreation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Another long one! We are getting into some meaty parts now lads and lasses and lassoos. Sorry for the delay, this one took a while to edit through.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>By the time the week was out, Sokka never wanted to sign another piece of paper in his life. Almost non-stop meetings with mail and runners sent and received every day, but the end result was worth it. All the i's were dotted and all the t's were crossed, and they were finally finished. Alena's cousin, Briala, would handle overseeing the new trade post. All that was left to do was sit and wait to see what adjustments might be needed as it began to work.</p><p> </p><p>The council had come to the collective agreement to take the day off today, barring any emergencies. Exhaustion flowed through every one of them, but not without an equal amount of satisfaction.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had slogged to his bed after dinner the night before, announcing that unless the palace was under siege, no one was to wake him before midday.</p><p> </p><p>Suki had gone to her rooms with a bottle of wine, and a similar demand.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had barely had a chance to speak to Zuko this week, other than a quick shared meal on the odd day. They had both been running paperwork back and forth from their respective contacts, and rarely had a more than a second for a quick greeting. He hoped that being buried in paperwork was the only reason for the lack of communication. He still felt a pang of guilt over how the deal went down with Tu Lan. Zuko hadn't seemed angry, then or now, but it still ate at Sokka a bit in the back of his mind.</p><p> </p><p>A different part of him quietly snarled that he should have driven that knife three inches closer and pinned that wretched man's hand to the table instead of just the cloth of his sleeve.</p><p> </p><p>Unlike Zuko, Sokka's restless thoughts hadn't allowed him to sleep in much longer than daybreak. Spending the bulk of his time in a chair this past week had left him yearning to work his muscles out a bit, and he picked his way down the palace steps to the sandy courtyard.</p><p> </p><p>He discovered he was not alone.</p><p> </p><p>Princess Izumi stood to one end of the massive arena. For the first time since he met her, she had ditched her royal garb and was instead dressed in simple black trousers and shirt. She was slowly working through what Sokka quickly realized were fire-bending forms. Minus the fire.</p><p> </p><p>She stopped when she spotted him, waving hello as he made his way to her.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had quickly developed a fondness for the young princess, and was pleased she had become more at ease around him after their initial meeting. Instead, the initial shyness had been replaced by dry humour and a quiet snark that he deeply enjoyed. Often during the week she would see him speaking with some official or another in the palace and would sign remarks at him, off to the side where only he could see her.</p><p> </p><p>Things like <em>“Am I wrong, or does this man smell like cabbages?” </em>or <em>“Doesn't her collar make her look like a lion vulture?” </em></p><p> </p><p>Each time he would have to look away from her to avoid busting out laughing, and it quickly became a new game. Every time she was unsuccessful she would up the ante a bit to see if you could make him break. He began to look forward to seeing her face poke out from behind an alcove to send mild jabs his way.</p><p> </p><p>Today though, her gaze seemed oddly faraway. Eyes just slightly darkened with fatigue.</p><p> </p><p>“Good morning Princess. Seems we have the same idea today.” He gestured to his similar clothing choice. “I hope you don't mind some company?”</p><p> </p><p>She smiled up at him, <em>“More the merrier. Uncle usually joins me on his days off, but I doubt I will see him this morning.” </em>She wrinkled her nose. <em>“Looked like death warmed over last night. Smelt like it too.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed, “You certainly don't pull punches do you? I'm sure I didn't look that much better than he did after we finished yesterday.”</p><p> </p><p>She gave him an assessing look. <em>“True. I didn't think you would be awake this early either. Couldn't sleep?”</em></p><p> </p><p>“Not for long. My mind feels like mashed potatoes but apparently the rest of me isn't in agreement.” He returned her look in kind. “What about you? You don't seem particularly well rested either.”</p><p> </p><p>The distant look about her returned, and her eyes dropped to the off white sand. <em>“Dreams. Couldn't seem to shake them and fall back to sleep, so I decided to just get up instead.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka frowned. He was no stranger to such things himself, but he wasn't about to pry, so he changed direction.</p><p> </p><p>“You are a fire bender?” He gestured to where she had abandoned her stance. “I probably should've guessed that.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi shrugged. <em>“Yes and no. I can bend, but I have poor control. Uncle still insists I practice the forms for safety, and I do find them calming, if nothing else.”</em></p><p> </p><p>“Poor control? Too much fire or not enough?”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi lifted one corner of her mouth in wry grin. <em>“Last time I tried, I blew a hole in that building.”</em> She gestured to a structure beside them.</p><p> </p><p>Now that she had pointed it out he could indeed see a rather large section of slightly off-shade roofing tiles, as if they had been recently replaced. He laughed and wolf-whistled. “Well that's impressive.”</p><p> </p><p>She rolled her eyes at him,<em> “Grandfather spent a lot of time coaching me through it as well, and sometimes I could do it just fine. He always said something like 'fire only reflects the emotions of the self, calm your mind and they will be calm'”. </em>She shrugged. <em>“Easier said than done.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka chuckled. “Yes that certainly sounds like him. I definitely remember him saying something similar when he was training a friend of mine. Iroh is a relatively unflappable person, so it makes sense that that is how he would see it. I take it you did not inherit his limitless patience?”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi cast him a half annoyed look and went to respond, but froze and looked at something over Sokka's shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>It was that, and only that, which stopped Sokka from face planting into the sand when a blur of pink crashed into him from above.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt decidedly more human when he left his rooms. He knew it was at least a couple hours after daybreak, but it was freeing to not know the exact time. His path to the dining hall was oddly silent, he wasn't sure where anyone currently was, but he didn't think they had made any specific plans elsewhere today.</p><p> </p><p>He made his way into the kitchens and made a beeline for a plate that had obviously been left out for him. He turned around to take it to the table and nearly dropped it in surprise when he saw a familiar dark haired woman already seated, staring at him through steepled fingers.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt his brain short-circuit. Maybe he was still asleep. “Um. Hello? Mai is there a reason why you are in my kitchen?”</p><p> </p><p>Unreadable amber eyes stared back at him. “Hello Zuko. I need your help.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko didn't think his eyebrows could get any higher. “My help... with?”</p><p> </p><p>She stood up then and gestured for him to follow her. He looked forlornly at his untouched meal.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Agni</em>, Zuko just bring it with you, we aren't going far.”</p><p> </p><p>He was so lost, but he followed obediently if only to get some answers. “Is everything okay? I didn't realize you were even in the city.”</p><p> </p><p>She didn't turn to look at him, but she did reply. “Word has gotten around about your new Ambassador-turned-attack-dog. Ty Lee demanded we make a special trip here to visit and meet 'a worthy opponent'.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt a hot spike of panic. “Oh no.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh yes. I spent nearly two hours watching them tumble around in the dirt like children before I gave up and came inside. I'm hoping you can put a stop to it so I can <em>move on with my life</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>They rounded the entrance to the courtyard and Zuko could indeed see two figures twirling through their own man-made dust cloud. Izumi was seated on a bench near them, with a tea tray beside her. She looked up at their approach with a smile. They made their way down and Zuko seated himself to her left, uncovering his breakfast and scarfing some down as he watched the display.</p><p> </p><p>It appeared to be less sparring and more coordinated tossing. Ty Lee was quicker by leagues, but her hits didn't land terribly hard against Sokka. She would strike two or three times before he would find the rhythm and block before using his bulk to throw her several feet backwards.</p><p> </p><p>The pair of them paused a few minutes later when they turned enough to notice the additions to their audience, sweat and sand lining them both.</p><p> </p><p>Mai raised an eyebrow and said dryly, “Can I have my wife back now?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gave her a bemused look, hands braced on his hips. “I don't know what part of this makes it seem like <em>she</em> is the one being held hostage, but please by all means, take her.”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee elbowed him lightly in the side. “Oh come on, you have to admit this is pretty fun, I haven't had someone able to keep pace with me like that in forever!”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko looked between them. “I'm surprised you didn't just chi-block him to win, Agni knows you've done it to me enough times.”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee smiled cheerfully, “I already tried, but check this out!” She sent a sharp jab just below Sokka's collar bone, making the warrior flinch back with a grunt as his arm went slack. “He recovers faster than anyone I've ever met! Pretty neat, huh?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gave her an exasperated look. “Yes. Neat. I'm so very impressive. Can we stop demonstrating that now, please?” He rubbed at his chest where she had struck him, but even as he spoke Zuko could see that the feeling was rapidly returning, fingers beginning to twitch and flex as nerves began to fire again. Sokka looked to Zuko, “I take it you know this lunatic?” He pointed at Ty Lee, who shoved his finger away from her.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko opened his mouth to answer but Ty Lee beat him to the punch. “Oh yes, Zu-zu and I go way back. Mai and I grew up with him and Azula, but it's been a while since we visited.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko saw Sokka's eyes widen and he signed <em>Zuzu?!</em> to Izumi, who snorted beside him. Zuko bumped her shoulder, making her spill a bit of tea onto her pant leg. She treated him to a sour look that he returned. He looked back at Sokka, “don't you dare.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka raised both hands in peaceful gesture. “Wouldn't dream of it.” It would have been convincing if not for the delighted grin on his face.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi poked Zuko to get his attention. <em>“You should have a go.” </em>She gestured towards Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gave her a suspicious look. “And why should I do that?” It got the attention of the other three, who had been speaking amongst themselves.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka looked at them, confused. “Do what?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed, “the princess seems to think that I should try my hand at besting you.”</p><p> </p><p>Mai groaned in exasperation but Ty Lee bounced excitedly. “Oh yes! We were not very evenly matched, our styles are not that similar, but you would be much more compatible I think.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka looked at him, assessing, “Your call. Could be interesting.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi reached over and took Zuko's half empty plate, all but shoving him off the bench. He turned and glared. “Traitor.”</p><p> </p><p>She smiled nonchalantly. <em>“You promised you would try and kick his butt if he was rude to me, now I get to see if you actually could. Besides which I love to watch you fight.” </em></p><p> </p><p>“I stand by what I said. <em>Traitor,</em>” but he turned and made his way into the ring beside Sokka, taking care to pull all of his hair up into a ponytail at the back of his head to get it out of the way.</p><p> </p><p>The water tribesman sized him up as he got near, and Zuko fought down a flush as he felt himself being looked up and down. He took up a simple stance, breathed deeply through his nose. and waited.</p><p> </p><p>Not for long, Sokka seemed impatient to test the waters, and took two quick strides to swing a kick at Zuko's side. Zuko easily could have simply blocked it, but instead traveled with the kick, hooking his own leg around Sokka's knee and flipping him onto his back with a thud. Blue eyes widened in surprise.</p><p> </p><p>He was about to apologize, he hadn't meant to go quite that hard out of the gate, when Sokka grinned with a few too many teeth, snaking a heel behind Zuko's knee and knocking him onto his ass. Sokka laughed, delightedly, “oh, this should be fun.” He hopped up and extended a hand to Zuko to help him up. He took it, but as his hand slid over Sokka's wrist, he felt the dull <em>thump</em> of Sokka's pulse against his fingertips. Zuko took in a sharp breath as the sensation seemed to travel up the length of his own arm.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's pupils blew out for a moment before he shook his head and quickly hauled Zuko up. “<em>Again</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>With the ice broken, they went at each other with no reservations. Punches and strikes were blocked and deflected. Kicks hit air and sand but rarely connected to muscle. Normally fights like this would frustrate Zuko, but with Sokka, he <em>revelled</em> in being matched so thoroughly. They rolled and tumbled and sprawled in the sand, and it quickly began to feel less like fighting and more like dancing, a constant give and take. His muscles burned and ached but he felt more energized than he had in months.</p><p> </p><p>From Sokka's sharp grin and heavy breath, he could tell the feeling was mutual.</p><p> </p><p>Exhausted, they each gave a final push at each other. Zuko stopped a fist seeking his ribs, while Sokka blocked a foot striking towards his throat. Finished and spent, Zuko dropped his leg and backed up, panting hard. Sokka did the same, and stared at him with open amazement. Zuko was sure his own face mirrored the expression.</p><p> </p><p>A smattering of applause sounded from behind them and Zuko startled badly. He had entirely forgotten their audience. He flushed hot with embarrassment, turning to look at the group. The three women had been joined by Suki as well and he had never even noticed.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi's mouth was hanging open, <em>“Uncle. That was </em>incredible<em>.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee grinned wide. “Told you so, well matched.” Mai rolled her eyes at her wife but even she looked reluctantly impressed.</p><p> </p><p>Suki glared at the pair of them. “I sleep in for <em>one</em> day, and you two turnips decide to beat the crap out of <em>each other</em>? That's great. Two of the people I'm supposed to be keeping safe have taken it upon themselves to take matters into their own hands. I will take zero blame for any injuries sustained if you decide to do this again.” She had a sour look that was helped along by dark bags under her eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed. “How is that hangover, Suki?”</p><p> </p><p>She didn't dignify him with an answer, but Zuko was surprised that Sokka didn't simply turn to ash under the vicious glare he received.</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee stretched and stood, bouncing on her toes lightly. “Well, consider my curiosity, satisfied.” She patted Sokka on the arm, before turning and offering Mai her hand. The pair stood together, lacing their fingers. “We are planning on going down to the open market tomorrow while we are in town, you should consider joining us.” She smirked at Sokka. “Might dissuade some of the rumours.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka groaned and scrubbed a hand down his face. “Tui and La, they started already?”</p><p> </p><p>Mai's eyes were amused, even if her voice came out even. “Nothing stirs the pot like politics. Also, you are apparently the most exciting thing that has happened in the city for months. We heard about you all the way in Fire Fountain City.”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee covered her laugh with her free hand. “The going belief over there is that 'the vicious Ambassador from the south', <em>tore</em> Tu Lan's throat out when he dared to speak against you.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki snickered. “I heard a good one from Izumi's school a few days ago. Apparently the theory from teenage girls is that you were so very handsome that Tu Lan simply dropped dead of a heart attack in vain jealousy.” She turned to Sokka with a wicked grin. “I don't see it.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sent her a sour look and sat down in the sand in defeat, stretching his long legs out in front of him. “Why is he dead in all of them? Do they honestly think I would just be walking around if I had murdered someone on my first day?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled. “Wishful thinking, probably. Tu Lan isn't terribly liked by anyone.” He glanced back at the girls. “You are right though, it would be a good idea for Sokka to be seen out and about. As a normal person.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka leaned back and cracked an eye at him. “Define 'normal'. Also you better not be suggesting I go out on the town by myself with these two. They're terrifying.”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee laughed cheerily. “Aw, thanks!” She caught Zuko's eyes and her gaze turned to pure mischief. “I'm sure if you asked nicely, our resident sour-puss Firelord could be convinced to accompany you. He can stand to waste a few hours with his friends at least.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's face flushed hot, and he was glad that Sokka was laying with his eyes closed against the sun. He glared at her but kept his voice light. “I'm sure I could make time.”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee winked at him. “It's a date.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko slipped smoothly into the hot water of his private bath. He knew he would be sore tomorrow regardless, but the heat felt like heaven on his sore muscles.</p><p> </p><p>He still couldn't believe the events of the day. He could not truly remember the fight moment to moment, it all seemed to blur together when he tried to rewind it in his head.</p><p> </p><p>Except for the very beginning.</p><p> </p><p>He remembered the feel of Sokka's pulse across his fingertips. The heady thrum of <em>life</em> that had seemed to resonate between them. It had been so strange, almost... familiar.</p><p> </p><p>He used his left hand to continue to add heat to his bath water, but brought his right up in front of him, studying it. If he concentrated, he swore he could feel it again. Like a ghost of sensation firing up his nerves.</p><p> </p><p>He leaned back fully in the bath, watching the steam curl out the open window in front of him, visible in the naked moonlight outside.</p><p> </p><p>His mind was a whirlwind of sensation. Stripped of context, his body only remembered the physical feeling of Sokka against him. The weight and heat of him, along with the push and pull of their bodies dancing through the sand, had a different kind of heat curling low in Zuko's belly.</p><p> </p><p>He rested his head against his the rim of the tub and groaned in defeat.</p><p> </p><p>He was fucked.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In a different wing, Sokka once again stood out on his balcony. He gazed up at the waning moon shining above the glowing city, and let the light soak his bare skin.</p><p> </p><p>His ribs ached as if they were suddenly too tight for his chest.</p><p> </p><p>He gazed down at his right hand, and allowed himself the briefest moment to hope.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>¯\_(ツ)_/¯ </p><p>Hope you enjoyed</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Of Taste Tests and Turtle Ducks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter is fairly light, the next one... not so much.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>The first morning return to council meetings went by ridiculously fast. The few people that had appointments had seemed in quite a rush to get out of there. Zuko had to stifle a laugh a few times whenever their eyes strayed over to Sokka, as if they thought he might simply tear them apart for speaking out of line. He could get used to this.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka on the other hand, seemed slightly mortified by the whole ordeal. When the last trader of the day had left, he laid his head down on the table and groaned in exasperation. “Great, now they're all terrified of me.”</p><p> </p><p>A smattering of amusement sounded through the room as Azir patted his shoulder in a 'there there' motion. “Come now Ambassador, it's not all bad! You have certainly expedited the process today at least.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai smiled at the disgruntled water tribesman as the rest of the council began to pack up to return to their respective homes. “They will come around, it will just take time. Currently all anyone has really heard of you has been about your, um, <em>exuberance</em>, the other day. The more they deal with you, the quicker that will change.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka lifted his head and scrubbed a hand down his face. “I hope so, I do not particularly enjoy being feared. I never did.” He looked to Zuko. “Do you know when we are meeting Mai and Ty Lee today?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded. “I told them mid-afternoon, just in case the morning ran long but,” he gestured to the near empty chamber with amusement, “we now have a few hours to kill until then.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stood and stretched, and Zuko tried very hard not to stare at the flex of his shoulders as he did so. “Good. Then I have time to find an outfit that makes me look less intimidating, apparently.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai chuckled, packing up his own things and handing a few last documents over for Zuko to sign off on.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed as well and called after Sokka as he went to step out of the room. “Please do not walk into my city in your pajamas just to make yourself seem more approachable.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka froze in the doorway, and turned to Zuko with a wicked grin. “Tempting, though I don't think it would help matters much. I sleep in the buff.” He winked at the pair of them and strode out without another word.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's mouth dropped open and he could feel his face flush bright red, glad that everyone else had cleared the room already.</p><p> </p><p>Tai burst into gentle laughter beside him, “Oh, I <em>do</em> like him.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't help but silently agree.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko didn't know what he expected Sokka to consider 'approachable' clothing choices, but now he felt as if the gods were subjecting him to some kind of trial that he desperately wanted to opt out of. When he came to collect Sokka from his wing, the water tribesman had opened the door and Zuko felt his brain vacate his skull.</p><p> </p><p>He was wearing simple light cotton pants, loose and hemmed just below his knees, but his shirt was like a second skin made of deep navy fabric. It rose high and wrapped around his throat like a choker, but it was sleeveless, which only accentuated the intricate tattoos laced down each arm.</p><p> </p><p>If Sokka noticed Zuko's quiet internal panic, he didn't let on. He gestured to himself. “Is this better? Do you think?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko didn't think. Zuko's mind had flown out the window with any of his decent thoughts attached, apparently.</p><p> </p><p>“I, um, yes? It looks... fine?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka ran a hand through his loose hair and blew his breath out. “I very quickly realized that most of the clothing I own could be considered <em>armour</em>, so my choices were limited.” He stepped back to allow Zuko to enter his rooms, and walked over to a dresser. “I will be a minute, I just need to get my hair up before we leave.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko followed him in, trying hard not to look at all of Sokka's personal affects strewn across the room. A large shelf caught his eye though, holding a collection of familiar looking glass vials. He made his way over, squinting to try and read the tiny labels. He could tell that most of them were some kind of herb or plant, but he had never heard of most of them. “I should have thanked you, earlier. For helping with my headache. You said you got that from your sister?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, Katara is quite the healer. When she found out I was coming here for a more permanent stay, she packed me an obnoxiously sized the med-kit. Now I basically have my own pharmacy, and that shelf is only half of it, the other is still in one of the trunks.” Footsteps came up from behind him. “It did help then, what I gave you?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded. “It did, very much so. I suffer headaches fairly frequently due to the nerve damage from my burn. It was a lifesaver last week when we were putting in those long days.” He straightened and turned back around.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had forgone his standard wolf-tail and had instead woven his hair into an elegant braid, similar to Zuko's style just with shaved sides. He was looking at Zuko with open concern. “I'm sorry, I should have paid better attention. I wish you had said something, you should have taken some breaks if it was getting that bad.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko suddenly felt a bit uncomfortable with the direction this conversation was taking. He glanced away, a bit embarrassed. “It's okay, I... well I have been through far worse. And like I said, you helped me quite a bit regardless, that stuff you gave me is amazing.” He met Sokka's gaze again with a small smile.</p><p> </p><p>The water tribesman still looked a bit upset, but he appeared to take Zuko's answer with only a bit of reluctance. “Well, let me know if you need more, I'm more than happy to make some to replenish your supply.”</p><p> </p><p>“I will, thank you.” Zuko quickly steered the topic away. “We should get going, the girls will be here soon.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka looked at him a moment longer, before he nodded and quietly walked over to his desk to grab a satchel. Over his shoulder he asked, “Is Suki coming with us as well?”</p><p> </p><p>“Ah, no. She said she felt comfortable having the three of you accompanying me in her stead.” Which was half true. Her exact words were more along the lines of, “<em>if the murder girls and Commander Knucklehead are going with you, then you are perfectly safe without me.”</em>, but he wasn't about to repeat that verbatim.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled as if he heard the missing parts anyway. “Well, in that case.” He reached down and grabbed a sword that had been propped up against the wall, strapping the harness over his shoulders.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gawked. “I really don't think that is necessary, Sokka. If you are trying to look less frightening this will definitely not help.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed and raised a brow at him. “I don't fear many things in this life, Zuko, but the wrath of a certain redhead if I take her charge out of the palace unarmed is certainly one of them.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed but didn't argue further.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled and walked back to the threshold to the hallway. He gestured with a hand for Zuko to lead the way. As he walked past him out the door, he felt fingers ghost across his back, feather light, as Sokka guided him through before turning and locking his chambers.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt the touch like flame.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The open market was, by its nature, busy. Vendors and performers and simply <em>people</em>, bustled around the large ocean side space like bees in a hive.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko loved it.</p><p> </p><p>Or more, he loved seeing what time and hard work had accomplished. People from all nations came in and out of this space, changing sales and market stalls weekly. Something that, thirty years ago, would have seemed like a fever dream.</p><p> </p><p>Mai and Ty Lee had been here many times before, so they knew what to expect. Sokka on the other hand looked around in complete awe as they strode through the large stone archways that marked the space.</p><p> </p><p>“This is incredible! Also something here smells amazing, can we grab some food before exploring?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed. “Anything in particular? That whole row is food vendors.” He pointed across the wharf, where a solid thirty market stalls were open with all manner of goods.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gaped. “I'm never leaving this market. I live here now. Tell Izumi to come visit me in my new home.” He jogged over ahead of them, looking back and forth and apparently finding something that suited him because he disappeared into a lineup.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was not particularly hungry, but he did buy himself a large tropical drink made in a coconut as he waited for the others. It was one of his favourite things, and with winter starting to set in it wouldn't be available for much longer.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka returned first, with an assortment of different grilled items on skewers that he quickly began to demolish.</p><p> </p><p>The girls came back as well, Mai holding a similar drink to Zuko, and Ty Lee holding a container of fish balls on small individual sticks.</p><p> </p><p>“This is amazing, how does anyone live here and do anything but eat?” Sokka tore the the last bit of some kind of grilled meat off a skewer, and pointed it at Zuko. “You've been holding out on me.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised an eyebrow. “If you want to walk three miles to and from for every meal, be my guest. I am perfectly happy with my own kitchen and staff.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka opened his mouth to argue, and somehow Zuko knew it would be something along the lines of, “move the market closer”, but Ty Lee interrupted.</p><p> </p><p>“Here, you should try this.” She offered some of her speared fish, and before Zuko could warn him off of it Sokka had already popped one in his mouth and ate it.</p><p> </p><p>He only had to wait a few seconds before colour started to rise in Sokka's cheeks from the extreme spice of the dish and he coughed, swallowing hard.</p><p> </p><p>“What the?” His eyes started to water and he turned a scathing look at Ty Lee. “You. You are evil. You are an evil, terrible woman, wrapped in a sweet pink package. I have known you for barely one day, and you have already dropped out of the rafters to attack me, and now you've fed me lava, <em>why</em>?”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee burst out laughing and leaned against Mai. “Ah yes I have found the weak link in your armour! I now know I can best you in combat with a simple spicy fish ball.” She continued to laugh, arms folded across her stomach as tears sprang to her own eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko rolled his eyes at the pained whine coming from the warrior. He did relent after a moment and offered his drink to Sokka. “Here, try some of this, it will help.” Zuko tried very to stifle any reaction as Sokka immediately gripped the beverage over top of his own hand, taking a deep drink.</p><p> </p><p>He released Zuko and groaned in relief. “Oh, thank the gods, that's better.” He turned his attention back to Ty Lee, who was still in near hysterics. “You're the worst. I'm revoking any consideration I had put into making you my friend.”</p><p> </p><p>Ty Lee waved a hand at him, unbothered. “Regular friendship is boring anyways, I prefer frenemies. Now, Mai need a few replacement darts, anyone opposed to heading to the weapon booths first?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes lit up with excitement. “Not at <em>all</em>.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>As the afternoon wore on, Sokka's bag became more and more stuffed with different trinkets. In one particular shop he had found a rather ridiculous figurine of Avatar Aang, and had laughed so hard Zuko thought they were going to ask him to leave. He was even more baffled when Sokka bought the damn thing, adding it to the pile.</p><p> </p><p>“This is perfect. I <em>need</em> to send this to Katara.”</p><p> </p><p>“Your sister?” Zuko frowned. “Isn't she married to him? Why would she want something like that?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka turned with a brilliant grin, “Oh she doesn't. In fact, she'll hate it, which is what makes this so exceptional. I mean look at this thing! Don't people know that he is an Air Nomad? He is not exactly built like a professional wrestler.”</p><p> </p><p>He was still twirling the figurine in his fingers as they exited the shop, and Zuko nearly walked straight into his back when he suddenly froze in front of him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko waited a moment, before coming up beside him and placing a hand on his shoulder. “Sokka? Are you alright?”</p><p> </p><p>The water tribesman's eyes seemed to be surveying the bustling crowd, looking on edge, but he leaned towards Zuko slightly to answer. “Yes. I think so, just a strange feeling.” Sokka placed the figure into his bag with the rest of his purchases, and lightly brushed his hand over the hilt of his sword, as if to remind himself that it was still there. He looked at Zuko then, and gave him a little half smile.“Years of being a soldier have made me a little jumpy in large crowds, it was probably nothing.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko frowned. “Okay. If you change your mind we can-”</p><p> </p><p>He was interrupted as an jubilant shout came from a shop a few rows down.</p><p> </p><p>“Lord Zuko! Lord Zuko!” A small, chubby cheeked boy dashed through the throngs of people and careened face first into Zuko's legs.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled brightly, steadying him with a hand. “Hello, Haruki, how are you?”</p><p> </p><p>The boy in question “Good! But I haven't seen you in <em>forever. </em>Momma said next time you were in the market I could come get you cause there is a surprise in the...” His eyes widened as he noticed Sokka standing next to Zuko, and he ducked slightly behind his hip, holding onto the cloth of Zuko's pant leg.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka peered down at the young boy in amusement, crouching down so he was at eye level and waving. “Hello?”</p><p> </p><p>Haruki stayed firmly planted behind Zuko, his earlier excitement overtaken by timidness, but he reached a hand out and waved back.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed softly at the water tribesman, who seemed to be doing everything he could to make himself smaller and less intimidating. “Haruki this is Sokka, our new Ambassador for the council. We are showing him around today because he's never been to the market before.”</p><p> </p><p>That seemed to break a bit of the tension in the young boy; his eyes widened as he peered around Zuko's legs once more. “You've never been here?!”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled, “Not until today, its pretty awesome though, isn't it?”</p><p> </p><p>Haruki nodded. “It's the <em>best</em>. Momma says its because Lord Zuko did all the work to let normal people trade here, so there is always the <em>coolest</em> stuff.”</p><p> </p><p>As if on cue, a frazzled woman with a silver mane of hair came around the corner of one of the shops. Inara smiled when she saw Zuko. “Ah, I should have known.” She turned to her son with a hand on her hip. “Haruki I know you missed your friend, but you need to tell me before you just run off!”</p><p> </p><p>Haruki scuffed his shoe slightly, “Yes Momma, but you said I could come get him if I saw him today.”</p><p> </p><p>Inara laughed, “Yes, I suppose I did, didn't I?” She turned to Zuko, “He has a bit of a surprise for you, if you have a minute.” She nodded towards Zuko's companions.</p><p> </p><p>He glanced around to ask the three of them, but Ty Lee was crouched, packing all of their things into a large backpack. “Sorry guys, we've got to love you and leave you. Have to make our carriage by sundown.” She stood, swinging her bag onto her back and taking Mai's hand, before turning a wink on Zuko. “Don't have too much fun without us.”</p><p> </p><p>He turned his gaze to Sokka, “Do you mind a detour?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned, “I've got nowhere important to be. Besides which I would be a pretty bad bodyguard if I let you get kidnapped from under my nose by a pre-schooler.”</p><p> </p><p>The girls bid a quick farewell, and headed off back to the main gates. Zuko offered his hand to Haruki. “Lead the way.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>A woman with graying hair and deep black robes watched from just inside a tea shop, eyes hard, as the Firelord and his companion disappeared around a corner.</p><p> </p><p>It could not be him. <em>He</em> could not be <em>here</em>.</p><p> </p><p>The barista inside gave her a pleasant smile and a small bow at her approach. “My Lady, would you like to order something?”</p><p> </p><p>She put on a genial smile. “No, thank you. Apologies but the crowd outside is a bit overwhelming, is there a back door here I could use?”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh! Um, yes of course, right through there. It is a bit of a mess though, sorry.”</p><p> </p><p>She waved her off. “It's fine, thank you very much.”</p><p> </p><p>As soon as she was out of sight, her face dropped into cold fury.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko would have forgotten about Sokka's earlier unease, except that the warrior had stuck to his side like glue as they walked the short distance to Inara's shop.</p><p> </p><p>Softly, so as not to alert Haruki, he leaned into him and whispered. “Are you sure you're alright?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded, “Yes, just... can we make this our last stop today? I think my paranoia is getting the best of me.”</p><p> </p><p>“Of course, I don't mind.”</p><p> </p><p>Haruki picked that moment to tug at his hand eagerly. “Come see!” He all but dragged Zuko to the back of the shop, where a small pool had been set up.</p><p> </p><p>Inside, were a pair of newly hatched turtleducks, quacking and splashing around excitedly.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes widened and he dropped to his knees beside the water. “Wow Haruki, look at them!” He offered his hand out, and they both swam over to gently peck at him.</p><p> </p><p>The young boy beamed. “The eggs you gave me hatched a few days ago. I named that one Shelley, but Momma said we should let you name the other, since they came from the palace.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gently picked up the one in question, bringing it out of the water and closer to his face. “Hmm, a name huh? Sokka, do you have any suggestions?” He glanced up where Sokka was standing just behind him.</p><p> </p><p>The warrior had a curious expression on his face as he leaned down to run a gentle finger down the critter's fuzzy neck. The turtleduck quacked indignantly at him, before grabbing the offending digit in it's beak.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka snorted, giving a dry laugh. “You seem like a Suki to me.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed, “Sounds about right, Suki and Shelley it is then.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The walk home was quiet but pleasant. Sokka had lost some of his tension with every step they had taken away from the market.</p><p> </p><p>As they started up the steps to the palace, Sokka knocked his hip lightly into Zuko's. “You're kind of amazing, do you know that?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko stopped short, looking at Sokka in shock as his cheeks reddened. “I... what?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka seemed to consider his words for a moment. “I was here once before, for a short stay just after Iroh took power. It was so different back then. Ozai had ruled for so long using fear to keep everyone under his thumb. He didn't inspire respect or loyalty, just... hopelessness. ”</p><p> </p><p>He turned to look at Zuko. “But you, Zuko you don't just have their respect, they <em>love</em> you.” He smiled, softly. “And with good reason, the change is... exponentially better. You have done so much to improve not just your own nation, but relations to the others as well. The happiness of your citizens is a testament to that.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko rubbed his arm self-consciously. Quietly, he said, “I can't take most of the credit. I have advisors who help me constantly, and Uncle was the one who started it all.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka raised an eyebrow. “And it is you who continues it. Look, you can ignore the praise all you like, but I have only been here for a couple of weeks, and even I can see how hard you work to keep improving. So, I stand by what I said. Kind of amazing.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't seem to find any kind of answer to that, or stop his face from becoming a tomato.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka seemed to sense his building anxiety, and smiled gently at him. “At any rate, I had a lot of fun today, thank you for coming with me.” He gave Zuko's shoulder a squeeze, before leaving in the direction of his rooms.</p><p> </p><p>To the now empty hall, Zuko quietly responded. “Anytime.”</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I have to take a moment to thank everyone who has been leaving kudos and commenting on this fic. I've had quite a tough week, and just seeing the little notification in my email each time gave me such a needed seratonin boost. You guys are the best &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Of Fear and Fairy Tales</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>CONTENT WARNING!!!! The very first section of the chapter depicts a character having a panic attack. If this is something that would make you uncomfortable please please please skip to the first ~~ line break. Read safely. &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>Sleep refused to come easy to Sokka that night. He couldn't figure out why, he was certainly tired, but he still felt uneasy, and weirdly energetic, as if someone had snapped him with static. He tossed constantly, somehow uncomfortable in every direction, and ended up giving up entirely and standing up in the dark.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka wanted to blame it on the spicy food from earlier in the day, but he wasn't so sure.</p><p> </p><p>He decided to make a late night run down to the kitchens, hoping a quick snack might reset his body into settling down. He threw a pair of loose cotton pants on and snagged a robe from his door on his way out to ward off the night's chill.</p><p> </p><p>As he passed the main hall, he noticed that the fire was absolutely roaring. Sokka frowned and slowly made his way over, taking care to keep his steps quiet. The large hearth was normally allowed to simmer down to coals overnight, so this was decidedly abnormal.</p><p> </p><p>As he neared it, he saw a small form sitting in front of it. It took a second for his eyes to adjust enough to realize it was <em>Izumi</em>, sitting on the floor with her knees tucked into her chin.</p><p> </p><p>He allowed his footfalls to sound as he neared her. “Princess? What are you doing up?”</p><p> </p><p>She didn't answer him, but seemed to shrink down even harder into herself. He frowned and stepped neatly around her, kneeling between her and the flames. Her eyes were dark and distant, staring past him into the fire. Tear trails streaked each of her cheeks.</p><p> </p><p>“Izumi?” Sokka reached out a hand to touch her arm, and nearly jolted with shock. “Gods, you're freezing!” He quickly shucked off his robe, throwing it around her small shoulders. He reached out a hand and lightly touched her cheek to wipe away the tears under her eye. “Princess, what happened?” She didn't react outwardly, but he could feel the muscles tense under his touch, and realized her jaw was clenched shut.</p><p> </p><p>He felt decidedly out of his depth.</p><p> </p><p>He kept his voice as low and calm as he could. “I'm going to get Zuko, I will be back as soon as I can, promise.” He went to stand up but a small hand shot out and grabbed his own with an impressive hold. Stricken golden eyes found his, freezing him in place. She looked at him as if he was the only real thing she could see, and maybe he was.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka felt the intense heat behind him, and heard a small strangled sound. He was horrified to realize she was trying to <em>speak</em> to him through her clenched teeth. Her face was ghost pale. He dropped straight back down to his knees and gently grabbed both her hands in his. “Whoa whoa, easy, okay I won't go anywhere.”</p><p> </p><p>Her grip was a vice where she held desperately onto his hands, and her breaths started coming faster and faster. Sokka gently tried to coax her into trying to calm herself, but it was as if she still couldn't hear him. She had closed her eyes tight and tucked her face into her folded knees once more, and he could hear her muffled struggles for air against the cloth of her pants. The fire roared louder behind his back.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka didn't know what else he could do to help her, so he took a gamble and hauled her forward into his arms. She clutched at his shoulders as she released his hands, near gasping for air against him. He stroked her back slowly as her hitching breaths caused the muscles to tighten, her whole body trembling in his hold.</p><p> </p><p>He lowered his head to her ear, so she would hear him without raising his voice. “It's okay Izzie, I promise. You're safe, you're with me, and I would never let anything happen to you. Nod if you understand me.” It was there, barely perceptible, but he felt the slight shift of her head against his throat. “Good! Good, okay. I want you to feel my breathing okay? I want you to try and match it. Slowly.” He made a point of breathing deeply, just slightly slower than he usually did.</p><p> </p><p>He waited, not moving a muscle, as she slowly managed to work her breaths down to his after a few minutes of stops and starts. As she did, Sokka noticed that the room was darkening, and he knew without looking that the flames behind him were dying with her panic.</p><p> </p><p>He said nothing, but loosened his hold instantly in relief when she pushed gently against his chest and sat up a little bit. She wiped a shaky hand over her red-rimmed eyes and worked her jaw loose.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka saw a thin trail of blood working its way down her chin, and realized she must have bitten her lip in her panic. He brought a hand up and cupped her face to brush the red away with his thumb.</p><p> </p><p>As quiet as he tried to be, his voice still sounded so loud in the large chamber. “Do you want to tell me what happened?” Izumi shuddered and shook her head, looking at the floor with pained eyes. She looked equal parts exhausted and embarrassed, and Sokka's heart clenched at the sight of the normally cheeky girl, reduced to this spectre.</p><p> </p><p>“I'm going to assume you don't want to try and sleep again.” She shook her head once more.</p><p> </p><p>He let her rest for another minute in silence, watching her slowly regain use of her muscles.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you think you can stand?” She studied him for a moment, seeming to have an internal battle with herself before she met his eyes and nodded.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka rocked back onto his heels, offering his hands to her. “C'mon.” As soon as he had a good grip, he pushed himself up off the floor and pulled her with him. She blew out a slow breath as she stood, balancing on shaky legs. He pulled her tighter into his side, wrapping an arm around her shoulders to steady her.</p><p> </p><p>“I was on my way to cause some havoc in the kitchens, but I certainly won't say no to some company.” He smiled down at her, and there she was, clear golden eyes finally looking back at him, if only to to give him a bemused look.</p><p> </p><p>He slowly began to lead her down the hall, when she squeezed his hand lightly to get his attention.</p><p> </p><p>With her free hand she signed, <em>“Thank you.”</em></p><p> </p><p>He tightened his arm around her, giving her a quick squeeze. “Anytime.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The barest hints of daylight were just starting to break over the city through his open window when Zuko woke. He wasn't normally up at this time, usually sleeping at least an hour further, but his body seemed insistent that he get up and move.</p><p> </p><p>He felt... off. Everything was too quiet, stillness seeping though everything around him, as if time itself had frozen. It was so silent he could hear his own heartbeat in his ears.</p><p> </p><p>He stepped from his room and made his way down the hall, and noticed that Izumi's door was open. Peering inside, he wasn't surprised to find the room empty, apparently she had risen early as well.</p><p> </p><p>With a thought, he brought a small flame into his hand to light the dim hallway as he made his way out, the crackle of flame a welcome break to the eerie quiet.</p><p> </p><p>He walked down towards the main hall, and could see light coming from the kitchens, hearing a laugh coming from inside. That was odd, the cooks were definitely not up yet. As he strode through the doorway, his confusion didn't lessen.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka, apparently the source of the laugh, stood next to the stove, stirring something that permeated the air of the room with rich sweetness.</p><p> </p><p>Perched on the counter beside him, was Izumi. Her small frame was nearly drowning in a large black robe, and a steaming mug sat comfortably in her hands.</p><p> </p><p>The robe must be Sokka's, and Zuko's brain abruptly shut off as he realized the warrior was shirtless.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi noticed him first, lifting a hand to give him a wave, and a quick, <em>“Hi, Uncle.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka followed the motion and turned around. “Oh! Morning Zuko.” He gestured to the pot with the wooden spoon in his hand. “Want some hot chocolate?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt very off-kilter. “I... sure? What is it?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka turned back to the stove, pouring a steaming brown liquid into another mug. “Something we make back home, mostly milk and chocolate with some spices. I think you'll like it.” He turned back to hand the cup over, and Zuko couldn't seem to stop himself from flicking his gaze down Sokka's bare torso. It shouldn't surprise him to find that the warrior had scars littered over a large portion of the warm brown skin. A rather large one bisected a spot just below his collar bone, thin lines etching away from it like silver veins.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko quickly averted his gaze, accepting the warm mug gratefully and taking a sip. A burst of sweet warmth flooded his tongue, and his eyes widened. “Oh, this is <em>good</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled. “Thank you. Not as good as my Grangran's, but it does the trick.” He turned the stove off and went about ladling the remaining beverage into a large jar.</p><p> </p><p>Curiosity finally won out on Zuko. “Is that why you are both up at this hour? If so, I'm a little disappointed I wasn't invited to early morning kitchen meetings if I've been missing out on this.” He glanced between the pair as a sudden tension filled the space.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka paused and looked to Izumi, apparently waiting for her to answer.</p><p> </p><p>She looked down at the mug in her hands for a moment longer, before setting it to the side so she could sign. <em>“I'm... having dreams again. Had a bad night. Woke up and came down here.”</em> She glanced at Sokka. <em>“He found me... helped me.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko's heart sunk at the words. He stepped closer to his niece, tilting her face up towards him. Now that he looked closely, he could see the puffiness around her eyes, and the dark circles beneath them.<em> “Izumi</em>.” She let loose a shaky breath at his soft tone. “Iz, why didn't you say anything? You could have woken me up, I wouldn't have minded.”</p><p> </p><p>She worried at her lip for a moment, before responding. <em>“I thought I could handle it. I'm older, I should be better at it.”</em> She looked down at her knees. <em>“I've been fighting with this for so long, it shouldn't be able to win anymore.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka's voice came from behind him, gentle but stern. “That isn't how it works, Princess. Things like this, you never escape them fully, you just get better at keeping them at bay.” He turned towards the pair of them, leaning against the counter. “Now, I can fight the exact same opponent, with the exact same skill set, every single day. Over time I am going to come out the victor more and more often, sometimes even for months or years at a time, but that doesn't mean that every once in a while I'm not going to <em>lose</em>.” He sighed heavily through his nose. “There's no shame in asking for some help Izumi, it happens to the best of us.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi flushed red, but nodded. She slid off the counter, landing lightly on her feet, before pulling the large robe off of her shoulders, offering it back to Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>He took it with a smile, throwing it back on himself. “You are more than welcome to wake me up as well. I'm always down for an excuse to cause some shenanigans.” He winked at her, and she snorted, shoving him lightly.</p><p> </p><p>She downed the last of her drink, setting it in the wash sink and made her way to the door. Zuko called after her as she went to cross the threshold.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Hey</em>.” She paused, turning with a raised eyebrow. “I love you.”</p><p> </p><p>He smiled as she scrunched her nose up, flustered, but she signed back. <em>“Love you too.” </em>And then she was gone, light footsteps echoing in the vacant halls.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko blew out his breath and turned to the other person occupying the space. “Sokka... I-”</p><p> </p><p>“If you are about to thank me, I'm going to throw this at you.” Sokka pointed his ladle towards him, mock threateningly. “My time is mine to give. I just wish I could help her more.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko looked into his own mug. “Me too.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't help but be distracted during his work that morning. The few official meetings the council had were all repeats, just a matter of finishing up some final paperwork for the most part. Without something of importance to concentrate on, his mind wandered freely.</p><p> </p><p>He couldn't seem to help all of his thoughts from coming back to Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>The man fit so seamlessly into their lives, it was like he was always meant to be there. Zuko had been unbelievably grateful for how Sokka had treated Izumi when they had met initially, but today... there was a point where simply being polite stopped, and being a genuinely good person began. Sokka had apparently bounded past both without hesitation.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko already knew it was too late to stop his runaway heart, today had simply carved it in stone.</p><p> </p><p>He was so thoroughly engrossed in his own thoughts, he barely registered that Tai was speaking to him.</p><p> </p><p>Apparently the meeting was over, almost everyone had packed up and left already.</p><p> </p><p>He flushed with embarrassment. “Sorry! Sorry, I didn't mean to daydream, would you repeat that?”</p><p> </p><p>The elderly man raised an eyebrow but didn't seem bothered. “Not a problem. I wanted to bring a certain water tribe tradition to your attention. There is a feast of sorts that is due to happen in a few weeks, on the next full moon. I thought it might be a nice gesture to welcome our new Abassador if we arranged something to celebrate it here.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh! Well, I don't see why we couldn't.” Zuko frowned. “I'm afraid I don't know much about their festivals and the like, do you know any details we would need to cover?”</p><p> </p><p>“I know most of the important parts, yes. I believe there are some accounts down in the library if you want to look, or I suppose I can ask Sokka as well.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko considered for a moment. “I have the afternoon free, I will go down and do some research. Feel free to arrange anything you like, Tai. I trust your judgment.”</p><p> </p><p>He smiled gently. “Thank you. I will see what I can pull up by tomorrow.”</p><p> </p><p>As he left, Zuko packed his things up, before making his own way home.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka hadn't seen Zuko since they finished with the council at midday. While the prince did often have other duties to attend afterwards, it was unlike him to skip dinner with everyone.</p><p> </p><p>When he had asked Izumi, she shrugged and signed, <em>“Suki said he went to the library earlier, he has a habit of getting lost in books sometimes.”</em></p><p> </p><p>So Sokka trekked through the massive palace. He didn't know where the library was, but he knew he could find it if Zuko was indeed there.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually, he found his way down an old corridor, where recent footsteps had carved a path through dust. A large ornate door had been left ajar, and Sokka could hear the crackle of a small fire from inside.</p><p> </p><p>He poked his head in to investigate, and had to stifle a laugh.</p><p> </p><p>The absentee Firelord was curled up on a couch next to a small hearth. He looked to be thoroughly engrossed in a large tome, with a stack of other books piled up beside him. Zuko seemed so peaceful and untroubled, Sokka was loathe to disturb him, but he cleared his throat and rapped his knuckles lightly on the door frame.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes shot to him as he startled, going from shock to confusion in a span of a second. “Sokka? What are you doing here?” He sat up slowly, bringing his knees closer to his chest, open book still clutched in his hand.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed, leaning against the wall. “I could ask you the same thing.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko frowned. “Did we have an appointment in the afternoon? Sorry, I didn't think I would be missed for a couple of hours.”</p><p> </p><p>“Afternoon?” Sokka raised an eyebrow in amusement. “Zuko you missed dinner... and it's nearly <em>midnight</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“I... <em>what</em>?” Zuko gaped at him, his face taking on a pink hue as he looked away. “Oh! I... oh. Apparently I lost track of the time. I'm sorry you had to come looking for me.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka waved him off. “Don't apologize, I just wanted to make sure you weren't trapped in a room somewhere, you never know with palaces as old as this one.” He smiled and walked over to the couch, sitting down beside him. “So, what are you reading that occupied you so thoroughly?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko seemed to suddenly remember that he was holding a book, and glanced down. “Oh I... well. Tai mentioned that there was an important Water Tribe event coming up, and I kind of realized that I'm a bit ignorant when it comes to your culture.” He rubbed a sheepish hand down his neck and yawned. “I came down here to try and learn a bit about it, and I sort of fell down a research hole.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka raised an eyebrow. “You are talking about the blue moon coming up? The Hunter's Moon Feast?”</p><p> </p><p>“Is that what its called? I could hardly find anything about it.” Zuko frowned, gesturing to the pile of books and documents beside him. “Not that I had much to begin with, these must be somewhat recent additions to the library. Any previous history that existed when my father ruled was likely destroyed.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka softened, oddly touched by Zuko's attempt, and nodded. “It is, yes. Though it isn't well documented even by us, it's too rare. I'm surprised Tai knew about it at all, but he did say he spent time with my people before. It only happens once a decade, at most, and only on blue moons, that's why it's special.” He poked Zuko's shin. “You could have just asked, you know.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed, “I know, I just- well you've been here for a while now, and I felt pretty bad that I hadn't bothered to educate myself on any of this stuff.” He glanced down at what he had been reading when Sokka had found him. “Since you're here now though, could I ask you about this?” He straightened and turned sideways, putting them shoulder to shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka looked down at the large book in his hands, and his heart stuttered in his chest when he recognized it instantly.</p><p> </p><p>“I don't think this has much bearing on the research I was trying to do, but the stories and legends in here are pretty captivating. The illustrations are beautiful as well, this one in particular seems to be the odd one out though, there is no story to go with it?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko passed it over to him, and Sokka knew without looking what page it would be turned to.</p><p> </p><p>Tui and La. Moon and Ocean. Wrapped around each other in the endless push and pull. Not an odd image in any Water Tribe folklore, but this particular one featured pale Tui, the moon goddess and spirit, casting her eyes away from the water to look down upon her people. In her hands she seemed to hold contained moonlight that fragmented and split down onto the world in small shards.</p><p> </p><p>Quietly, he said, “This is a depiction of Tui and her chosen protectors. It is a very old story, not many people know it, but my mother would tell it to us sometimes.” Which was true, if only in part.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko leaned into his side, not quite touching him but close enough to feel his warmth. His weariness was evident in his voice, but he seemed in no rush to leave. “Do you remember it well enough to tell it to me?”</p><p> </p><p>He could say no. He <em>should</em> say no.</p><p> </p><p>He let his fingers follow some of the lines of the intricate artwork.</p><p> </p><p>“Tui is said to bless certain children, born under her light. That every once in a while, she would choose a champion, to be her devoted guardian. Sometimes more than one. She granted them strength and abilities to assist them, as such. In the lore they are... heroes, of a sort. This image is of a few receiving her blessing.” It was, but it wasn't all it showed. Look too closely, turn it sideways, and you could see the other half of the equation. Push and pull.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko didn't seem to notice his unease. “Do you know any stories of the protectors? There must be some if they were considered heroes.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka did, and it was a mildly safer topic, so he was happy to indulge the prince.</p><p> </p><p>He started by telling him about one of the first, Amalis, and her hunt across the seas to fall a mighty eagle to please her goddess. Of Marakol, the watcher, bound to the cliffs of the seaside to guide sailors home in a storm.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko never interrupted, seemingly captivated by the tales of old warriors.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka continued, voice low, as he went through every one that he knew off hand. He wasn't sure how much time had passed, but he hadn't even noticed the dozing prince until the weight of him suddenly slumped into his side. When he turned to look, Zuko had his eyes closed, breathing evenly against Sokka's arm.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka quirked his mouth in amusement. This family and their <em>sleeping habits</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Carefully, he closed the book and placed it on top of the stack of the others. He flicked his gaze back down to Zuko.</p><p> </p><p>He should wake him up.</p><p> </p><p>Inhaling deeply, he brushed some of Zuko's stray hair back from where it had fallen over his face.</p><p> </p><p>This was dangerous. He should <em>wake him up</em>.</p><p> </p><p>As gently as he could, he maneuvered himself around until he could slide a hand under Zuko's legs, and another around his shoulders, hoisting him up in one fluid motion. Zuko was muscular enough to be fairly heavy, but Sokka didn't care. He savored the weight of him, the <em>realness</em>, of him in his arms.</p><p> </p><p>He slowly made his way out of the room and down the hall, careful with his steps to keep from jostling the sleeping prince. His walk through the palace was near silent, except for the quiet tap of his feet against the stone.</p><p> </p><p>When he neared Zuko's wing, Sokka noticed soft footsteps fall in behind him. He didn't have to turn around to know that it was Suki. She said nothing, just quietly tailed him until he made it to Zuko's door, then she stepped ahead of it to open it for him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had never been in here before, but he didn't take time to snoop, simply made his way to the large bed, placing Zuko down and carefully extricating his arms.</p><p> </p><p>He allowed himself one last look at the sleeping man, before turning to leave, closing the door behind him.</p><p> </p><p>Suki was still waiting for him in the hallway, and she walked with him as he made his way to his own rooms.</p><p> </p><p>As soon as they entered, he strode out to his balcony, which seemed to be the place he frequented most in his whole wing. Suki followed him out, standing beside him as he gazed into the night sky.</p><p> </p><p>“I see your resolve lasted long.” She said, airily, breaking the quiet.</p><p> </p><p>He sent her a hard look. “I don't require your judgment, thanks.”</p><p> </p><p>“Sokka. I'm not judging you.” She sighed, coming up to rest a hand on his forearm. “I'm saying you might want to put some consideration into telling him.”</p><p> </p><p>He stared, steely, at his hands. “It's not that easy. You, of all people, know that its not.” She stiffened beside him.</p><p> </p><p>“Zuko and I are not the same. I had my reasons for leaving, and you are well aware of what they are.”</p><p> </p><p>He couldn't seem to stop himself from snapping at her. “I do know that. As does she, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. That doesn't mean that she no longer loves you. That she would ever stop loving you, no matter what distance is put between you both.” Suki sucked in a breath beside him, and he blew his own out. “I'm sorry Suki, that was unfair. But you understand why... why I'm scared.”</p><p> </p><p>She said nothing for a moment, seeming to collect herself. “Nothing easy, or good, has ever come to Zuko without him clawing and fighting for every inch. You are right, he is an incredible person, but so are you. I think he deserves to know. And, unfortunately for him, I think he deserves you. <em>All</em> of you.”</p><p> </p><p>She paused again, before giving him a small smirk. “At the very least, could you please act like a normal functioning person, and ask the pining idiot on a date? If I have to keep watching him make doe eyes at you I'm going to barf in the middle of a council meeting one of these days.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka flushed hot. “Do you... do you think he would say yes?”</p><p> </p><p>Suki considered for a moment. “Knowing him, I think he would probably have a world class breakdown about it first, Zuko isn't exactly used to being wanted. But yes, I think he would.” She turned to mirror his pose on the railing. “As for the other, he's smart, Sokka. Whether or not you want him to know, he will eventually figure it out if you are hiding something, and there is nothing Zuko hates more than being lied to.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded. “I already slipped up once. When we sparred, he caught me by surprise and I felt him before I could stop myself. I'm sure he noticed, but I'm hoping he thinks it was just a fluke. I know he tried again, later. I won't be able to hide it forever, not being so close to him.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki rocked on her heels. “I haven't tried. Not since I left. It seemed... cruel, to reach out.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka shook his head. “I understand why you would think that, but whether she feels you or not, doesn't change the fact that you will always be on her mind regardless.”</p><p> </p><p>This time she didn't respond, and the sentinel seemed to fold in on herself slightly, before straightening to her full height beside him. Her light footsteps sounded against the night air as she retreated back to his door, and he heard the soft click of the latch as it shut behind her.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gazed out at the near silent city, the late hour folding it into near pitch darkness except for the mild light coming from the start of a new moon.</p><p> </p><p>He didn't move for a long time.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Under the cover of dark, a woman with graying hair carefully pulled an old trunk out from beneath her bed. The rusty latch had long since been broken, and she flipped the lid to remove the contents.</p><p> </p><p>An old set of fire nation armour rested in her hands, the high neck piece embossed in gold. The chest plate had the standard repeating pattern of golden flames against red metal. This one though, was unique, in that four large slashes had cut straight through, splitting the artwork and steel apart.</p><p> </p><p>She traced one of the gouge marks with a slim finger, and swore when a sharp fragment slit the pad of it. She watched the small bead of blood well up, and felt hot furious tears slide down her cheeks.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Suki curled up on her bed, tucked hard into the side against the wall. She stared at the neat, empty half beside her, and let out a shaky breath.</p><p> </p><p>Slowly, she unclenched her fist, laying her arm out in front of her and gazing at her wrist.</p><p> </p><p>She was probably asleep. She wouldn't know.</p><p> </p><p>She could just check.</p><p> </p><p>Suki took a deep breath, and let her mind drift, concentrating on the bond she knew was still there, even after all this time.</p><p> </p><p>Instantly she felt the cool calm race up her arm, leaving goosebumps in it's wake. She brought the hand to her chest, and felt the slower pulse of someone else, beating along beside her.</p><p> </p><p>Her eyes filled against her will, and she abruptly broke the connection, gasping as her tears began to fall.</p><p> </p><p>She curled around her hand, and cried until her exhaustion gave way to unconsciousness.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Oh boy, we are nearly half way there folks! This fic has a definitive ending, but since I keep rearranging and splitting chapters I can't give and exact amount quite yet. </p><p>I have a massive playlist for writing this story, and while most of it would be SUPER SPOILER HEAVY for like-minded people, the one for this chapter isn't. If anyone is interested, I listened to You Know Where To Find Me by Imogen Heap on loop for like... hours, while I wrote this chapter. </p><p>As always, thank you to my amazing commenters and kudos-ers. You are the best.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Of Surface Tension and Skill Sharing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>There is some past violence described in this chapter, while not super graphic in detail, some images might be a lot to handle. Read with care.</p><p>For some reason it uploaded with no italics -_- I will fix this later today when i'm not on mobile.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>Izumi stood upon the ocean.</p><p><br/>The icy wind cut into her bare skin, howling through her as it tossed and tangled her hair behind her. The water beneath her bare feet was as still and solid as glass, inky black stillness stretching out in every direction.</p><p><br/>This was different.</p><p><br/>Something was moving. She couldn't see it, but she could feel the vibration of movement beneath her feet, slow and rumbling under the surface.</p><p><br/>In the distance, she could just see the barest hints of a silver shore, and she took one cautious step towards it on the ice.</p><p><br/>The second she moved, the surface began to split and crack beneath her. Cold fear shot up her spine and she broke into a run as the ice gave way, ocean water flooding up onto the surface and soaking her feet as she struggled to out pace it.</p><p><br/>She had only made a few panicked strides forwards before the water itself turned thick as tar around her ankle and she stumbled and fell, crashing hard into the frozen surface. She clawed desperately to grab any hand hold to pull herself free, but terror filled her as the weight around her leg tightened like a vice and hauled her into night-black water.</p><p><br/>She was going to die.</p><p><br/>She plummeted downwards, light and hope leaving her with every passing second.</p><p><br/>She was going to drown.</p><p><br/>Except she didn't. The frigid cold enveloped her and burned into her skin like fire, her lungs filling with glacial sea water, but they didn't demand she try to take a second breath. She knew with certainty then, that she was dreaming once more.</p><p><br/>Instead she was still, static, as she continued her seemingly endless descent. She closed her eyes tightly, hoping desperately to escape and wake herself, as her blood roared in her ears.</p><p><br/>The force pulling her downwards suddenly slowed, and her feet once more found purchase on... metal?</p><p><br/>Oh no.</p><p><br/>Something brushed past her overhead, massive enough to pull a current in it's wake.</p><p><br/>It must have lightly hit what she was standing on, because even through the water she could hear the dull thrum of hollow metal resonating around her.</p><p><br/>Like the hull of a ship.</p><p><br/>She curled down into herself, covering her closed eyes with her hands.</p><p>
  <em><br/>Please, I can't see this. Please don't make me see this.</em>
</p><p><br/>A voice, deep and so loud it boomed through the water, rattling in her skull.</p><p>
  <em><br/>You must see. You must understand.</em>
</p><p><br/>She ignored it, pressing her face into her knees and covering her ears this time.</p><p><br/>She felt the slightest touch of a hand on her shoulder, and <em>screamed</em>.</p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p>Izumi hurled herself off the side of her bed, coughing and choking on the floor as her mind remembered the feeling of ice filled lungs.</p><p><br/>She shivered hard, pain clenching her stomach as her body tried to reorient itself to being in a warm bedroom instead of the ocean floor.</p><p><br/>She could distantly hear pounding, and suddenly realized that it was coming from her door. She managed to open her eyes just before it was slammed open, revealing Zuko, face glowing from the small flame cupped in his palm.</p><p><br/>The second he laid eyes on her curled up form on the floor, he rushed forward, snuffing out the light and dragging her into his arms without hesitation. She went without a fight, digging her own hands into the cloth of his shirt.</p><p><br/>Quietly, he whispered, “I'm so sorry this happening to you Izzie. I hate that I can't help.”</p><p><br/>She wanted to say, <em>you do, you do, so much more than you think</em>, but her limbs refused to loosen their hold on him long enough to sign.</p><p><br/>He was not that much taller that she was, but she thought that his arms felt giant around her. Or maybe it was her, just feeling very small.</p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p>Breakfast was a quiet affair.</p><p><br/>Sokka had sensed the tension in the space before he had even sat down. He had hoped that perhaps the night before had just been a fluke, but he knew as soon as he saw her that whatever had invaded her sleep had done so once more.</p><p><br/>Zuko radiated quiet concern, and kept glancing at Izumi as she picked at her food, but said nothing. He met Sokka's eyes when he went to sit across from them, giving him a humourless smile and a quick greeting.</p><p><br/>Sokka studied the somber pair as he ate, sitting in near silence until he simply could not take the gloomy atmosphere in the room for one more second. He snagged a couple of rolls off his plate, reaching across to drop them neatly onto Izumi's.</p><p><br/>She shot him an annoyed look. He pointed his chopsticks at her. “A warrior princess like you doesn't skip meals. Eat.”</p><p><br/>She looked down at her plate, frowning. <em>“I am not a warrior.</em>”</p><p><br/>Sokka cocked his head to the side, and grinned as he suddenly got an idea. “Would you like to change that?”</p><p><br/>Two sets of matching gold eyes stared at him then. He laughed and tapped a finger against his lips lightly as he thought for a moment. “Hmm. I wonder what would best suit you though... you are pretty light, maybe a bo staff? Not my specialty but I could show you the basics at least.”</p><p><br/>Izumi's mouth hung open as she stared wide-eyed.</p><p><br/>Zuko caught the ball though and smiled brilliantly at Sokka. “There is a cache of practice weapons in the storage room by the courtyard, feel free to use whatever you like.”</p><p><br/>She was still gaping at him like a fish.<em> “You would... you would teach me?”</em></p><p><br/>“Happily. On one condition.” He smirked and pointed once more to her plate. “<em>Eat</em>.”</p><p><br/>She didn't even hesitate before grabbing one of the rolls and ripping a piece off with her teeth.</p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was amazed.</p><p><br/>He felt like he should just resign himself to having this as his new normal, seeing how the last month had gone.</p><p><br/>Sokka seemed to have an uncanny ability to observe a situation and flip it entirely. Zuko remembered what Iroh had said about his skill at pai sho, and had no doubt that it was the truth.</p><p><br/>Izumi had bolted up to her room to change, so Zuko lead the way out into the courtyard, ducking into one of the outbuildings with Sokka trailing behind him.</p><p><br/>He gestured to the somewhat dusty weapons racks, filled with assortments from all disciplines. “Help yourself.”</p><p><br/>Sokka sent him a pleased look, and started to comb the various stacks, picking a few he apparently deemed workable.</p><p><br/>Since they were alone for the moment, Zuko broached the subject that had been on his mind since he had first woken that morning. “So... for the sake of my dignity I'm going to pretend I walked to my bedroom last night.”</p><p><br/>Sokka huffed a laugh, back still turned to him. “As you wish.”</p><p><br/>Zuko scuffed his foot along the stone floor, feeling heat rise in his face. “Thank you, for indulging me. Those stories were so interesting, and I definitely didn't mean to fall asleep, but you could've woken me up.”</p><p><br/>Sokka turned then, arms full. He regarded Zuko with an unreadable expression in his stormy eyes. “Could have. Didn't want to.”</p><p><br/>That was apparently the end of the conversation, because Sokka nudged him with his shoulder to get him moving back outside. Izumi was trotting down the stone steps towards them, tying her hair back in a high ponytail as she went.</p><p><br/>She beamed as Sokka handed her a couple of staffs to test the weight, and Zuko couldn't help the rush of relief and fondness that flooded him at the change in her from earlier in the morning.</p><p><br/>He sat down on one of the stone benches to watch as Sokka began to lead her through some forms. It was oddly meditative from an outside view, the pair of them slowly moving in sync like a pair of half speed dancers.</p><p><br/>Sokka was a kind teacher, but stern. He used the butt end of his own staff to tap her shoulder or her heel to get her to correct her stance, but his voice remained low and calm, unhurried.</p><p><br/>Within the span of an hour, she had worked up a fair sweat, red-faced from exertion. Sokka called it soon after, citing that she needed enough time to get cleaned up before she had to head to class for the day.</p><p><br/>Izumi handed her staff back to him, and as soon as her hands were freed she asked, <em>“Can we do that again?”</em></p><p><br/>Sokka smiled and gave her a wink, tossing her staff into the air with a small flourish and catching it on his fingertips, balancing it like circus sword. “Anytime you want.”</p><p><br/>She smiled back, giving him a quick bow before signing <em>thank you</em>, and jogging back to the palace to get ready, practically bouncing her way inside.</p><p><br/>Sokka made his way over to Zuko and sat with a sigh beside him, leaning back on his elbows to tip his face towards the sun. “So, do you have a weapon of choice?” He turned his head to the side slightly to look at Zuko with one eye. “Other than the obvious I mean.”</p><p><br/>Zuko laughed. “With the obvious one being firebending or Suki? They are equally deadly most days.” He pulled up his legs to sit cross legged on the bench, stretching his back with a wince as it popped a couple of times after being still for so long. “I have some skill with dao blades.”</p><p><br/>Sokka turned around fully, straddling the bench and raising an eyebrow in amusement. “Which is Zuko-speak for 'I am a fucking dual wielding badass and could cut a man to ribbons with hardly any effort'.” He smirked at Zuko's bemused expression. “See I'm getting better at this now, I know when you are trying to be polite. Dao blades are notoriously difficult. I tried my hand at them a couple of times, but I'm not ambidextrous so the balance never felt right. I stick to my long sword, among other things.”</p><p><br/>Zuko sighed, but conceded. “They certainly weren't easy to master, no. But I am out of practice, I haven't had the chance to use them in months, and even then it was just forms.” He gazed out into the arena, where he could still see the footprints in the sand from where they had been practising. “I know you will tell me not to say thank you, but I can't help but be grateful anyways. Izumi doesn't make friends easily.” He let out a small derisive laugh. “We have that in common actually. So... just thank you.”</p><p><br/>Sokka blew out his breath, but didn't argue. “You can tell me to shove it if this is too invasive, but do you have any idea what is going on with her? Is it just dreams, or?”</p><p><br/>Zuko sighed. “Honestly, I don't know. She had them when she was younger, off and on. I don't remember them ever being quite this bad, but I don't think I would have known if they were, back when Lu Ten was alive.”</p><p><br/>“What happened to him? I know he died as a soldier, but I don't know any of the specifics.”</p><p><br/>“We... don't really know. It was after the war, actually. We had received some intelligence about a force of Phoenix Loyalists heading north, and he had set out to try and intercept them. Whether he made it, and was outmatched, or was lost to something else, we don't know.”</p><p><br/>Sokka sat straighter. “Loyalists? You're talking about the insurgence of the Northern Water Tribe. About Zhao.”</p><p><br/>Zuko nodded. “We had been hunting him for years at that point. And as risky as it was to try and head him off, for Lu Ten, it was personal. When Zhao initially fled the fire nation, he stole a ship from the royal fleet, and slaughtered everyone on board.” Zuko paused for a moment, looking skyward. “It was Kaleen's ship, Lu's wife. She had just brought it into port for shore leave, so she could give birth to her baby at home.”</p><p><br/>Sokka froze beside him. “Izumi?”</p><p><br/>Zuko nodded again. “Zhao would never have been a match for Kaleen normally, and he did not truly best her in the end. He threw her overboard. By the time she managed to get back to the port, she had lost too much blood. She knew she was dying, so she demanded that her daughter be cut from her to save her.” Zuko swallowed, thickly. He could hear her, still, screams echoing even as Lu Ten clutched his dying wife to him in agony. “She died on the docks.” His voice gave out then, and he blinked quickly, trying to stave off tears.</p><p><br/>Fingers brushed his damp cheek for a moment before he was hauled into Sokka's arms. The tight embrace seemed to open the floodgate and Zuko buried his face in Sokka's chest as his hands gripped the back of his shirt tightly. “I miss them, Sokka. They were good people, the best of our family. They didn't deserve the fallout of my father's legacy.”</p><p><br/>Sokka's voice was low and rumbling beside his ear. “No they didn't. Neither did you.” Zuko felt gentle fingers card through his hair. “I don't know if it is any comfort, but I watched Zhao meet a fitting end in the north. I was Yue's guard at the time.”</p><p><br/>It shouldn't be comforting, but Zuko would be lying if he said otherwise. He took a deep breath, trying to get his frayed emotions under control. “I'm starting to think I might be doomed to constantly embarrass myself in front of you.” He pulled back slowly, wiping a hand over his eyes. “Apologies.”</p><p><br/>A hand gripped his chin, forcing him to meet the stormy gaze. “Grief isn't embarrassing Zuko. You have every right to be upset. About this as well as everything else. Life has not been overly kind to you.”</p><p><br/>Zuko let out a hollow laugh. “Yes, I suppose that's one way to put it.” He blew out a breath. “I just can't help thinking that I'm letting them down. Every time something like this happens with Izzie, and I don't know what to do or how to help, I always think that they would have had the answers.”</p><p><br/>“Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe they would've been at a loss as well. Regardless, I think they would be at peace, knowing you love her as you do. It's worth more than you think, to know that she would be safe.”</p><p><br/>Zuko didn't answer, not trusting his voice once more.</p><p><br/>Sokka tangled their fingers and stood, pulling Zuko up with him. “Unfortunately, we have official business to deal with today, probably within the hour and I am still fairly gross from that workout. Put this conversation on hold for the moment, I have more to say later.”</p><p><br/>Zuko nodded. “Okay.” He went to let go of his hand, but Sokka held it tighter for a moment.</p><p><br/>“You're amazing, you know that?”</p><p><br/>Zuko huffed. “So you keep saying.”</p><p><br/>“I will until you actually believe me.” He pulled Zuko closer, brushing a ghost of a kiss on his temple, before letting him go and turning to head into the palace.</p><p><br/>Zuko stood dumbstruck in the sand, and watched him leave.</p><p><br/>He resisted the urge to touch his scarred cheek, as the tingling sensation of lips gradually dispersed into nothingness once more.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Whoo this was a lot of exposition to get out. Reminder that I have ripped apart and changed timelines from ATLA. One of the main ones being that Lu Ten is closer to Zuko in age.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Of Blades and Bravery</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*<br/>~Points to changed Explicit rating~</p><p>Anyway, here's wonderwall.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>The following day quickly grew busy, as Tai set the plans he had organized for the moon festival before the council.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had made an attempt at saying it wasn't necessary to do this for him but he was quickly shot down by the other advisors. Most of which claiming the need for more understanding of other cultures, as well as genuinely wanting to give Sokka a proper welcome in gratitude for all he had accomplished alongside them.</p><p> </p><p>Azir, well known for loving any excuse to throw a party, was one of the most vocal. “Nonsense! Hunting is not exactly common in the middle of the city, but we are certainly capable of throwing a feast.” He drew his glasses up his ruddy nose with a thoughtful look on his round face. “I can't think of a single bit of clothing I own that is <em>blue </em>though.” He stood up abruptly, sweeping his work into his arms. “This requires a trip to the shops!” Azir strode directly back out of the chamber, humming cheerily as he went.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka threw his hands up in defeat and called after him. “You don't have to wear blue!”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko highly doubted Azir cared, even if he did hear him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gestured vaguely at the rest of the council. “I want it on the record that <em>none of you</em> have to wear to blue for this, though I somehow feel like I'm wasting my words. This is mostly a feast and some dancing, and I will be slightly horrified if you all arrive looking like Water Tribe royalty.”</p><p> </p><p>A smattering of laughter sounded around the room, but they fully ignored Sokka's exasperation and moved on to discuss different options for what could be considered a 'hunt-able' meal.</p><p> </p><p>As they spoke, Tai handed Zuko a list of names for possible invitations. Mostly local nobles and friends of the council, as well as a few merchants who traded heavily with the Water Tribes. “I hope you don't mind opening the palace foregrounds for this event? There are more people than I had initially thought wanting to come.” Tai scratched at his forearm through his robes. “We can certainly add a heavier guard detail as well.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled. “I don't mind, it has been some time since we had a decent festival on the grounds.” He sighed. “As for the guards, yes that is probably a good idea. I like to think we've moved past the point of extreme danger, but...”</p><p> </p><p>Tai nodded. “For peace of mind then.” He looked through the lists once more. “Is there anyone you would like to add to this?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, there are some. I will give you a list by this afternoon.” He already had a few in mind, foremost a young boy and his mother from the market. “Ask the rest of the council as well, I'm happy to accommodate within reason.” Zuko took the lists to add to his pile of paperwork as the meeting came to a close. Or, more accurately, the council began to follow Azir's lead, and focused their attention on getting items and clothing ordered.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka walked up to them as the other advisors began to file out. “I wanted to thank you, Tai. I hope I didn't sound ungrateful for your work. I am looking forward to this, I'm just not overly fond of being fussed over.”</p><p> </p><p>The elderly man smiled gently, patting Sokka on the arm. “No thanks necessary. I would be lying if I said this wasn't partially selfish on my end, it has been a very long time since I experienced any of this, and truth be told, I miss it dearly.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes widened. “You've been to this feast before?”</p><p> </p><p>Tai nodded. “Yes, an age ago nearly. I was a simple clerk then, working for a geologist that was studying underwater volcanoes at the pole.” He laughed. “It was an <em>awful</em> job. I did, however, very much enjoy my free time with your people.”</p><p> </p><p>He stood and packed up his own things, before turning and tapping a finger on the stack of paper on Zuko's desk. “Don't work too hard on that today, we have a couple of weeks to finish preparations, invites can be sent next week.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko resisted rolling his eyes as the councilman left, leaving just the pair of them in the room.</p><p> </p><p>“He is right you know.” Sokka leaned a hip against his desk, motioning to the same pile Tai had. “We have the entire day off tomorrow, I can help you tackle it then.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's brows knit together. “That isn't necessary, I don't want you to waste your free time with my work.”</p><p> </p><p>Stormy eyes glinted, narrowing at him. “And I don't want you to exhaust yourself for no reason. If I have to lock you out of your study I absolutely will.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sent him a dry look, but didn't reply.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka seemed to take it as a win. “That aside, I'm heading into town to run an errand today, do you need anything while I'm there?”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, um... no I don't think so? Thank you though.” Zuko stretched and diligently organized all of his work, packing his things away.</p><p> </p><p>“See you at dinner then.” Sokka gave him an assessing look before turning and making his way out of the room.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't help but watch him as he left.</p><p> </p><p>He wondered if he would look good in blue.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko was a baseline stubborn creature, predictably so.</p><p> </p><p>He knew this.</p><p> </p><p>That didn't stop him from grabbing tea and a few snacks to take with him to his study so he could hole up there for the afternoon.</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't grueling work by any stretch, just time consuming. Names and invitations to be written, lists of family and friends to be organized, and transport to be arranged. Nothing he hadn't done countless times before.</p><p> </p><p>By the time the sun was setting outside of his window, he had managed to knock out a fairly sizable chunk of the stack. He shifted sideways for a moment to take a sip of his now cooled tea, when a pointed throat clearing came from his door.</p><p> </p><p>His eyes shot up to Sokka, leaning against the frame with his arms crossed. “I see you take instruction well.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko froze, mug halfway to his mouth. He slowly put it back down as he felt blood rush to his ears. “In my defence, I got a lot done.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka, unimpressed, fixed him with a glare. “Should I assume that it couldn't have waited until tomorrow like I asked?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed. “I don't like leaving things undone. I would rather have the bulk of it finished today, and not have to worry about it later.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingertips.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko made a small attempt at humour. “Are you here to drag me out and lock the door?”</p><p> </p><p>The warrior blew out a breath. “I'm hoping it won't come to that.” He shifted, reaching for something behind him. “I would ask for you to indulge me instead.”</p><p> </p><p>Before Zuko could pose the question, Sokka strode into the room and handed him a neatly tied package. As soon as the weight hit his hands, he knew what it was. “<em>Sokka</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Impatient, Sokka just stood and gestured for him to continue.</p><p> </p><p>Thoroughly thrown off, he slowly released the tied ribbon, and it slipped neatly with the tissue paper off of a jet black scabbard with gold embossed inlays. Zuko sucked in a breath, using his thumb to release one of the swords from the dual sheath. The sound of sharp metal rang through the quiet space, making the hairs on the back of Zuko's neck stand up.</p><p> </p><p>His eyes shot to Sokka, bewildered. “I can't- Sokka I can't accept this.” The blade shone in the candlelight, glinting and deadly. “They're beautiful, they must have cost a fortune.” He slid the sword home, going to hand them back, but Sokka gripped over top of his hand and gently pushed them back towards his own chest.</p><p> </p><p>“There is a poem somewhere that says 'beautiful blades deserve to be wielded by the worthy'.” He smiled, softening. “Knowing what I do about you, I think they would be pleased to fall into your hands.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko swallowed hard, speechless, and ran his thumb over one of the silk wrapped handles.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled, his expression promising mischief. “So, care to take them for a spin?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised his eyebrows. “Now?” It was late evening, everyone would be starting to head to their respective chambers to sleep, but Zuko felt more awake than he had in days, itching to test out this gift.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka must have seen the answer in his eyes, because he grinned wider, offering his hand to pull Zuko up. “C'mon.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka always seemed different at night. As if he was somehow <em>more</em>. It was something Zuko had begun to notice as he grew more familiar with him. He was always beautiful, distractingly so, but each evening as the sun set earlier in the coming winter, the twilight shadows would cling to him like velvet, light eyes near glowing like distant starlight.</p><p> </p><p>Tonight was different, Zuko could feel it like electricity along his skin.</p><p> </p><p>As they made their way down to the empty courtyard, he sent out fire to light a few braziers on the outskirts, illuminating the space with a dim glow. When Sokka turned to face him, stunning and near god-like in dancing firelight, Zuko was struck breathless.</p><p> </p><p>He wanted him.</p><p> </p><p>And not just in a small way. Zuko wasn't like this, normally. He had dated some beautiful people when he was younger, had even taken some to his bed, but he had never in his life felt like this. Like he wanted to tear his way inside of Sokka's chest and call it home.</p><p> </p><p>And now he had to <em>spar</em> with him.</p><p> </p><p>Fuck.</p><p> </p><p>He didn't know what expression showed on his own face, but Sokka regarded him strangely as he strapped an odd metal guard to his offside forearm. “If you would rather, we can use practice weapons this time. I won't be offended.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko straightened. “No, I'm sorry, it's just been a while.” He unsheathed both swords and gave them quick flourish, feeling the immediate rightness of properly weighted blades. He sent Sokka a quick smile. “I trust you.”</p><p> </p><p>Something soft and pleased passed over Sokka's face as he readied himself, dark blade near melding with the night, only visible from the fire glinting off it. “Slow to start then.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded, taking a deep steadying breath, falling into a stance that his muscles remembered faster than he did.</p><p> </p><p>He struck first this time, impatient to relive the feel of a rarely used skill, swinging both swords in an arc towards Sokka's guard side. The crack of metal on metal rang through the yard as Sokka split his blades, one hitting his guard, the other flying wide as it crossed with the long-sword.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko saw it coming, and drove a foot high into Sokka's stomach, sending him stumbling backwards.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned, undeterred as he caught a sharp breath. “Good, again.” He took a quick stride forward, slicing his sword downwards. Easy enough to block, but as Zuko crossed his blades to catch it, Sokka dropped his body lower, snaking his leg around the back of Zuko's, forcing the hit to knock him off balance.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko caught himself, just barely, using the pommel of one of his own swords to hook over Sokka's shoulder and keep him upright. The pull dragged them closer, and Zuko could feel the heat of the other man leech through his clothes for a moment before Sokka's guarded hand slammed up and knocked his grip free with a bang.</p><p> </p><p>They went on like that for a few minutes, moving faster and faster as Zuko grew more comfortable with the swords, and with his own control.</p><p> </p><p>The harder they went at each other, the more his muscles burned, and even in the cool night air he was quickly overheating. He backed away for a moment, moving both swords to one hand and holding up the other to pause. “Hang on.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka slung his sword up to his shoulder, watching him carefully. “Are you okay?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled. “Yes, just roasting. I am not exactly dressed for this.” He quickly sheathed his swords and slipped a few layers off of his shoulders, tossing them to the side. “That's better.” He turned back to Sokka, now only with a simple black undershirt remaining.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes followed the movement as he stretched for second before removing his blades from their holster once more. Zuko thought he saw a hint of something like want in the heated gaze.</p><p> </p><p>That was interesting.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's voice cut through the space, yanking Zuko out of his wishful thinking. “Care to wager? First to disarm?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised a brow. “At what stakes?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smirked. “Whatever you want. I have a few ideas in contention, but I think if I win I'm going to demand that you hand over all your paperwork to me, for the next three days.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gawked at him. “Doing my work for me is hardly a prize!”</p><p> </p><p>A finger was pointed at him as Sokka cut him with an annoyed look. “It's the principle of the thing. You work too hard sometimes, and it drives me nuts.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't help but roll his eyes in exasperation. “Fine. I don't agree, but fine.”</p><p> </p><p>“And you? What do you want?”</p><p> </p><p>Too much. Everything.</p><p> </p><p>“I will decide that if I win. I have one idea.” He had many, but only one of them might actually be attainable.</p><p> </p><p>He hoped Sokka would say yes, if he asked him to share more stories with him.</p><p> </p><p>Curiosity flitted through the warrior's eyes, but he didn't pry. “As you wish.” He dropped into a ready position once more.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko mirrored him, only for a bare second before he sprinted forwards, aiming a kick high towards Sokka's shoulder, blocked and knocked back by his guard. The longsword followed him, slicing down towards his side but he deflected it away easily.</p><p> </p><p>They were getting good at this, and Zuko felt his trust grow with every passing second as sharp hits that would have connected were tipped sideways at the last second so the flat of blades struck instead. The fog of their heavy breaths was illuminated by the surrounding firelight, as they whirled faster and faster together.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka took a hard strike straight down, and Zuko once more caught it in a cross, but this time he fell back when Sokka simultaneously swept his feet with a hard kick. He slammed onto his back, forcing his block higher as Sokka followed his momentum downwards, sword stabbing into the sand above his shoulder. Eyes wide, Zuko curled tight, shoving his knee into Sokka's stomach and wrapping his other thigh around his waist to continue the roll, sending the warrior toppling over his head.</p><p> </p><p>He shot up and wiped the back of his hand over his mouth, dimly aware that he had bit his lip in the fall. Sokka flipped up onto his toes as well, breathing heavy, eyes blown wide. He looked like he wanted to eat Zuko alive.</p><p> </p><p>So, maybe it wasn't his imagination.</p><p> </p><p>And maybe, well. That was one way to win this.</p><p> </p><p>All bets were off. Zuko slammed his blades towards Sokka with no hesitation, and the warrior responded in kind, blocking and dodging with incredible agility. Metal on metal rang around them as they went, and Zuko's blood sang every time their bodies collided, skin connecting and sliding past.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was quickly becoming turned on beyond sense, and he would have to end this soon if he was going to have any hope in maintaining some dignity, but Sokka did not look much better off, red-flushed and panting.</p><p> </p><p>His blade hit the guard again, and Sokka threw his forearm into the hit, forcing one of Zuko's swords upwards, rattling his knuckles before flying free from his grip, landing somewhere behind him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko ducked as Sokka swung wide at him. He wouldn't last long against Sokka with only one weapon, so he threw himself forward in a last ditch effort, slamming the pommel of his remaining blade hard into the wrist gripping the long-sword. Using Sokka's own trick from earlier, he wrapped his leg around the back of the warrior's hip, using his now free hand to shove him backwards as hard as he could. Sokka fell hard, shock colouring his face as his sword went flying behind him at the impact.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko followed him down, landing hard on his knees as he straddled Sokka's waist. His remaining blade barely touched the skin of his throat, his other hand splayed against Sokka's stomach to brace himself.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka froze in place, panting hard. His whole body was tense beneath Zuko, but his eyes were amazed, and unafraid.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko stared back, eyes wide. He barely believed he had actually come out the victor. His breathing was just as heavy, every exhale fogging the cool night air.</p><p> </p><p>Even in the dim firelight Zuko could see the strong pulse jumping lightly in Sokka's neck.</p><p> </p><p>He wanted to dig his teeth into it.</p><p> </p><p>Slowly, carefully, he shifted the blade to the side, past Sokka's jaw and into the sand beside his head. He slid his other hand slowly upward, letting it rest against the frantic pounding of Sokka's heart. As soon as he did he felt the heady beat of it again, racing up into his own veins like wildfire. He sucked in a shocky breath, digging his fingers in hard.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes darkened and his chest pushed into Zuko's hand when he inhaled sharply. “<em>Zuko</em>.” It was a warning. It was a question.</p><p> </p><p>Brave with want, Zuko went for broke, hoarse words falling out of his mouth before could even think to stop himself. “I'm not good at this. If I'm reading this all wrong, or you don't want-”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko lost the rest of it as Sokka surged up from beneath him, sliding a hand to his cheek as he hauled him into a bruising kiss. Zuko melted into him, relief and need flooding through him in waves as he tangled his own free hand Sokka's hair, tilting his head for a better angle.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt his soul ignite.</p><p> </p><p>The warrior kissed like he fought, goading Zuko with nips and swipes of his tongue, making him desperate for more with every passing second. His breath was hot and heavy, heart thudding hard, and he could feel Sokka in a similar state with the hand that remained firmly planted on his chest.</p><p> </p><p>He tightened his fingers in the messy wolf tail and pulled them apart for a moment, watching Sokka's eyes snap open, dark and dangerous. His lips were flushed blood red and shining, and Zuko felt heat lick down his spine. He had never wanted anything more.</p><p> </p><p>The warrior seemed to share his thoughts, because he gripped Zuko's neck and hauled him back to his lips, this time biting his way in and sliding his tongue against Zuko's as if he wanted to taste every inch of him.</p><p> </p><p>A hand slid up Zuko's thigh, tightening around his hip and pulling their bodies flush together. He could feel Sokka, hard against him, and Zuko gasped into the kiss appreciatively at the contact. He wasn't in much better shape himself, the laced cloth of his pants was quickly becoming constricting. He rolled his hips down, slow and purposeful, and was rewarded with Sokka hissing into his mouth, breaking off and dragging his teeth across Zuko's jaw.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko scraped blunt nails down the back of Sokka's neck, as the warrior nipped his way down his throat, stopping to suck a mark into Zuko's own pulse point that was sure to bruise. He couldn't hold back a moan and threw his head back when the hand on his thigh slid further to the laces of his pants, deftly undoing them before slipping inside.</p><p> </p><p>“Fuck, <em>Sokka</em>.” Zuko whined as a hot hand stroked him root to tip, rocking into the pressure. He had never felt like this, not with anyone, desperate and frenzied past the point of sense. He felt like if they stopped touching now, he would simply shatter like glass.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka rumbled appreciatively against his throat, as Zuko inadvertently ground against him with the movement of his hips.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko knew he was not going to last long at <em>all</em>, so he leaned back slightly, widening his thighs so he could get a hand far enough to shove Sokka's pants down as well. He circled the hard length, gently pulling him free, as Sokka sucked in a harsh breath against the hinge of his jaw.</p><p> </p><p>He was rewarded with Sokka rolling his hips upward, sliding both of their cocks into his own fist, stroking slow and hot. His other hand slid into Zuko's hair, turning his head to draw him to his lips once more.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko would've been embarrassed by the high thready sound that escaped him, but he was too far gone to care. Heat pooled like lava in his belly, and his body coiled tighter and tighter with each passing second as they rocked together.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka didn't seem that much better off, his breath coming ragged against Zuko's mouth in between kisses. He drew a leg up behind Zuko's back, and the angle changed just enough to bring them even closer, friction and heat edging just towards too much. One sharp nip to his already kiss-bruised lip and Zuko was gone, hurtling over the edge with a loud gasp. His vision whited out, and he was distantly aware that he was nearly clawing into Sokka's chest and back but he couldn't seem to stop himself.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's hips stuttered seconds later, hand tightening on the back of Zuko's neck as his release joined Zuko's on his hand and both of their stomachs. Zuko kissed him through it, unwilling to let it end even as Sokka gentled him, softly slowing until he pulled back enough for both of them to catch their breath.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stared at him, stormy eyes warmed with open affection. After a moment, a soft smile spread across his face. “You aren't reading it wrong.” He was panting, voice low and rumbling as he rested their foreheads together, nosing Zuko gently. “In case you were wondering.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko blew out an incredulous breath, trying to calm his raging heart. He moved his hand up from Sokka's chest to hold his cheek, stubble scraping against his palm. “Apparently not. That was... fuck Sokka, that was...” He trailed off, not really knowing how he could even describe what he was feeling.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned, wide and pleased against Zuko's mouth. “This might be a weird question to ask <em>now</em>, but could I, maybe, take you on a date?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised his eyebrows, bewildered for a moment before he burst into laughter, throwing his head back, breathless and free into the open air. He didn't stop until Sokka dragged him back down and kissed him quiet.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They were a mess. Dirt and sweat, among other things, clung to their skin and clothing as they untangled from each other. Wayward weapons were found and sheathed, and the pair made an unruly attempt at getting back into the palace.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka insisted on escorting him back to his room, citing the need to be 'gentlemanly'. Which was problematic as he couldn't seem to stop himself from pushing Zuko behind pillars and into walls to kiss him senseless every couple of feet.</p><p> </p><p>Not that Zuko was complaining.</p><p> </p><p>When they did finally round the corner to Zuko's wing, Sokka tugged his hand lightly, pulling him to a stop. “Hey.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko knew the words that were going to follow and cut him off with fond exasperation. “Don't say it.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned. “As long as you know I'm thinking it.” He hooked his fingers under Zuko's chin to pull him close enough to press their lips together again, soft and sweet.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko let him for a moment, feeling light as air, before he shoved him lightly, separating them with a laugh. “<em>Fine</em>.” He let go of his hand, instantly feeling the loss like an ache. “Get some sleep Sokka.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gave a mock salute, stepping backwards away from him. “You too. We'll... we'll talk tomorrow?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded. “Okay.” He felt abruptly shy, which was ridiculous considering the rest of what had transpired that night.</p><p> </p><p>He watched Sokka's retreating form until he disappeared into the dark, before entering his own chamber.</p><p> </p><p>Cleaning up was... unpleasant. He debated taking a bath, but his exhaustion was so heavy he thought he might fall asleep and drown if he tried. Instead, he left his clothing in a heap and gave himself a quick wash with his basin water.</p><p> </p><p>He slid into bed, and for the first time he couldn't help but notice the vacancy of the large space.</p><p> </p><p>He wondered. If he had been brave enough to ask.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko stretched out a hand, grabbing one of the pillows from the opposite side of the bed and holding it tightly to his chest.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe...</p><p> </p><p>Maybe.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka closed the door to his wing, leaning his head back against the cool wood. His hands shook slightly and he curled them into fists at his side.</p><p> </p><p>His body was screaming at him, begging, for him to bolt down the hall, straight back to Zuko. Sokka's chest ached with the need to wrap around the prince like a fur stole, and hold him as tightly as his arms would allow.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka closed his eyes and took a few deep, slow breaths.</p><p> </p><p>It was too much.</p><p> </p><p>There was <em>too much</em>.</p><p> </p><p>He snarled through his clenched teeth, slamming his fist into the stone archway beside him and jolting his ragged nerves.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka brought the hand up in front of him. In the firelight he could see the lightly torn skin and redness spread across his knuckles.</p><p> </p><p>Within moments, it faded completely, skin knitting back together, and bruising slipping away into his normal skin tone once more.</p><p> </p><p>He slowly slid down the wall and buried his head in his hands.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*<br/>I hope y'all understand how HARD IT WAS not to name this chapter Of Swordplay and... Other Swordplay, because it is all my mind would let me think about for days.</p><p>Also, feel free to follow me on tumblr, I have the same handle there, just all lowercase. </p><p>&lt;3</p><p>*</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Of Insecurity and Insistence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*straps eyepatch on* </p><p>YAR WE'VE CAUGHT A MIGHTY BEAST TODAY.</p><p>For real though, this chapter refused to be split or cut down in any way, so enjoy this behemoth &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>She was above the water this time.</p><p> </p><p>That was new.</p><p> </p><p>Someone was standing in front of her, bare backed in the moonlight.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi knows who it is. She knows but the edges are blurred and dreamlike and she can't remember.</p><p> </p><p>Black feathers fall through the air, drifting down and hitting the pale skin, melding and sliding beneath it like ink before her eyes.</p><p> </p><p>She has seen them before. She <em>knows</em> she has.</p><p> </p><p>She could look. She could walk around to face them.</p><p> </p><p>Her feet refuse to move.</p><p> </p><p>Her heart refuses to hurt.</p><p> </p><p>Above her, a full bellied moon shines down from a cold dark sky, bouncing off the black water beneath them like a mirror.</p><p> </p><p>Something below her is moving once more, she can see the wake of it in the ocean surface, water pulling downwards above something massive.</p><p> </p><p>Words flood into her consciousness, gentler this time, but allowing no argument.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You are a daughter of dragons. You will be brave.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>She thinks, <em>I don't remember how to be.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko was a coward.</p><p> </p><p>Or at least, he felt like one currently, as it was nearly midday, and he had yet to take a single step away from his chambers.</p><p> </p><p>All of the lust filled bravado he had managed the night before had disappeared entirely in the light of morning. Instead he was filled with an ever mounting anxiety, that had left him unable to leave his bedroom.</p><p> </p><p>Because they said they were going to talk.</p><p> </p><p>And Zuko's traitorous mind refused to envision anything other than the worst possible scenarios.</p><p> </p><p>He knew it was irrational. He <em>knew</em> that.</p><p> </p><p>It didn't stop him from hearing all the ways that Sokka could say he didn't want him, that he regretted what they had done, that he was resigning from his post and <em>leaving</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko blew out a frustrated breath, trying to force the invasive thoughts from his head, and levered himself out of bed.</p><p> </p><p>At the very least he could get dressed.</p><p> </p><p>He managed to throw a robe on, and was just sitting down in his vanity chair when he jolted and nearly fell right out of it as the door to his chambers was suddenly kicked in.</p><p> </p><p>Suki marched into the room, looking like a hurricane. “Why are you hiding.”</p><p> </p><p>He righted himself and stared slack-jawed at her. “Suki, what the f-”</p><p> </p><p>“Nope, no avoiding the question. Why. Are. You. Hiding. I'm going to assume it has something to do with the kicked puppy shaped like Sokka that is moping around downstairs?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes widened as he felt stomach plummet. Oh gods, he hadn't even thought of what it would look like from the other side.</p><p> </p><p>Suki put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot once, agitated. “He seems to think he has done something wrong, or taken advantage of you, or something?! Is that true? Because friend or not, I will absolutely march straight back down there and beat the snot out of him.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko shot up. “No! No, he didn't, I promise. It's not, it's...”</p><p> </p><p>She raised a brow. “It's what? What happened?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed. He could feel his face heat, even just remembering. “We... we sparred. And then we, um, well...”</p><p> </p><p>She rolled her eyes so hard it looked like it hurt. “So you did some sexy sparring, and then some sexy sexing. Then what? Was it bad?”</p><p> </p><p>“No! It was... its- he's amazing.” That didn't come close to describing it, not even a little, but Zuko could barely get a coherent thought out this entire conversation it seemed.</p><p> </p><p>Suki took a deep breath, and sighed, crossing her arms in front of her. “So what is the problem, exactly?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko looked away sharply, his gaze landing on a wall. “I don't... I don't know how to do this, Suki. I've never felt this way with anyone. He is so incredible and Izumi loves him and-” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “-I can't help thinking I'm going to fuck this up somehow. You know how I am.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki poked him, hard. He turned his head slightly to see her frown and point a manicured nail at him. “First of all, Izumi would kick you in the teeth if she thought for one second you were using her as an excuse to turn down the smidgen of happiness that life is apparently offering you. <em>Also</em>, Sokka hoards friends like a barnacle, the only way she could get rid of him now would be to scrape him off and throw him out to sea. That relationship is perfectly safe, no matter what happened between you two.”</p><p> </p><p>Her gaze darkened with a bit of fury. “Zuko. You aren't a fuck-up. You can be stubborn and rude and sometimes <em>painfully</em> awkward, but you <em>aren't</em> a <em>fuck-up</em>. The only person that believed that was your father, and I refuse to have any of his thoughts rattle around in that head of yours.” She took a step forward and grabbed his face with both hands, forcing him to look at her. Her gaze softened, along with her voice. “Don't let him take any more from you than he already has.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko, thrown completely, couldn't do anything but nod at his insistent sentinel.</p><p> </p><p>She smiled, clapped her hands against his face once, and let him go. “Now, Izumi and I are going into town to get fitted for our festival wear. While we are gone, for the <em>love of the spirits</em>, go sort this out.”</p><p> </p><p>She started to walk away, but paused for a moment, hand on her hip. “I won't speak for Sokka, but I will say, from my end, I would trust him with my life a thousand times over. And I would trust him with <em>your</em> life even more than that.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko didn't know what to do with that, but he did feel marginally better. Quietly, he said, “thank you, Suki.”</p><p> </p><p>She gave him a two fingered salute as she marched back out of his open door. “I would wish you good luck, but you're not going to need it.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Finding Sokka turned out to be more time consuming than he had thought.</p><p> </p><p>He wasn't anywhere in the common areas after Zuko had wandered through half the palace, so he resigned himself to making the trek up to Sokka's wing.</p><p> </p><p>He made it up there unimpeded, and he could hear sound coming from the bedroom when he found the door ajar.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was indeed inside, sitting on a bench running a wetstone noisily over his sword. His back was facing the door, and he hadn't noticed Zuko yet, probably not hearing him coming over the sound.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko took a deep breath, steeled himself, and rapped his knuckles on the door frame.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sighed and paused. “Suki if you are just here to yell at me some more, you can save it.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised an eyebrow, and cleared his throat.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's spine stiffened at the sound and he spun in place, sword falling out of his hands as he shot up. “Zuko?” He leapt to his feet but froze in place, seeming not to know what to do with himself</p><p> </p><p>Zuko stepped into the room, closing the door behind him with a quiet click. Sokka eyed him warily, and anxiety sat like a stone in Zuko's stomach at the nervous look in his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Swallowing his pride, he met his gaze. “I'm sorry. It... it wasn't my intention to avoid you, but somehow I did it anyway. I didn't even realize how it might look from this end.” He rubbed a hand down the back of his neck as he felt redness creeping up.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka studied him cautiously, but softened a bit. “Okay? Do you want to tell me what this is all about then? Hard not to feel a bit at fault, considering.”</p><p> </p><p>In hindsight, this was going to sound so stupid. Zuko sighed, resigning himself. “I get... trapped inside my own mind sometimes. I can't seem to stop it, and I spiralled a bit this morning.” He fidgeted with the cloth of his sleeve for a moment. “We said we were going to talk today, and the only thing I could see happening in my own head was you telling me it was just a one time thing, or that you regretted it entirely.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka looked startled, and took a few careful steps towards him. “Regret it? What the- Zuko, I thought you were beautiful from the moment we met.” His brow furrowed. “I just... you said yourself you weren't interested in being pursued by anyone. I never wanted to make you uncomfortable, and I was happy enough just being your friend. I didn't think I was the exception to the rule.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko swallowed hard. “So, you don't...you don't?” He could feel his ears turning red, this whole situation made him want the floor to open up and swallow him whole.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, for the love of the <em>spirits</em>-” Sokka took two quick strides forward, grabbed Zuko's face and hauled him up and forward into a searing kiss. A needy sound escaped him as relief washed out the remaining doubt. He was unceremoniously shoved backwards until his back hit the door with a thud, his body framed entirely by the warrior's. Sokka broke off to stare at him. “No, I don't<em> regret it</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't seem to stop a laugh from working its way out of him, the ridiculousness of the day finally reaching a breaking point. “I'm a bit of a dumb ass sometimes, aren't I.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka rolled his eyes and smiled, nosing him gently. “Yeah, but you're cute, so I forgive you.” His gaze darkened with a bit of something else. “Apparently I have some work to do though, if you believed for even one second that I would be satisfied with a single night.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko didn't even get a chance to respond because hot lips found his again, and he could do nothing except tilt his head into it as Sokka pressed into him, pinning him to the wall. He was kissed beyond all sense, until he was desperate for air, lips spit-slick. He ground his hips up into Sokka's and was rewarded with shaky moan rumbled against his jaw.</p><p> </p><p>Feeling brave, he slid his hand up to undo the tie of Sokka's robe, satisfied when it loosened and slid off his shoulders. With skin bared, his hands roamed freely, one following the notches of his spine and coming to rest just above Sokka's waist, hooked into the fabric of his waistband. The other slid down his front, trying to get enough space to get to the laces of his pants.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka pulled back with a groan as Zuko's knuckles brushed against him. “No. Nope. We are making it to a bed this time if it kills me.”</p><p> </p><p>And Zuko wanted to argue, because he was perfectly happy where they were, but strong hands wrapped around his thighs and hoisted him up off his feet, giving him no choice but to wrap his legs around Sokka's waist.</p><p> </p><p>He barely registered them moving, head thrown back in a moan as Sokka licked a hot line up his throat, before he was falling backwards to sprawl on Sokka's bed as the warrior's weight settled heavy between his legs.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka wasted no time, slipping Zuko's shirt free as well and running a broad hand down the pale skin of his chest, following the rosy flush. His eyes met Zuko's, black almost eclipsing the blue-grey. “You're so fucking beautiful. You don't want to know how many times I have had this exact fantasy.”</p><p> </p><p>And Zuko didn't even have time to be embarrassed because his pants were being shoved down and off and a mouth trailed fire down his chest and navel. His hand found purchase in Sokka's hair, loose around his shoulders, as Sokka dipped lower, pressing a kiss to Zuko's hipbone before turning to lick a broad stripe up his hardened length.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's hips jolted as he was sucked into a ridiculously hot mouth, and Sokka shoved an arm across his stomach to pin him to the bed. Zuko's hand gripped tighter than he meant to in Sokka's hair, but the warrior didn't seem to mind, looking up at him with an expression nothing short of predatory.</p><p> </p><p>A high and needy whine escaped him when Sokka pulled off for a moment, bringing his free hand up to stroke him a couple of times, before delving lower, fingers just barely touching the edge of his rim. “Have you done this before?”</p><p> </p><p>Breathing hard, Zuko has to swallow twice before attempting to speak, but even then it feels like gravel when words finally come. “Yes, I have. Been a long time though.” It had been <em>years</em>, and the last experience hadn't been anything to write home about, but Zuko didn't think that would be the case today.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled, dropping a kiss to Zuko's inner thigh, before pushing himself up to snag a vial of something off his bedside table. “Well, I'm not in any rush, so tell me if you are uncomfortable, okay?” He waited until he got a nod from Zuko, before returning to the task at hand. He slid lower, sucking at Zuko's balls this time and shoving one his thighs over his shoulder for better access.</p><p> </p><p>Even knowing it was coming, Zuko couldn't stop himself from tensing when slick fingers found his entrance, but Sokka waited, rubbing gently until he relaxed enough to slip one oiled finger inside.</p><p> </p><p>His back arched as Sokka took him in his mouth once more, sucking at just the tip as Zuko writhed beneath him. The change in angle meant Sokka's finger slid deeper, gliding over a spot that lit Zuko up like lightning. His thigh clamped hard where it rested on Sokka's shoulder, hands clutching into brown hair desperately. Words tore out of his throat like sandpaper. “Fuck, <em>Sokka</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes softened in amusement as he pulled back for a moment, slipping a second finger in along the first.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was trembling, breathless and sweat slick and by all accounts an absolute mess, but Sokka kept looking at him as if he was the most gorgeous thing he had ever seen. It made his heart ache with longing, desperate for him even as he actively had him.</p><p> </p><p>He could feel himself getting close, heat settling low and tightening in his belly. He tightened his grip in Sokka's hair and forcibly pulled him back, even as the muscles in his arms shook with restraint. “Sweet fucking <em>Agni</em>, Sokka. You've got to stop for a minute or I'm never going to last.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka quirked an eyebrow at him, unimpressed. “I told you, I'm not in a rush, you think I'm going to let you get away with just once?” He smirked, a devilish grin as the only warning before he sunk down again, taking Zuko straight down his throat. Zuko didn't even know what sound he made as he threw his head back against the mattress, and just gave in.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka removed his fingers for a moment, and Zuko heard the clink of the vial again, before he was breached with three fingers, long and perfect, and crooking deliciously against him in all the right ways, and Zuko was <em>gone</em>.</p><p> </p><p>When he came back to himself, Sokka was smiling against his thigh, free hand rubbing circles into Zuko's stomach as he shuddered beneath him. His mouth was an obscene mess when he spoke. “Okay to keep going?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was going to die.</p><p> </p><p>What a way to go, though.</p><p> </p><p>He reached down to get a better grip on Sokka's face and hauled him up to kiss him properly. The bitter taste that remained was unpleasant, but Zuko was more than happy to burn it away. He slid a hand downwards and undid Sokka's pants, shoving them down and off with his own legs, as Sokka laughed into his mouth. “I will take that as a yes.”</p><p> </p><p>He snagged a pillow from behind Zuko's head, wrapping Zuko's legs around his waist to place it beneath his hips.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka lined himself up, but didn't move for a moment, instead using one hand to hook Zuko's chin and pull him up to kiss him. Zuko didn't have a coherent thought left in his head to do anything but relax into him, moaning against his lips as Sokka pushed forward, just enough to sink a few inches into him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko broke from the kiss and panted, arms sliding up Sokka's sides to wrap around his back, hands digging into broad shoulders. It didn't hurt, but the burning stretch of it was all consuming, as well as the knowledge that this was <em>Sokka</em>, and he wanted him so badly his skin ached with it.</p><p> </p><p>It both was, and wasn't, surprising that Zuko was already nearly fully hard again, helped as Sokka fully hilted himself, and his stomach rubbed against him. He couldn't seem to stop himself from tightening his thighs around Sokka's waist, pulling him in just that much tighter. He was pleased to see Sokka looked just as wrecked as him, muscles in his arms straining where they were braced beside Zuko's head. “<em>Tui</em> and fucking <em>La</em>, Zuko, I am trying not to hurt you.” Sweat beaded on his neck, running a line down his chest.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smirked, “You won't. I told you before, I trust you.” He leaned up just high enough to drag his teeth under Sokka's jaw, arching his back just a bit. “Come on Sokka, <em>please</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's pupils blew out as his restraint crumbled and he snapped his hips forward and back, the thick drag of him making Zuko's toes curl where his legs remained wrapped around him.</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't fast and frantic, but every thrust was hard and deep and Zuko was driven to near madness with the feel of it. Sokka dropped down to his elbows so he could kiss him again, but they spent more time just sliding their lips in a mess together since both of them were out of breath.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka slid a hand down his flank, wrapping around his back a bit to pull his hips upwards slightly and the angle changed just enough that every thrust was sliding perfectly against where he wanted it most. Zuko's hands clawed in where they gripped Sokka's shoulders as he gasped and whined against his mouth.</p><p> </p><p>He felt Sokka's teeth sink into his neck, just hard enough to feel the sharp bite of it, and Zuko was gone once more, coming untouched between their stomachs.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka lasted a half dozen more thrusts before he stilled, groaning loud against Zuko's throat.</p><p> </p><p>All of Zuko's muscles seemed to give out at once, legs and arms slipping from around Sokka, landing boneless beside him. He was sure Sokka was saying something to him, but his brain couldn't comprehend a single thing over the roaring of blood in his ears. He mumbled something in agreement anyway, and felt the huff of a laugh against his cheek.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka pulled back from him, and Zuko grunted in displeasure at the feeling of emptiness that followed, as well as the loss of his warmth, but he couldn't do anything but lay there with his eyes closed, hoping the room would stop spinning.</p><p> </p><p>A damp cloth ran over his stomach, making his skin jump at the cool feeling as Sokka gently cleaned him up before laying back down between his spread thighs.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had half a thought that there were far more convenient positions to sleep, but he was slipping into unconsciousness before he could even think about speaking.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He didn't know how long he slept for, but daylight was still slipping through the open balcony when he finally came to.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was still sprawled between his legs, resting on his stomach with his face pillowed in the crook of his elbow on Zuko's belly. It didn't look like a terribly comfortable resting place, but Sokka didn't seem keen on moving any time soon.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko let his hand drift down, running lightly his fingers across Sokka's brow and down his face, settling on his shoulder and letting his thumb rub nonsense circles into the muscle.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka hummed in approval but didn't open his eyes, electing to half doze for a bit longer instead.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't help but appreciate the closeness of this. Because <em>this</em> was something he had never done. Or more, something he had never allowed himself to do.</p><p> </p><p>Any of his youthful hookups had been just that, and Zuko had never trusted anyone to stay afterwards, so this was all new territory for him.</p><p> </p><p>He continued to play over the ends of the tattoos that stretched to the top of Sokka's shoulder, when his brows knit together as his fingers felt something odd.</p><p> </p><p>It was strange because his hands had just been there.</p><p> </p><p>It was strange because he knew he had dug his fingers in and scratched him.</p><p> </p><p>It was strange because the skin beneath his hand was smooth and unmarked, not even red.</p><p> </p><p>It was strange because having Sokka's whole body pressed against him meant that he could feel his heartbeat without even trying, but it wasn't the same as before. The resonance and all consuming thrum that he had felt, was just a simple dull thump where Sokka's chest rested against his hip.</p><p> </p><p>Now that he knew the difference, it was night and day between the two.</p><p> </p><p>He knew there was a connection somewhere, a reason for all of it. His mind swirled with all kinds of possibilities, but he snapped himself away from them, learning his lesson from earlier that morning.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko said nothing for a minute, unwilling to break the quiet and lose the moment. Slowly, he drew his hand back up Sokka's arm, following the black line work that wove around the muscles in intricate patterns, coming to rest at the juncture of his neck and shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>“I'm not imagining it, am I?” He kept his voice low, letting his thumb run lightly over the skin above Sokka's pulse point. “This. It means something.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes opened, but didn't meet his. He shifted to pull back from him, but Zuko slid his hand higher to his cheek to hold him. “This isn't an interrogation Sokka, I just...” He trailed off, not even really knowing what he wanted out of this conversation.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka took a deep breath and exhaled slowly through his nose. “Yes. It does mean something.” He flicked his gaze to Zuko, and he was pained to see nervousness in the warrior's eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko reached with his free hand down to rest in Sokka's, palm to palm but inverse. “Okay.” When Sokka shifted, turning his head to look square at him, brow furrowed, he continued. “You will tell me? Eventually, I mean.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka muscles relaxed from where he had tensed, melting back into Zuko as relief seemed to wash over him. “Yes. Yes I promise. It's just... it's a lot. I need a bit of time.” He tilted his head to press a kiss to Zuko's palm, and Zuko sighed as he felt warmth spread and tingle at the touch.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gave him a little half smile. “I just, I know you do something, you block it somehow so I can't feel it.” Zuko looked down at where their hands were entwined. “It feels good when you let me, that's all.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka studied him, seeming to war with himself for a minute before his expression softened. “Okay.”</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't like before, not the frenzied rush like lightning shooting through him, but Zuko could feel it, like a door being opened, just a crack, just enough, as warmth flooded him head to toe, leaving sparks in it's wake. The thrum of Sokka's heart beating with his was enough leave him breathless, as he felt it shift back and forth between the two of them.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka dragged his lips over the wrist that held him, working his way upwards until he changed direction and licked a broad stripe over Zuko's hip.</p><p> </p><p>He had thought that their previous activities had worn him out entirely, but his breathing started to come faster as arousal settled heavy in his gut once more.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes were bright and amused as they watched him. “Too much?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't seem to stop his body from shifting restlessly from where he was half pinned beneath Sokka. “I can't tell if you are trying to distract me, or <em>kill</em> me, but fuck I don't know if I will survive another round.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed, “Is that a no?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko looked down at him in disbelief, even as his own desire grew by the second. “If you think you can manage it without accidentally committing <em>regicide</em>, then by all means.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned at him, all teeth, and really, Zuko should know better than to pose him with a challenge.</p><p> </p><p>It was an embarrassingly short time before Sokka had him red flushed and squirming, clawing into the sheets like a wild thing.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko was starving.</p><p> </p><p>They had rested again afterwards, regaining some composure, and his stomach had chosen to loudly announced itself. Which wasn't a surprise, since he hadn't really eaten today, and thanks to their frenzied romp, it was late afternoon.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had just laughed and sat up, pulling Zuko to stand with him on legs that felt like noodles. “Come on. Lets get cleaned up and go liberate some food from the kitchens, hmm?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko steadied himself, ignoring the ache in his muscles, and walked over to the wash basin to wipe himself down. He caught a glance at himself in the mirror, and froze, suddenly grateful that all of his formal wear was high-collared.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Agni</em>, Sokka, I look like I've been <em>mauled</em>.” He brought his hand up to poke at his neck, where redness and love bites and sucked bruises littered his throat, carving a path down to his navel.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's face appeared in the reflection over his shoulder, as arms circled his waist. Smugness radiated off of his half grin as he planted a quick kiss on Zuko's cheek. “Sorry.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko swatted at him halfheartedly. “You are not.” He couldn't help but lean back into him though as Sokka smiled, trailing his mouth down the marks before veering off and pressing a lingering kiss to Zuko's bare shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>Gods, at this rate they were never going to leave this room.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko allowed it to continue for another moment, but Sokka's hands started to drift downwards and he groaned and grabbed them before they could make it past his hips. “Nope. No. Not again. I will literally die Sokka.” The arms around him loosened as he was released, and he turned to face him. “I at least need a meal before we do anything else.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was still smirking at him so he poked him in the cheek. It was apparently risky business because his finger was instantly caught lightly between sharp teeth. Zuko sighed in exasperation. “You're a menace.” His words lacked heat though, because even he couldn't deny the gentle warmth settling through him at the touch.</p><p> </p><p>The warrior released his prize and laughed. “So I've been told.” He shot him a wink before untangling from him entirely, making his way to the wardrobe to change.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko followed suit, throwing the clothes on that he had originally come in here with, which turned into a bit of a task since they were scattered all over the room. He tried to make any sort of sense to the tangle his mane of hair had become, but ultimately gave up and just piled it high, tying it off in a messy bun.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka waited for him at the door, throwing an arm around his shoulders as soon as he was in reach and guiding him out into the hallway.</p><p> </p><p>With his earlier anxiety thoroughly burned away, Zuko allowed himself to indulge a bit more, slipping his hand around Sokka's waist to settle warmly on his hip.</p><p> </p><p>The frustrated whine that came from Sokka was just as satisfying. “Let's get some food while I still have the willpower. Otherwise I might drag you back into my bed and never let you leave.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko thought that didn't sound so bad, but he laughed, and allowed himself to be all but towed down the hallway towards the kitchens.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It hadn't really occurred to Zuko, the other repercussions of this, until they walked into the dining hall and were instantly spotted by Suki and Izumi.</p><p> </p><p>He froze in place, face instantly flushing as two sets of eyes assessed them both.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka followed suit beside him. “Um...”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi looked between them for a moment, her gaze shifting from surprise to understanding before a wicked grin stretched across her face. Her eyes landed more firmly on Sokka, and she lifted her hands to sign.<em> “So, should I start calling you 'Uncle' Sokka now?” </em></p><p> </p><p>The warrior flushed red, sputtering beside him, and Zuko couldn't help but burst out laughing.</p><p> </p><p>Suki joined him, pointing a finger at Sokka and snickering delightedly. “His face!” She clapped her other hand on Izumi's shoulder. “Princess, promise me you'll never change.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko hauled the blushing warrior to the table, hunger overriding any of his own embarrassment, though he would be lying if he said he wasn't somewhat pleased that he wasn't the only one capable of getting so flustered.</p><p> </p><p>They weren't pressed for any further information as they ate, instead talking mostly about the upcoming festival and the outfits they were having tailored.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was surprised Izumi wanted to come at all, crowds in general were not her thing, but when he asked, it was Sokka who answered.</p><p> </p><p>“I talked her into it.” He gave her a wink, smiling.</p><p> </p><p>She rolled her eyes at him. <em>“I'm not going to stay for the whole thing, but I promised to join in for one dance.” </em>She shrugged.<em> “Should be terrible.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned. “Don't worry, my sister used to say I have all the rhythm of a one legged ostrich-horse, which is to say, none at all. Next to me you will look nothing short of amazing.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki smirked and chimed in. “I can attest to that. I saw him dance in the Northern Water Tribe once, how Yue endured it for so long I will never know.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka raised a brow at her and gave her a considering look. “I think she was hoping someone else would cut in and save her from me. No such luck though.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki's face hardened into something less kind, and she seemed about to respond but closed her mouth instead and looked down at her plate.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko frowned, looking between them as the energy at the table turned tense. When no further comments came from either one, he decided to steer the conversation away.</p><p> </p><p>“I feel like I need to follow suit one of these days and go get some decent clothes for this. Everything in my wardrobe is all standard fire nation colours.” He knocked his knee into Sokka's under the table.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka took the bait, propping his head in his hand and gazing sideways at him. “I will once again say that blue clothing is not mandatory.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed. “Oh, we are well past that. At this rate I would be the only one <em>not</em> wearing blue.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sighed, but relaxed and gave him a softer smile. “I think it'll suit you.”</p><p> </p><p>Across from them, Izumi mimed barfing, Suki laughed once more, and the tension eased.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Both of them had packed away a rather impressive amount of food before they finally dispersed from the dining hall.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't resist letting their fingers tangle once more as they made their way through the palace. He didn't remember ever being as happy as he felt right at this second. He felt like a starving man presented with a feast he would never tire of.</p><p> </p><p>“So.” Sokka began as they rounded the corner towards Zuko's wing. He gestured with his head to Zuko's door. “Do I have an invite?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko shot him an incredulous look.“I am not having another morning like today if I can help it, so yes, consider this an open invitation.” Zuko furrowed his brow. “I told you before I'm not very good at this. You have to tell me if you want something, because I will never assume anything.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka resisted the urge to roll his eyes and tugged him in, close enough to tuck his face close to Zuko's temple. “You are much better than you think. And that was in no way a demand, I just didn't want to take anything for granted.” He turned his head to kiss Zuko on the nose, and smiled when he scrunched up his face in annoyance.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko batted him away, but grabbed his hand and pulled him into his chambers.</p><p> </p><p>Entering Zuko's room was a new experience. Last time he was here, he had purposefully not looked at anything, trying to be as respectful as possible to a space that wasn't his. Now that he was here with permission, he couldn't help but look around at the large space devoted to the ruler of the nation.</p><p> </p><p>It was not overly ostentatious. Not like it could be, or probably <em>was</em> at some point. There was some artwork on the walls, mostly of nature scenes or animals in general, as well as some decorative weapons, but the most obvious collection in the space was <em>books</em>. They were everywhere, filling every available shelf to the point of overflowing, strewn over tables, and stacked in piles beside his bed.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't help but think of when he had found him down in the old library, comfortably tucked into a couch with a different selection beside him. He warmed at the memory, Zuko calm and quiet, lost beyond time to the world inside his own mind. He wondered how often that happened in here as well.</p><p> </p><p>He was interrupted from his thoughts when Zuko's voice filtered in from a room to his left.</p><p> </p><p>“I, um. I was going to run a bath. If. If you want? To join me, I mean.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled to himself, unbearably fond of Zuko's ever present shyness. “Of course I do.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>To call it a bath seemed like an understatement. It was huge, large enough to fit four people comfortably with room to spare. It had marble seats along the sides, while the centre dipped down low enough to stand and still be half covered.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka felt fairly decadent and groaned happily as the pair of them slipped into the steaming water, his muscles loosening in relief at the heat.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko went to move away from him as they settled, and Sokka made a displeased sound and caught his hip with his hand to stop him. Zuko huffed a laugh. “I'm not going anywhere, I just need some space to tackle this mess.” He gestured at his hair, as he slid forward again, pulling the tie from where it held it. The black strands fell in waves down his back, the ends just barely reaching into the water at his waist.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't help but reach a hand out and run his fingers through some of it, snagging a tangle and gently freeing it. “Want some help?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko half turned towards him, eyeing him curiously. “Sure? You don't have to.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled. “Well I can't help but feel a bit responsible.” He leaned to the side to grab a small comb that he could see sitting in a basket. “Besides which, I actually like doing things like this. I used to do my sister's all the time.” He eyed the multiple bottles beside them. “Which one of these would work as a detangler?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko wordlessly reached over and handed a clear bottle filled with an amber coloured liquid to Sokka. He poured a small amount into his palm and picked up a section of hair to slowly work it into, combing gently as he went.</p><p> </p><p>It took a decent amount of time to get through, but Sokka was pleased to find out that he had an indefinite source of heated water thanks to Zuko, so they were in no rush.</p><p> </p><p>When he finally finished, he gently began to weave it into a loose braid to keep it neat. It left Zuko's back on display, and Sokka couldn't help but notice the small bruises spaced sporadically on the pale skin. Likely left over from their tussle the night previous, and it wasn't as if he didn't get hit as well but...</p><p> </p><p>Slowly, he let his hand run lightly over the marks, pulling a bit of the hurt into himself. Not enough to notice, hopefully, but he couldn't help but feel a small amount of satisfaction as the darker bruises lightened and some of the redness disappeared entirely. His hand ached for a moment as it took the brunt of it, but his body quickly dispersed it away, leaving only a bit of pins and needles behind.</p><p> </p><p>He plucked the strap of leather back out of Zuko's hand to tie the braid off, but as he thought back to the night before, he couldn't help but remember something. “What did you decide on, yesterday?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko turned his head slightly in confusion. “Decide?”</p><p> </p><p>“As your prize. If memory serves, you beat me fair and square.” And he had, which thrilled Sokka to no end. It was very seldom someone was able to best him as well as that.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes widened in realization. “Oh! Well...” He looked down at the water, letting his hand play on the surface for a moment. “It seems a bit mundane now, but I was going to ask you to tell me more stories.”</p><p> </p><p>Whatever answers Sokka had considered, that had certainly not been one of them.</p><p> </p><p>He furrowed his brow slightly. “You can ask for something else if you like, it seems a bit of a waste to ask for something I would give freely.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko shrugged. “It's what I want.” He seemed a bit embarrassed, and Sokka was having none of that, so he reached forward to tug him backwards to sit between his legs.</p><p> </p><p>“Fair enough, any requests?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko thought for a moment, resisting the pull slightly before giving up and settling his full weight against him. “Not really? I wouldn't mind learning a bit more about you though.” He ducked his head down a bit and mumbled. “Mostly, I just like the sound of your voice.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled, he didn't think his voice was anything particularly special, but it wasn't his opinion that mattered, currently. “As you wish.”</p><p> </p><p>He thought for a bit, scrolling mentally through some past events of note for something worth telling. “You know that my sister and I travelled with Aang while he was training, did you ever hear about his earthbending master?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko shook his head lightly. “No, I don't think so.”</p><p> </p><p>“Her name is Toph. One of the most powerful earthbenders to date, I would imagine.” Sokka smirked. “Also quite a hard ass when it came to training Aang, but I would be lying if I said it wasn't a little bit enjoyable to watch him fail at something for once.”</p><p> </p><p>With that, he launched into the story of meeting her in the Earth Kingdom, and watching her wreck the tournament at Earth Rumble Six.</p><p> </p><p>He continued on through Aang's training, but only made it half way into telling him about his own misfortune with a baby sabertooth-moose-lion before Zuko was a pink and laughing mess, near tears in his arms.</p><p> </p><p>As he spoke he couldn't help but hold him closer, and think <em>please, please let me keep this. I will do anything.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>~~</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Later, when they had dried off and settled into bed, and Zuko was pliant and sleep warm where he was sprawled across his chest, Sokka tucked his nose into the loose hair by his temple and remembered a different part of the story. A piece he hadn't said.</p><p> </p><p>That one night when he had taken up watch while Aang and Katara slept, Toph had come to sit beside him by the fire.</p><p> </p><p>She hadn't said anything initially, letting her eyes gaze towards the heat, even if she couldn't see the flames. And then, very quietly, she had said, “You are something else, aren't you.”</p><p> </p><p>And Sokka had felt so stupid. Because of course, she would know. The differences were small, near imperceptible, but to someone who recognized people by the sound of their footfalls, by the <em>beat</em> of their <em>hearts</em>, it would be obvious.</p><p> </p><p>He had waited, dread like a stone in his gut, for her to call him out, to demand the truth, but she hadn't.</p><p> </p><p>Instead she just nodded to herself. And carried on as if nothing had happened.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka wondered what she was doing now, he hadn't spoken to her in what felt like ages.</p><p> </p><p>He knew if she was here, she wouldn't hesitate to box his ears and call him a coward.</p><p> </p><p>And she would be right.</p><p> </p><p>But he was working on it. He had some idea of how, but it would take a bit of quiet planning, and Sokka was too exhausted to do much more of anything tonight.</p><p> </p><p>It could wait until tomorrow.</p><p> </p><p>He tucked Zuko more firmly against him, unbearably grateful for his patience.</p><p> </p><p>It <em>would</em> wait, until he was ready.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Is this chapter like 4% plot and 96% porn? Yes.</p><p>Do I care? No. </p><p>As always, thank you to my lovely commenters and kudosers, you guys mean the world to me &lt;3&lt;3&lt;3</p><p>Follow me on tumblr for erratic posts about anything and everything. @syciaralynx</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Of Pasts and Plans</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*<br/>Is editing the worst? </p><p>Yes. Yes it is.</p><p>This was going to be the intro to chapter 12, and then it got out of control. So now here we are, since I had to split it into three, and rearrange all kinds of stuff to make it work or else have a chapter that was like 20,000 words, which... no. </p><p>Anyways I'm pretty happy with the end result for this chunk, so enjoy &lt;3</p><p>*</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>When Sokka was a child, his grandmother had walked him out into the tundra, and sat him down to gaze with her into the night sky.</p><p> </p><p>“It is about <em>balance</em>, Sokka.” It had been freezing, but Kanna was unbothered and pleasant from where she sat across from him in the snow. “We hold a piece of her inside us, and it constantly seeks to return. So she ensures that we have an anchor, someone to complete us, in much the same way she does. La tethers her to the world, in the eternal push and pull, but that is not all they are to each other. For those of us who can see it, it is hard to miss how much they love one another as well.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka, much younger, barely passed seven at the time, had frowned and played with his hands in the snow. “But... how will I know? If it could be anyone, how will I be able to find them?”</p><p> </p><p>Kanna had chuckled, eyes crinkling at the corners. “Oh, you will know. When you are close, it is a pull like no other. You will be drawn to them like a moth to a flame.” She grinned, wide and sharp. “It is no coincidence that I fled the Northern Tribe, and came to the opposite end of the world before I found your Grandfather.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had huffed, and worried his lip nervously. “What if I never get close enough?” He brushed the snow off his hands and hugged his knees to his chest.</p><p> </p><p>She hadn't answered right away, but leaned forward to touch one mitted hand to his chest. “I will never forget the day you came into this world, kicking and screaming to announce yourself. The second I heard your little heart, I knew you were another like me.” Her smile gentled with amusement. “I had only ever met one other, and I was so excited I could barely stop myself from shifting then and there.” She chuckled to herself, and leaned forward to rest both hands on his small shoulders. “Many things in this life are left up to chance, Sokka, but this is not one of them.”</p><p> </p><p>She had tugged him forward, leaning their foreheads together lightly.</p><p> </p><p>“We <em>always</em> find them, she demands it of us.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The barest hints of light were just starting brighten the horizon visible outside the window when Sokka woke. The cool morning air was brisk, but Zuko was a furnace where he was tucked against him, breathing evenly against his shoulder. <em>Firebenders</em>.</p><p> </p><p>It was early, much too early to be awake, but he wasn't surprised that he was, considering his two impromptu naps the previous day.</p><p> </p><p>They hadn't moved much in the night, only closer. Sokka must have turned slightly more towards him, and Zuko had apparently trapped one of his legs between his own. They were a mess and tangle of limbs, and Sokka wanted to burrow in and never leave.</p><p> </p><p>The slowly brightening sky started to illuminate the room, and Sokka couldn't help but notice the stark contrast of their skin everywhere they were tangled. Pale on dark.</p><p> </p><p><em>Balance</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka blew out a slow, measured breath, shifting carefully to bring one hand upwards. He let his fingers drift up to Zuko's face, just barely tracing the border of the scar below his cheek.</p><p> </p><p>The last time he had returned to the South Pole, he had been much older. Battle worn and weary despite his youth, arriving to the place of his birth, that was starting to feel less and less like home.</p><p> </p><p>It is where the heart is, as they say, and his... well.</p><p> </p><p>He had held composure, pasted on a smile as he greeted people in the village, all eager to see his return for the coming festival. Despite himself, Sokka's careful mask had crumbled into dust as soon as he entered Kanna's home.</p><p> </p><p>She had taken one look at him, and crossed the igloo to haul him into her arms, age not matching the strength of her hold.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had been much taller than her then, but somehow the embrace felt just the same as it had when he was small. His voice had felt like glass, hoarse and raw from where his face was pressed into her coat. “How do you bear it? Without him. How have you gone on this long, I-” He abruptly cut off, voice cracking as his pain was laid out before them both.</p><p> </p><p>At the same time, it was such a release, to say it to someone who would know, who would understand <em>exactly</em> what he meant. How it felt.</p><p> </p><p>She pulled back, cupping his face in her hands and resting his forehead against her own. “Oh, Sokka. We are built to withstand so much, but it can be such a lonely thing, to love as hard as we do.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had closed his eyes, tightly as he could, as hot tears escaped from them.</p><p> </p><p>She ran her thumbs under his eyes, wiping the dampness away from his cheeks. “I do not bear it, I simply endure, and I have faith. One day I will see my Kalik again, but in the meantime I love the gifts he gave me instead. Like my son, and my grandchildren. Do not give up hope, there is a reason for who she chooses. Have faith, just like I do.”</p><p> </p><p>He hadn't been able to reply, but his grandmother demanded nothing else from him, simply holding him where he was, waiting patiently for him to regain his composure.</p><p> </p><p>He did, after a time, swallowing hard and retreating slightly from her, able to feel the puffiness in his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Kanna had cupped his cheek and smiled gently at him. “Try and let go of your morose thoughts for one night at least. We have a hunt to go on after all.”</p><p> </p><p>“You are coming with me?” His brows had raised slightly in surprise.</p><p> </p><p>She nodded. “These old bones can handle the change for one night, and more easily with you here.” She grinned then, amused. “And if I want to have an actual feast, then I have no choice! You have always been a gentle one, in spite of it all, and I am well aware that you love the chase more than the kill, unless you have turned a new leaf?”</p><p> </p><p>He shook his head. “Not yet, I haven't.”</p><p> </p><p>“Good.” Kanna had assessed him for a moment, seeming to choose her words carefully. “Maybe, after this, you should take a trip to the North. Visit her in person. She may not offer you any answers, but it may bring you some peace. It can be restful for us, simply to be near her spirit.”</p><p> </p><p>Later, Sokka had gazed up at the night sky, standing strong and wild against the howling wind of the tundra.</p><p> </p><p>Looking at the full moon, he couldn't help but think,<em> “You are the cause of my fury, and my pain, if I come to you, will you tell me why?”</em></p><p> </p><p>She hadn't replied, and he hadn't been surprised.</p><p> </p><p>Days later, he had taken his grandmother's advice, and had set sail with his team to the frozen North.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's chest hurt at the memory, suddenly missing Kanna terribly. He hadn't seen his grandmother since then, and while he routinely sent letters to her as often as he could, it didn't compare to an actual conversation with her patient counsel.</p><p> </p><p>He took a shuddering breath, trying to shake the old feeling of despair that used to cling to him like tar.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was still dead to the world in his arms, unaware of Sokka's internal turmoil. He concentrated on the slow even breathing coming from his lover, and forcibly slowed his own until they matched, letting his muscles relax.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka so badly wanted to keep the peace, to keep everything like it was, right now. Where they could just enjoy each other, even if this was as far as it ever got, but he knew it wasn't fair to do such a thing.</p><p> </p><p>He had to tell him.</p><p> </p><p>Because Sokka could not do things by half-measures. Which meant that all of this, even the ugly parts of it, had to be brought out into the light of day.</p><p> </p><p>And he was terrified of what would happen, <em>after</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sighed heavily, knowing he wouldn't be able to fall back to sleep anymore. He extricated himself from Zuko as carefully as he could, swinging his legs off the side of the bed.</p><p> </p><p>The sleeping firelord roused to half-wakefulness as he was jostled, and made a questioning noise as he blinked unfocused up at him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't help the way his mouth quirked into a smile as an arm fumbled out towards him and wrapped around his waist. He twisted around and down, leaning on his hand to press a light kiss to Zuko's forehead. “Go back to sleep. I'm going to get a snack and maybe work out a bit, it's early.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes were closed once more, but his brow furrowed as his voice came out sleep slurred and rough. “How in the world do you have the energy to work out after everything we did yesterday?” He yawned and stretched, wincing slightly. “I feel like I've been trampled by a horse.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed softly. “A handsome horse?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sat up slightly to look at him, he rolled his eyes but his expression was fond. He reached a hand up to pull Sokka down just close enough to catch his lips in a chaste kiss before he released him and laughed. “Absolutely, the most handsome horse. Now go do your early morning nonsense. I am going to sleep for another hour with the rest of the sane people.” He turned over, facing away from Sokka and the light of the window, relaxing back into the pillows.</p><p> </p><p>The sheet had slipped down to his hips, and Sokka's brain shut off for a moment as miles of pale skin were left on display.</p><p> </p><p>He shook his head, not giving in to the impulse to slide back into bed and shove his face to rest between Zuko's shoulder blades.</p><p> </p><p>Though it was ridiculously tempting.</p><p> </p><p>Levering himself off the bed, he set about finding his wayward clothing, just getting dressed enough to make it to his own wing and change properly.</p><p> </p><p>As he walked through the quiet halls of Zuko's wing, he couldn't help but notice that Izumi's door was open, her room left cold and dark.</p><p> </p><p>Frowning, he quickened his steps.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>She could see the shape of it now, almost. Like a blurred image slowly coming into focus, all the moving parts were slotting into place around her, and she could not stop it.</p><p> </p><p>Her dreams had left behind the abject horror, and now just clawed into her with a slowly creeping dread that followed her into wakefulness.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi had woken that morning to a quiet dawn, and ignored her aching heart to slip out of her room and make some tea in the kitchens.</p><p> </p><p>Longjing had been her father's favourite, and though she wasn't overly fond of the sweeter taste, the smell of it brought her some much needed comfort. She didn't drink much of it, but held the cup to her lips so the steam could rise to her nose, and savoured the warmth in her hands.</p><p> </p><p>A quiet knock came from the doorway behind her, and she glanced up from her cup to see Sokka taking a tentative step towards her.</p><p> </p><p>She couldn't hide her ragged state, and there was no point in trying since he would already know, so she just met his gaze evenly.</p><p> </p><p>He said nothing, not breaking the silence quite yet, but came around the table to sit beside her. He poured himself a cup from the teapot and took a testing sip.</p><p> </p><p>She looked back down at her cup, letting her fingertips follow the raised lines of artwork on the pottery.</p><p> </p><p>This set featured a blue scaled dragon, wrapped all the way around until it touched it's own tail, above a deep blue ocean.</p><p> </p><p>She had asked, in her sleep last night, the sound of her voice shocking even her in the dream space.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>How do I stop it? Please, there must be a way.” </em></p><p> </p><p>And a guttural response had instantly flooded her mind.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>That is the right question. And one I have already answered. Courage. Even when it seems like there is none to be had.” </em></p><p> </p><p>Which was an answer, but not a helpful one.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi was knocked out of her thoughts when Sokka nudged her elbow with his. “Hey.”</p><p> </p><p>She looked up at him, and he raised an eyebrow in question as he lifted his arm in offering.</p><p> </p><p>She blew out a shaky breath and slid under it gratefully, slotting into his side. The pressure of his hold around her shoulders was grounding, as was the warmth seeping into her side from his body.</p><p> </p><p>She waited for a question, or a condolence, but none came this time.</p><p> </p><p>He had his own secrets as well, his own hurt. She knew this, so maybe he understood her need for silence on the subject today.</p><p> </p><p>Minutes passed by, and the pair sat together in companionable quiet for some time before Sokka finally spoke.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you feel up for some practice today?”</p><p> </p><p>She hesitated for a moment, but nodded, shrugging.</p><p> </p><p>A distraction would be nice, if nothing else.</p><p> </p><p>It couldn't hurt.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It definitely <em>could</em> hurt.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi was cursing herself in hindsight as her muscles ached more and more, lungs burning with exertion.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka, seemingly pleased with her progress after they had warmed up, had introduced her to a new move set today. Which consisted of a complicated acrobatic array that used muscles she hadn't even known to <em>exist in her body</em> until right now.</p><p> </p><p>But at the same time, it felt good to work on something with an obvious goal, not to mention the endorphin kick of the exercise.</p><p> </p><p>She had succeeded a couple of times, but more often than not she would trip or stumble part way through and have to start from the beginning again.</p><p> </p><p>The morning had brightened around them as they continued, and it wasn't long before Zuko joined them, taking a seat on the edge of the yard with his breakfast in hand. He hadn't interrupted, just watched them with interest after waving a quick hello.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's patience was seemingly endless, as he followed her through the set each time, returning to starting position each time she did. It helped, knowing he was simply willing to teach her, and not be frustrated each time she failed.</p><p> </p><p>Her legs were quickly losing stability with exhaustion, but she was determined to get one last good set before they quit.</p><p> </p><p>When she finally did, she broke into a grin at the feeling of accomplishment. She dropped her staff to the sand and panted hard, hands resting on her knees.</p><p> </p><p>Her uncle gave a one man round of applause from the bench.</p><p> </p><p>“Very well done, princess. Consider me impressed.” Sokka smiled warmly at her, leaning on his own staff.</p><p> </p><p>The sight caused the insidious dread to once again attempt to fill her mind, but she squashed it back and refused to give it a foothold.</p><p> </p><p>Instead she gave into her body's demand, and flopped down in the sand, laying on her back in the sun and closing her eyes as her heart rate came back down.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed at her display. “Ah yes, the classic starfish. I think all students of weaponry disciplines have achieved that state at some point.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko chuckled in agreement. “Oh, I can attest to that. Firebending and sword masters alike have brought me to that state more than a few times.”</p><p> </p><p>She heard Sokka getting closer, and felt the end of his staff tap her ankle. “Come on, you will feel better after a proper breakfast.”</p><p> </p><p>She made a disgruntled sound and brought her aching arms above her to sign. <em>“Carry me.”</em></p><p> </p><p>He tapped her ankle harder. “Are you a warrior or a damsel?”</p><p> </p><p>Her eyes were still closed but she rolled them anyway, and sighed.<em> “Can't I be both?”</em></p><p> </p><p>A shadow fell over her face, and she cracked an eye open to see his face peering down at her with a too-wide grin. “You asked for it.”</p><p> </p><p>His hands shot down and gripped her extended forearms, hauling her upwards so fast she was airborne for a moment before her hip landed hard on his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. She scrabbled for purchase on the cloth of his back but his arm wrapped securely around the backs of her legs to keep her balanced.</p><p> </p><p>She propped her head in her hand, putting her elbow against his back for support, before she gave into her fate as she was unceremoniously carried towards the palace.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko walked behind them, amusement and fondness painting his features, as he watched her exasperated expression.</p><p> </p><p>She mock-glared at him, signing from her perch as they walked. <em>“This one? Really?”</em></p><p> </p><p>He smiled, pink colouring his cheeks. Instead of speaking, he signed back to her.<em> “I like him.”</em></p><p> </p><p>And she really couldn't argue with that, so she just smiled back at him instead. <em>“Me too.”</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The fallout of adrenaline had left the pair of them ravenous.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had deposited the disgruntled princess onto her own feet when they made it to the kitchens, now bustling with a few staff and cooks.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko, having already eaten, snagged him at the door and caught him in a quick kiss, sending warmth flooding through Sokka at the casual affection. “I'm heading to the council early, see you in a bit?”</p><p> </p><p>He nodded, giving Zuko's hand a quick squeeze before they separated.</p><p> </p><p>Suki was already seated at the table, and Izumi had joined her, so Sokka sat across from the pair once he had filled his own plate.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi and Sokka both took down pretty sizable amounts of food, and while Suki didn't comment, she did look mildly disturbed at the sight of them eating like a pair of wolverines.</p><p> </p><p>When they finished, Sokka sat back in satisfaction, stretching with a groan. He looked at the two women across from him, and hesitated for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>He had to ask, he had to start somewhere, because he couldn't do it all on his own.</p><p> </p><p>“I need your help with something. Both of you.” They met his gaze with matching curiosity, and he continued. “There is something I want to do, but it needs to be done in a particular kind of place, and I don't know what would be suitable around here.”</p><p> </p><p>He explained what he wanted to search for, and Izumi was quick to tell him she could grab a few maps of nearby areas to look through.</p><p> </p><p>Suki, who knew exactly what he was after, gave him a small, secret smile, and nodded knowingly at him.</p><p> </p><p>Now or never.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*</p><p>Thanks so much everyone for following along with this fic! You have no idea how happy it makes me to have such a captive audience &lt;3</p><p>*</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Of Heartbeats and Hunters</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*</p><p>Thank you for your patience! This was a mammoth to edit, with the format I chose for this section ~le sigh~</p><p>Enjoy! </p><p>*</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>The week leading up to the festival flew past with how busy they were in preparation. The plans were in motion to take a full three days off for the entirety of the full moon, with the event happening on the last day.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko wanted to enjoy the entirety of it, but he also did not want to fall behind in his work or have it circling in the back of his mind, so he had thrown himself into getting as much done as possible ahead of time. Often in the last few days, he had stayed behind after the meetings to work alone in the chamber, or brought stacks of it back with him to his home.</p><p> </p><p>Which seemed to frustrate Sokka to no end.</p><p> </p><p>More than a few times this week, the warrior had made good on his earlier promise to drag Zuko out of his study and lock him out. On one particular occasion he had forcibly carried him all the way from the empty council room back up into the palace and up to his wing.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi had seen them arrive and had snorted in amusement.<em> “Do you solve all your problems this way?”</em></p><p> </p><p>“Hasn't failed me yet.” Zuko had heard the smugness coming from beneath him and had reached down to pinch Sokka's side, earning him a yelp in response.</p><p> </p><p>Most of Sokka's annoyance over this had more to do with losing track of where Zuko <em>was</em>, as well as the knowledge that he would continuously forget to eat, and sometimes fall asleep on a pile of papers instead of his bed.</p><p> </p><p>Which was how they somehow got to <em>this</em> compromise today. Zuko, attempting to do work, while simultaneously having Sokka wrapped around him like a mother hen turned octopus.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't lie and say it wasn't comfortable though, from where he was currently seated sideways on a couch in the main hall, leaning back against Sokka's chest with the warrior's limbs bracketing him on all sides. The warmth of the other man seeped into him through the cloth at his back, and Zuko couldn't help but enjoy the light scent of him as well, like sea air and storms.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko wasn't even working anymore tonight, he had already finished and set it aside. Now he was just reading a regular book, but Sokka hadn't seemed in a hurry to move from where he was breathing evenly against him. He had his chin hooked over Zuko's shoulder, hands resting folded across Zuko's stomach. He didn't know if Sokka was reading along with him or not, but he knew he was still awake by the way his fingers kept shifting against him.</p><p> </p><p>All week the warrior had been filled with an odd, frenetic, energy. As if he were nearly buzzing out of his skin. Zuko didn't know if it was excitement for the coming event, or something else entirely, but he had discovered a new super power in the process. In that he seemed to have an uncanny ability to calm the jittery man down simply by touching him.</p><p> </p><p>It hadn't taken him long to figure it out, either. That just slipping a hand into Sokka's, or running his fingers through his hair or down his spine, was enough to quiet the restlessness and reduce the warrior to something soft and calm in his arms.</p><p> </p><p>Not in a sexual way, either. Although that... <em>well</em>. That was something else entirely.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had never thought that he was a person with a terribly high libido, but apparently he was wrong.</p><p> </p><p>Very. Wrong.</p><p> </p><p>They were a different beast at night, behind the closed doors of Zuko's chambers. In the past week Zuko had lost count of the all the ways Sokka had taken him completely apart, and he loved every second of it.</p><p> </p><p>Even that morning, Zuko had woken to Sokka wrapped around him from behind, laying gentle kisses across his shoulder with one hand splayed across his chest where his fingers drifted slowly across Zuko's ribs. When Zuko had shifted slightly to look at him, Sokka had smiled playfully and changed direction, sliding down the bed and pushing Zuko over onto his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>His mouth had worked it's way down Zuko's spine, pressing into each of the notches, before he had drifted even lower and sunk his teeth lightly into Zuko's ass cheek.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had spread him open with his hands, lightly touched where Zuko was still a bit sore from the night previous, before he had pressed in and swiped a hot tongue directly against him in a slow drag.</p><p> </p><p>It had been so ridiculously good, Zuko had accidentally charred a bit of the headboard where his hands had held on for dear life.</p><p> </p><p>Much to Sokka's delight.</p><p> </p><p>They had been hard pressed to get out of bed afterwards and attempt to begin the day at <em>all</em>.</p><p> </p><p>And it had made the following council meeting a new trial in composure.</p><p> </p><p>Even with the idle conversation and chatter, Zuko had very deliberately not looked anywhere near Sokka to try and avoid letting his thoughts run back to a couple hours before. It was bad enough being able to feel the soreness in his muscles, and the new set of sucked marks laying just below his collar line.</p><p> </p><p>He thought he had held up fairly well until they had concluded the meeting and Tai had leaned over to him. “I am happy for you, Zuko. It seems you have made quite the match.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had groaned and scrubbed a hand down his face. “Am I that obvious?” They hadn't made any extreme efforts to hide it over the past week, but they weren't directly blatant with each other in public either.</p><p> </p><p>Tai had just laughed and patted him on the shoulder. “To the untrained eye, probably not, but there have been so many bets placed on the two of you that the council has been watching you like hawks.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had not managed to resist the urge to lay his head in his hands as he flushed red. “Do I even want to know who won?”</p><p> </p><p>“Azir and Nila tied for second and made a decent amount.” He had cleared his throat pointedly. “As for the winner... that would be me.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had lifted his head to slide an incredulous look at the elderly man. “Seriously?”</p><p> </p><p>“I placed mine on Sokka's first day here, I had a pretty good hunch when he nearly stabbed Tu Lan.” Tai had in no way looked repentant, amused eyes crinkling at the corners. “Besides which, I'm old! I reserve the right to hope for happiness for the young. And as I said, you are a good match.”</p><p> </p><p>Then he had smiled in his vague way, and left without any further elaboration.<br/><br/></p><p>Thinking back, there had been something odd about Tai's expression during their conversation. As if there was just a bit of distant sadness mingling with the mirth behind his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was distracted from his own thoughts when Sokka's hand lifted to gently close the book that was still in Zuko's lap. “Hey!”</p><p> </p><p>A warm laugh sounded against his shoulder. “You haven't flipped a page in five minutes, I think you are done for the night.” He slid the tome free from Zuko's fingers and placed it on the table beside them. Sokka didn't make any move to get up though, instead nudging his nose into the side of Zuko's neck and returning his hands to hold around his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko leaned more fully against him, relaxing into the touch. He could feel the gentle beat of a heart against his back, and even as he thought it, he felt Sokka loosen a bit and allow him to feel it fully, running like sparks all the way to his fingertips. He sighed in contentment and brought his own hands up to thread through both of the warrior's.</p><p> </p><p>He couldn't help but feel the tinge of restlessness remaining in the man behind him. Only slightly, just in the uptick of his pulse, and the way his muscles shifted minutely as if itching to move. Zuko's brows knit together, as he felt the flex of Sokka's arms tighten around him a bit more. He squeezed Sokka's hands lightly, before releasing them to sit up and turn around.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko watched him carefully, though he wasn't able to read anything from Sokka's expression. He slid a hand up to cradle the side of his face, half smiling when the other man pushed into the contact and closed his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>It didn't take a genius to see that he was tangling intensely with his own thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko let his thumb run gently below his eye. “Are you going to tell me what's going on? You've been acting strange all week.” As he watched, Sokka inhaled slowly and blew it out through his nose. Stormy eyes opened, bright in the dim evening light, looking up to meet his stare.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's worry grew as he saw a hint of fear behind the blue gray gaze. “Sokka?”</p><p> </p><p>He could feel him tapping a nonsense rhythm where his hand rested against his thigh. His jaw worked for a moment before he finally answered. “Are you tired?”</p><p> </p><p>Which was not at all a response he had envisioned. Zuko cocked his head to the side and raised an eyebrow. “No?” Which was mostly true. His eyes were tired, more than anything, but he was feeling more awake by the second.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sat up, slow enough for Zuko to adjust back to make space for him. “If I asked, would you go somewhere with me? Tonight?” It seemed like an innocuous question, but the intensity of Sokka's tone made it seem anything but.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko desperately wanted to pry for more information, but he held back the impulse. He had already promised to let Sokka reveal what he wanted of his own volition, he couldn't back track on that now.</p><p> </p><p>His curiosity mixed uncomfortably with concern, but he steadied himself to answer. “Yes. Of course I would.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded, though it seemed more to himself than anything. He leaned forward, resting his forehead lightly against Zuko's temple.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dusk had settled into night as they made their way from the city.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko had grabbed a fairly heavy cloak before they left, and he drew it slightly closer around him as the brisker night air drew heat away. The sky above them was crystal clear, and the further they made it from the light of civilization, the more stars he could see glowing against the black. The moon itself sat heavy, one day away from being full, and lit the path fairly well as the pair continued.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had brought his sword and a small satchel, as well as his own heavier coat for the trek. He hadn't said anything since they had left the grounds of the palace, but he kept his hand threaded tightly through Zuko's, as if he was afraid he would disappear if he let go.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko still hadn't pressed, though he was dying to know where they were going.</p><p> </p><p>They had been travelling for at least a couple hours, when Sokka turned them off the rural road towards a mountain path. It was a heavily forested area, and as they set foot into the treeline, all the visible light was gone in an instant.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko lifted a hand to draw fire into it, but Sokka stopped him before he could. “Do you trust me?”</p><p> </p><p>He could barely see him when he turned to look, shadow clinging to every inch of his skin, except for his eyes, which reflected the last remnants of silvery star and moonlight.</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.” Zuko was no longer surprised at how easily that came to him. Though, thinking back, there had never been a moment since the very first time they'd met where he <em>hadn't</em>. As if his own subconscious had known, irrefutably, that he was safe with Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>The hand in his own tugged him tighter into Sokka's side, as he was led into the dark.</p><p> </p><p>As they made their way further and further into pitch blackness, Zuko's eyes kept wandering to their surroundings, no longer able to make anything out. It was disorienting, but Sokka kept them directly on the path, and it didn't take long for Zuko to realize that Sokka could <em>see</em>.</p><p> </p><p>The understanding sent a thread of anticipation through him, because this was a piece, wasn't it? A little section of the puzzle being offered for free, and Zuko was desperate for more. He still said nothing, though the urge to grab Sokka by the shoulders and shake the answers from him was starting to become overbearing.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually, the trees gave way to an open glade, with a small mountain pond at it's centre. A watering hole, Zuko guessed, for the inhabitants of the forest. The entire area was flooded with light from the moon, and Zuko was grateful to have his faculties returned as he turned to look at Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>And stopped.</p><p> </p><p>The silver light from above bathed Sokka in an ethereal glow, making his eyes shine bright in the dark. Zuko had once thought that he looked near god-like at night, but right now, there was no doubt.</p><p> </p><p>He was so stunning, Zuko's breath caught for a moment at the sight of him.</p><p> </p><p>He was also watching Zuko, carefully, and finally after a moment, spoke.</p><p> </p><p>“I want to tell you a story, Zuko. But it's not going to be...” Sokka clenched his fists at his sides, looking away. “It's going to be uncomfortable, maybe even painful, but I can't think of any other way to do this.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko could feel fear, cold and acidic, laying like a stone in his belly- except, that was strange, because he wasn't afraid. He was confused, and nervous, and apprehensive, but not <em>fearful</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sucked in a sharp breath, as he realized that it wasn't <em>his</em> fear he was feeling.</p><p> </p><p>He took a cautious step towards Sokka, speaking quietly, though it cut like a knife through the silence. “Why are you afraid?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka let loose a tremulous breath, before closing the gap between them and kissing Zuko soundly, hard enough that he had to brace one foot behind him to keep balanced. He allowed it for a moment, the desperate pull of the man against him, before he gently pushed him back and cupped his face in his hands. “Sokka, it's okay. Whatever it is, just tell me.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded, and rested his forehead against Zuko's lightly. “I'm sorry. For how this is going to be.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko opened his mouth to ask something further, but stopped abruptly as he felt something flooding into all of his senses.</p><p> </p><p>Because Sokka was not just loosening his hold on the link between them, he was letting go of it entirely, and it slammed into Zuko with so much force it felt like lightning had stuck him in the chest.</p><p> </p><p>As his vision whited out, he vaguely registered his hands dropping away from Sokka's face as the warrior leaned closer to whisper in his ear.</p><p> </p><p>“I'm so sorry.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He is small, and a beautiful woman with brown hair and Sokka's eyes is looking down at him, smiling. She points upwards, where a full pale moon rests in the clear cold sky. “You are just as much <em>her</em> child, as mine.” She brings her hand down to rest on his small chest. “You are like your grandmother. Which means you will love Tui, and protect her, with all that you have. But that isn't everything.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Kanna takes him out of the village and into the snow, in the black of night. She leads him far away from prying eyes until the wind sets in and covers her words.</p><p> </p><p>“You must never tell anyone, Sokka. It is a secret kept by us, <em>for</em> us. We are so few as is, and though we are stronger, and faster, it doesn't mean that we cannot be bested.”</p><p> </p><p>She kneels with him on the tundra, grinning wide with too many teeth. “We are <em>hunters</em>, not prey.”</p><p> </p><p>And she teaches him how to give into the pull against his heart. Shift into something much more suited to the wildness in them both.</p><p> </p><p>They sprint even further into the storm, and Sokka feels the burn in all four of his legs as he howls into the sky.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There are raiders, Fire Nation, tasked with hunting the last water bender in the tribe.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's sister.</p><p> </p><p>He is strong, and quick, but he is still small, and he defends his home and his family alongside his father, but-</p><p> </p><p>“No! No! <em>Mom</em>!”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>His father is a hollow-eyed thing.</p><p> </p><p>Hakoda loves them, but war is ever present, and Sokka knows that the drive behind him is more vengeance than anything else when he sets sail away from them.</p><p> </p><p>When he leaves Sokka to fend for his sister.</p><p> </p><p>At the very least he has his grandmother, who is like him, who <em>feels</em> like he does.</p><p> </p><p>More often then not, they both shift at night, her white fur mingling with his black as she curls around him.</p><p> </p><p>It is a comfort, family is a different type of anchor, but he knows that something different waits for him somewhere.</p><p> </p><p>Someone who is his.</p><p> </p><p>Someone who he belongs to.</p><p> </p><p>He wonders what they'll be like.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There is a boy in the ice.</p><p> </p><p>Aang is such an outlier. Regardless of being the Avatar, it is so strange to meet someone so filled with joy and hope, not brought to heel by the crushing weight of the world.</p><p> </p><p>He is playful, and youthful, and an easy person to like, and Sokka if overjoyed at making a friend like him.</p><p> </p><p>Aang needs to be schooled in bending of all kinds, which means he needs to leave.</p><p> </p><p><em>They</em>, need to leave.</p><p> </p><p>Aang will need protection, and who better than someone like Sokka. Someone who can withstand so much more than the average person.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe that will be his purpose for now.</p><p> </p><p>He wonders if he will meet the one meant for him, if he travels far enough.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He has been all over, and hasn't felt anything towards anyone.</p><p> </p><p>If the others notice his growing melancholy, they say nothing.</p><p> </p><p>He does meet a girl with red hair, and eyes of steel, who kicks his ass better than anyone ever has before. A Kyoshi warrior in the Earth Kingdom.</p><p> </p><p>“My name is Suki.”</p><p> </p><p>They are fast friends. Like seeks like. Hurt seeks hurt. People torn apart by wars made from generations before.</p><p> </p><p>“Would you teach me to fight? With weapons like yours?” Because he is strong, and fast, but he doesn't know how to use it, not really, not being in <em>this</em> body.</p><p> </p><p>She does.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He wanders the world, meets all sorts of people, waiting to feel the pull his grandmother had always told him about.</p><p> </p><p>He thinks, <em>Maybe they are already gone. Maybe I lost them to the war before I ever got to meet them.</em></p><p> </p><p>His hope dwindles with every new face.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They are in the belly of the beast. A special invitation to the Avatar to train in the newly overthrown Fire Nation.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka can plainly see the political gambit of course, a show of peace under new management, but Aang must be taught, so they arrive regardless of their distrust.</p><p> </p><p>His instincts are running at an all time high, wary of threats in every direction as they make their way into the city.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe that was why, he didn't notice.</p><p> </p><p>Not at first.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Iroh is nothing like Sokka had imagined. The air of gentle kindness he exudes seems at odds with being the brother of Ozai. It makes it difficult to dislike him.</p><p> </p><p>He has quite a task ahead of him, the reforming of a nation, but Sokka's distrust of him slowly evaporates as he watches him begin to train Aang.</p><p> </p><p>It is tranquil to watch, as he and the girls sit to the side to view. Iroh is quiet and humble, but <em>powerful</em>. His teaching style suits Aang very well.</p><p> </p><p>As his unease blows away, Sokka begins to feel strange. Like his very bones are aching, or pulling him somehow.</p><p> </p><p>He frowns and wonders if he is sick...</p><p> </p><p>Can he <em>get</em> sick?</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He has been told not to wander, so that is exactly what he must do.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka is an obstinate thing at his core.</p><p> </p><p>He slinks through the darkened night passageways of the palace, able to hear footfalls of guards and inhabitants from far away, and avoids them all.</p><p> </p><p>The second he sets foot in the main hall, he feels something. An ache in his chest, zipping pain down both of his arms.</p><p> </p><p>There is something here... something he needs.</p><p> </p><p>He barely registers himself moving, further and further in, quiet as silk.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka finds himself in an odd stretch of rooms, filled with weird herbal smells that tingle his nostrils.</p><p> </p><p>An infirmary, he would guess.</p><p> </p><p>His feet keep moving without his input, and carry him to a door.</p><p> </p><p>Opening it is cataclysmic.</p><p> </p><p>The room is dark, and warm, and heavy with the stench of sickness, and fever, and <em>despair</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka staggers in, making it a few steps before his knees give out beside the bed placed in the middle of the room.</p><p> </p><p>There is someone there.</p><p> </p><p>A boy, covered in blankets, with thick white bandages covering one side of his face. Sweat beads along the exposed skin of his throat and chest, which is flushed fever red. His brow is furrowed, visible eye tightening in pain as he mumbles nonsense in whatever delirium has entered his mind.</p><p> </p><p>He is beautiful.</p><p> </p><p>But he is hurt, so badly, and Sokka reaches a desperate hand up, touching the boy's wrist to try and take the pain, but as soon as their skin touches he feels a link snap into place between them, like a tether crafted from diamonds.</p><p> </p><p>He gasps and tries to breathe, as his mind becomes a whirlwind of feeling and memory, all of it distorted in fever dream.</p><p> </p><p>Of, <em>“Please! Father, I'm sorry I spoke out of turn.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Of kneeling before Ozai and begging for forgiveness even as fire lashed out and scorched his face.</p><p> </p><p>Of screaming, unending pain, both physical and emotional, knowing he would never be forgiven.</p><p> </p><p>Of falling into unconsciousness, with just the barest vision of his uncle and cousin storming in from the stands.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's hand clutches the clammy one resting on the bed and he shuts his eyes tightly against the torrent of agony that slams into him.</p><p> </p><p>That means... that means this is <em>Zuko</em>. Ozai's son and heir to the throne, but how could any father hurt their son so badly, ruin him in such a way?</p><p> </p><p>He can barely breathe, knowledge and fury burning through every inch of him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka doesn't understand what's happening, he doesn't <em>understand</em>, except-</p><p> </p><p>Oh.</p><p> </p><p><em>Oh</em>.</p><p> </p><p>His eyes fly back open, and he can feel the dampness of his cheeks as he stares at the person in front of him.</p><p> </p><p>And he thinks, <em>this one. This one is mine.</em></p><p> </p><p>He stands on shaky legs and hauls himself onto the bed beside him, not even noticing the ripping sound of his clothing as he shifts without a thought. He curls tightly into Zuko's side, laying his head across the blanket covered chest to feel the weak, but steady, beat of the heart beneath his jaw.</p><p> </p><p>He feels his own rise to meet it, thrumming in time.</p><p> </p><p>Its so perfect, so right, like a piece of him he hadn't even realized was missing until right this second.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>A pull like no other.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He whines, high and distressed, as he pulls pain from him, as much as he can, past what he should, more and more until darkness starts to creep into the corners of his vision.</p><p> </p><p>The last thing he thinks before he fades into the black is,<em> I will protect you, I promise, no one will ever do that to you again.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Hands shake him lightly, and Sokka lashes out and snaps at the intruder before he even registers what's happening.</p><p> </p><p>“Easy now, young master, I am not here to hurt you.”</p><p> </p><p>His eyes crack open and he sees Iroh, standing at the bedside with a curious expression on his face. Sokka rests back against Zuko and watches him warily, and it isn't until a low growl rumbles from him that he realizes exactly what it is Iroh is staring at.</p><p> </p><p>His chest seizes in panic as he scrambles backwards off the bed , falling off onto his haunches. His ears flatten as he shrinks back in fear.</p><p> </p><p>Iroh holds both hands in front of him in a placating gesture. “It's quite alright, I mean you no harm Sokka.” His eyes twinkle with amusement. “Though, you might want to change back before the nurses make their way down here. There are clothes in the wardrobe behind you.” He pointedly turns his back, giving Sokka space.</p><p> </p><p>He takes it gratefully, snapping back to himself easier than ever before. He glances down at Zuko, still unconscious, but the red hue of fever had dissipated, and the scent of infection had all but disappeared.</p><p> </p><p>He had helped, at least.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stands properly, and retrieves some clothing to cover himself. Uncertainty creeps into him as he takes one last look at the sleeping prince before he makes his way over to Iroh, who appraises him with an unreadable expression.</p><p> </p><p>“I think we had best sit down for a chat, hmm? Maybe some tea in the gardens would be nice.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka is led out of the palace and sits with the stand-in firelord beneath a shady tree. Iroh says nothing, but hands him a steaming mug.</p><p> </p><p>In the light of day, his thoughts betray him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko is a prince.</p><p> </p><p>He is a <em>prince, </em>who will one day be<em> Firelord.</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka can't- he<em> can't.</em></p><p> </p><p>He can still feel the link between them, and feels almost nauseous when he forces himself to close it off, even as his heart breaks a little.</p><p> </p><p>Looking at Iroh, his stomach knots with anxiety as he waits for repercussion for his actions, but none comes.</p><p> </p><p>Iroh eventually looks over at him and smiles. “I don't know whether to be upset with the guards for their lack of attention, or impressed at your ability to infiltrate unseen past all of them. I think I will go with the latter.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka startles, trying to find his voice. “You... you aren't angry?”</p><p> </p><p>“For what? A young man letting curiosity get the best of him?” Iroh laughs. “I have far bigger fish to fry.”</p><p> </p><p>“But, I...” Shifted. <em>You saw, you know, what I am.</em></p><p> </p><p>“I have been around a long time, Sokka, and I have seen a lot of extraordinary things. While I am not entirely certain what just happened, it is fairly obvious that you were not there to hurt Zuko, and that is the only thing I care about.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stares at him. “<em>Hurt</em> him? I-I wouldn't, I <em>couldn't</em>, who would do that?”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh's gentle gaze turns somber. “Many, I'm afraid. He is to be Firelord, once he has recovered. And that has placed quite a target on his back. We have the support of the vast majority, but plenty of Ozai's faithful are brewing descent in the nation, trying to garner support against us.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka frowns, staring down at the mug in his hands. He suddenly felt very young.</p><p> </p><p>Iroh leans forward, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Zuko will need help, will need people on his side, friends he can trust.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka so badly wants to be what Iroh is implying, but he knows it's impossible. His chest tightens in pain even as he says the words. “I can't stay here. I can't be this close to him, not without...”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh sips his tea quietly, but he sends Sokka a look of gentle concern. “There is something between you yes? Something that ties your spirits, I would assume. Would it not be worth it to at least speak to him about it?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka shakes his head, starting to feel frantic. “I can't just install myself into his life! You said yourself he is going to be Firelord, and I am just-” Nothing. He is nothing and no one. A moon bound boy from the Water Tribe who's soulmate is the future ruler of a nation.</p><p> </p><p>Life is unbearably cruel.</p><p> </p><p>He pulls in a shuddering breath, wiping his forearm across his suddenly damp face. He is adamant when he speaks this time. “I need to leave. Please. There must be someone else that you would trust with Aang's training? Someone far away?”</p><p> </p><p>Iroh sighs heavily and nods. “Yes. I can arrange it.” His expression turns immeasurably sad. “I cannot force you to stay, and it wouldn't be fair even if I could, but please promise it won't be forever? That you will return one day?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka thinks of Zuko, so hurt, so beautiful, and how his soul longs to drag him back to the room he just left. He can't have what he wants, he can't have <em>him</em>.</p><p> </p><p>He thinks, <em>But I can</em> <em>love him from afar, even if he never knows it.</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka doesn't respond to Iroh's question, because every answer ends with maybe.</p><p> </p><p>Instead, he says, “We travel constantly. If I hear any information that I think you need to know, or gossip about Ozai supporters, I can send it your way?” Because this is something he can do. He can help uproot the corruption, to give peace a fighting chance.</p><p> </p><p>To give Zuko the time he needs to truly make a difference.</p><p> </p><p>Iroh, if anything, looks even more troubled, but agrees.</p><p> </p><p>Later, when the group is flying to their new destination on Appa, Sokka rolls a pai sho piece back and forth between his fingers.</p><p> </p><p>A white lotus.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He makes good on his offer. Anytime he hears something of interest, or notices a suspicious person, he sends word back to Iroh. Letters, all addressed to the fire, unsigned except for crude doodle of two fangs at the bottom of the page.</p><p> </p><p>He is alone once, travelling into a small town market for supplies, when he overhears a group of mercenaries speaking about the royal family.</p><p> </p><p>From this distance he can make out the conversation, and it takes him only seconds to put together a plot to stage a riot at Zuko's upcoming coronation.</p><p> </p><p>Rage, red hot like lava, fills him entirely.</p><p> </p><p>He slinks quietly closer, waiting until they disperse into a bar, but one is left in an alleyway as lookout.</p><p> </p><p>It takes no effort to grab the man and shove him hard into the wall. He snarls into his face as the stranger's shock dissipates into confusion.</p><p> </p><p>“Who the fuck are you?”</p><p> </p><p>“No one.” His muscles tighten as he hurls the man across the alley where he crashes through some wooden crates, landing in a pained sprawl on the ground.</p><p> </p><p>The noise alerts his companions, and Sokka feels them coming, but his fury is so consuming he can't force himself to leave. They round the corner, one by one, and Sokka throws himself into the fight.</p><p> </p><p>He is all power, no finesse, and they land plenty of good hits on him as well, but he comes out the victor regardless. He leaves them in a broken heap, all still breathing, but bloodied.</p><p> </p><p>Because he is many monstrous things, but he is not a killer.</p><p> </p><p>He limps back to the group empty handed, but they say nothing, even if they are thinking nearly loud enough for Sokka to hear.</p><p> </p><p>He quietly sits by himself, and writes a new letter.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Aang's training is complete, after a time, and Sokka is left to find a new path.</p><p> </p><p>Finding one is not a challenge, considering how often he has had similar brawls over the past year.</p><p> </p><p>Assembling a team isn't difficult either, there are plenty of people eager for purpose in the fallout of war.</p><p> </p><p>Suki is the first one he attempts to contact, and she is quick to agree. She also points him towards a few of her own trusted contacts to fill some spots.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn't want a lot of people, just enough, and soon he has a modest ship with a small team of highly skilled individuals. On paper, all of them are soldiers, in reality they are a mixed bag of all nationalities and talents, united in a purpose.</p><p> </p><p>They have all lost something, to the conflict. Parents. Brothers. Sisters. Family and friends. They know that nothing they do will bring them back, but that isn't what this is about. It is far easier to stare down the ghosts, if you can promise that you will do everything you can, to stop it from happening to anyone else.</p><p> </p><p>They work tirelessly to keep the peace, between all nations. And from that surface perspective, it is a very selfless thing they are doing.</p><p> </p><p>Beneath it all, Sokka quietly thinks that at least he can do this. He can continue keeping Zuko safe, cutting threats off at the pass, before they even get close.</p><p> </p><p><em>He</em>, is the only selfish one.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka wonders what Zuko looks like now, healed, and a little bit older.</p><p> </p><p>He thinks, <em>he's still beautiful, I know he is.</em></p><p> </p><p>He ignores the gnawing ache in his chest, the growing hollowness of distance.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka does scar. It is something he discovers, as time goes on. That he is not invulnerable.</p><p> </p><p>If he is hurt badly enough, and his healing can't keep up, he will be left with a mark.</p><p> </p><p>Over time, his body becomes a map of all the ways he should have died, but carried on in spite of it.</p><p> </p><p>It is how Suki finds out about him. Though how he made it this long without her suspecting is a miracle in and of itself.</p><p> </p><p>He takes a blow meant for her, sword slamming hard into his side, enough to cut through the leather of his armour and slice him open below his ribs.</p><p> </p><p>He falls to the ground with a grunt, and she looses a spear straight through the man, pinning him to the wall behind as she drops to her knees beside Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>She is panicking, tearing the cloth away from the wound, and Sokka grabs her hands even as it sends pain ripping up his side at the movement. “I'm fine, I'm okay Suk, watch.”</p><p> </p><p>And she does, sees the skin knit back together, leaving only a pale silver scar where it was.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Explanations are had, and Suki sits quietly through them all. When he finishes, she says nothing, but wraps her arms around him.</p><p> </p><p>She is his best friend, and his second in command. Makes the hard decisions sometimes so he doesn't have to.</p><p> </p><p>Because he will not take a life, but sometimes, a life <em>must</em> be taken, and she will do it when he won't.</p><p> </p><p>He asked her once, how she could. How she has the strength to do so.</p><p> </p><p>Her eyes had turned to stone, staring off in the distance. Quietly, she said, “Who is there left, to judge me? If I have to kill one person to protect millions, I will. Simple as that.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka didn't think it <em>was</em> that simple, but he is so incredibly grateful to have her.</p><p> </p><p>She takes this truth in stride, and simply says, “Thank you for telling me.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They travel through ocean, and desert, and tundra.</p><p> </p><p>Seeing the fruits of their labours bolsters them, as peace remains and strengthens around the world, though it is not without cost.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka has gotten used to being this. A hound on the hunt, flushing prey out of the grass to be taken down, shackled, imprisoned.</p><p> </p><p>He is excellent at it, and slowly but surely they begin to run out of possible leads.</p><p> </p><p>Which leaves him feeling wilder than ever.</p><p> </p><p>Because Sokka begins to feel like he was granted a leash, that has slowly shortened over time, and he is terrified of what will happen to him if he is forced to remain idle.</p><p> </p><p>If there is no one left to occupy his thoughts away from the one thing he wants but can't have.</p><p> </p><p>It comes to a head when he returns to the South with his crew to visit for a festival. When he breaks down in Kanna's arms.</p><p> </p><p>Afterwards, he takes her advice, and sets sail to the North.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They have made a name for themselves, so they are granted entry into the frozen city.</p><p> </p><p>As they disembark, a small procession of official looking people make their way to the docks to greet them.</p><p> </p><p>He puts on his most cordial face, and steps forward to introduce himself when he notices <em>her</em>.</p><p> </p><p>She is beautiful, silver white hair cascading down her back, in stark contrast to the rich darkness of her skin. She stands tall and proud as she steps forward to greet him, when she too pauses, eyes widening.</p><p> </p><p>Because she is like him.</p><p> </p><p>He can hear it, in the way her heart beats, stronger, and just a bit slower, than her companions.</p><p> </p><p>She cocks her head to the side and studies him, a careful smile growing across her face. “Greetings, Sokka of the South, I am Chief Yue.”</p><p> </p><p>She holds an arm out to him, and he clasps her forearm in greeting, grinning back as she holds tight enough to bruise. Testing him.</p><p> </p><p>“Greetings, Chief Yue, thank you for granting us permission to be here.” He releases her, but does not back away. His excitement grows by the second, and he knows she can hear it from the amusement in her eyes.</p><p> </p><p>The pair of them stand in an odd stare down for a moment, before she gives slightly and rolls her eyes, though only he can see it. “I have heard of the exploits of you and your team, and I have to admit I was curious.” She looks him up and down. “Even more so now, I will have to find time to speak with you properly later.”</p><p> </p><p>The intention is obvious. Sokka nods, “Of course, I would be happy to.”</p><p> </p><p>She looks like she was about to respond further, but footsteps sound behind Sokka, crunching lightly in the snow as Suki arrives beside him.</p><p> </p><p>Yue sucks in a sharp breath that only Sokka can hear, as her wide eyes lock onto the Kyoshi warrior.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka can feel the uptick of Yue's heart, and he <em>knows</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Suki startles a bit at the intensity of the gaze on her, but gathers herself quickly. She holds out a hand in greeting as well, and Yue takes a careful step forward to clasp her forearm, far more gently than she had with him.</p><p> </p><p>He watches curiously as they touch, but Suki doesn't react any differently, so he assumes Yue is holding back.</p><p> </p><p>Smart, as this is definitely not the time or place, but he hopes she won't wait long.</p><p> </p><p>He is aware of the hypocrisy of the thought.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They are led to the heart of the city, into a palace of ice, and given quarters for their stay.</p><p> </p><p>Night falls quickly this far towards the pole, and Sokka is not surprised when a light knock sounds on his door as the sun sets below the horizon.</p><p> </p><p>Yue stands on the other side, less formal this time in simple navy robes. “Come with me.”</p><p> </p><p>He doesn't ask, but he could guess where they are headed as they travel quietly through the night.</p><p> </p><p>The cave is oddly warm, as they enter, a shock of green, lit by the moonlight steaming in from above. At the centre, a deep pool sits, water still and dark.</p><p> </p><p>Yue casts a look at him, raising a brow. “Shift with me? We are known here, the North has always been a sanctuary for us, so we are protected under law. Though, I've never... I've never met another. Only heard stories.”</p><p> </p><p>He looks back at her in surprise, he hadn't known that. He wonders why his grandmother had never mentioned it. Sokka looked out into the dark water. “She is here, isn't she.”</p><p> </p><p>She nods, “The manifestation of her spirit is, yes.” She turns her back to him, and begins to unfasten her clothing.</p><p> </p><p>He turns as well, offering privacy as he strips himself, shifting into his night black form as he drops onto all fours. He stretches for a moment, before curiosity makes him turn back around.</p><p> </p><p>She is different from him, snow white with aquamarine eyes, a little bit smaller, and more lithe. She appraises him equally, padding up to him and touching her nose gently to his.</p><p> </p><p>He snorts in amusement and presses his head to hers happily, feeling more comfortable and alive than he had in months.</p><p> </p><p>She leads him to the edge of the pool, laying in a way that lets her paws just barely touch the water. He mirrors her, leaning against her side, and watches as a ripple begins to slice through the dark stillness.</p><p> </p><p>Two koi, white and black just like them, slowly rise to the surface, visible in the moonlight glinting off the water. The pool itself begins to glow faintly, and Sokka can feel a rush of sensation travelling up his legs from the water. A cool calm flows through him, and he rests his head down in his paws, gazing out at the tranquil motion of the two circling spirits.</p><p> </p><p>Yue leans more heavily against him, loosing a breath and closing her eyes. He follows suit, mind peaceful, falling gently into slumber.</p><p> </p><p>In his dreams he remembers the feel of a young heart, beating beneath his jaw, and whines his grief into the quiet cave.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Yue has been trailing after Suki like a lost turtleduck for weeks, before Sokka loses his patience.</p><p> </p><p>“Will you just tell her, already?” His tone is sharper than he means, but it gets the point across when she snaps her gaze to his.</p><p> </p><p>“You know?”</p><p> </p><p>“Even without the constant doe eyes, it doesn't take a genius to see what's going on, Yue.” He rolls his eyes. “She already knows about me, so that is half the battle done.”</p><p> </p><p>She flushes and picks at a loose thread on her tunic. “I never thought I would... I have never left the North. I assumed I would never meet them.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka hadn't thought of that. He had travelled everywhere in search, he didn't know how she could stand it, to be trapped in this ice fortress, knowing someone was waiting elsewhere. “My grandmother would tell you that it is fate. That we always find them.”</p><p> </p><p>“Does that mean you did?”</p><p> </p><p>He freezes in place, back stiffening as his gaze slips away from her to the wall.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka knows she can feel his tension, bleeding out into the room.</p><p> </p><p>Her hand touches his shoulder gently. “Sokka?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.” There is an edge to his voice that he can't seem to stop. “I did.”</p><p> </p><p>Yue though, is used to his moodiness and takes it in stride. “Will you tell me who it is?”</p><p> </p><p>The most beautiful person Sokka has ever seen. Someone who feels like home to his aching heart.</p><p> </p><p>“Someone I cannot have.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Maybe he shouldn't have insisted.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe he should have explained the other part of this to Suki first.</p><p> </p><p>Because she is a frantic, panicking thing, barging into his room in the middle of the night.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka jumps out of bed as she slides down the wall, covering her face in her hands as gasping sobs wrack her frame. He drops to his knees in front of her and eases her arms down.</p><p> </p><p>Her gaze is red-rimmed and a thousand miles from here.</p><p> </p><p>“She saw it <em>all</em> Sokka, everything I've done, I-” She still isn't looking at him, but her hands grip his biceps, nails biting in. “I didn't realize, when you told me about him, that it meant you could be in each other's <em>heads</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>He doesn't know what to say. He doesn't know how to fix this. “If she is in your head, then you know it doesn't matter. You know she loves you, regardless.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki's gaze finally snaps to his and she is <em>vicious</em>. “I know that! I can feel it, I can't <em>stop</em> feeling it.” Her panic and desperation sit heavy in the room, and Sokka can smell the bitter salt of her tears. “I can't be this for her, Sokka. I have done terrible things, and did them knowing I would end this life alone. She is the ruler of the North, and it <em>does</em> matter.”</p><p> </p><p>His jaw clenches, because she doesn't understand, not really, how deep this goes for people like them. But he can't force her into this.</p><p> </p><p>She makes the decision. “I want to leave, Sokka. Please. I can't be here.”</p><p> </p><p>His own words hit harder being returned to him.</p><p> </p><p>He thinks. <em>You are my greatest fear come to life.</em></p><p> </p><p>He thinks. <em>You are me.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Suki and the other crew depart in the early morning light, setting sail to warmer climates.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stays behind.</p><p> </p><p>Because aside from a few dead leads, there was no one left for him to bring down, and here was as good a place as any to stay anchored for a time.</p><p> </p><p>The other part of his decision is Yue, because he knows exactly what she is feeling, and forcing her to go through it alone is something Sokka will not do.</p><p> </p><p>In public, she is the same radiant Chief she has always been, ruling with equal parts kindness and power.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka can tell the difference though, even if no one else can. He feels the pain and heartbreak, radiating off her like an arctic wind.</p><p> </p><p>At night the mask slips away entirely, and she is a shell of a person. She will shift and curl into a tight ball to sleep, and Sokka is always quick to follow suit, wrapping around her and stealing as much pain as he can.</p><p> </p><p>Months go by, and slowly he watches her return, just a bit, every day.</p><p> </p><p>He receives word from his former second in command. That she has taken a post as a royal guard in the Fire Nation, by way of his recommendation to Iroh.</p><p> </p><p>He tries and fails not to feel a sense of relief, at the extra layer of security.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka is still a selfish thing, when it comes to Zuko.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Tui is screaming.</p><p> </p><p>It fills both of their heads like ice, as they bolt from Yue's chambers.</p><p> </p><p>Clothes rip and fall off as they shift in unison, dashing towards their goddess.</p><p> </p><p>Yue is smaller than him, a bit faster, she is running so hard her feet are leaving red marks in the ice where the pads are being cut from the force of her sprint.</p><p> </p><p>The city is chaos, alarms ringing, and fire brightens the night sky.</p><p> </p><p>He can feel it, what is happening, he knows, because Tui is in his head, flooding him with images, and intention.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka is not a killer. He is <em>not</em>.</p><p> </p><p>But, oh, what this man wants.</p><p> </p><p>Sacrifice. Life for life. A spirit for a dead man. A moon for a Phoenix.</p><p> </p><p><em>No</em>.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Yue reaches them first. A pair, man and woman, turn to meet her just outside the cave's entrance on the ice cliffs.</p><p> </p><p>She snarls and launches at them, but a gout of flame sears up her side as she tackles the woman to the ground. Her scream is deafening, and Sokka can smell the burning flesh and roars as his vision bleeds red.</p><p> </p><p>He slams himself into the man, teeth gnashing in his face as his claws find purchase in the plate of his armour.</p><p> </p><p>He forces him further and further back, fire missing him by scant inches every second, and he can still hear the pair tangling behind him.</p><p> </p><p>The man is nearing the cliff edge when Sokka takes a lunge at him, noticing the glint of metal a second too late as a knife plunges into his chest. He howls in pain, and the man begins to laugh, eyes wide and manic as he lifts his hand, fire forming a ball in his palm.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka is not a killer.</p><p> </p><p>But.</p><p> </p><p>One last push, one last chance, and his teeth tear into the man's throat, silencing him. His eyes stare in shock when Sokka releases him, body giving way and falling backwards, slipping from the cliffs into the ocean below.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka shifts back with an agonized scream, dropping to his knees and ripping the blade from below his collar bone. Blood, sticky and hot, flows freely from the wound, his healing not able to keep up with the damage.</p><p> </p><p>A tortured cry comes from behind him as the woman screams. <em>“No!” </em>She turns to Sokka, catching his gaze with confusion and fury as she runs past him, diving off the edge after the man.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka slumps in relief. His vision starts to go spotty, and he has a growing numbness in his limbs, as he starts to crawl back to Yue.</p><p> </p><p>She has shifted back as well. She lays, naked and trembling in the snow, the left side of her body a burned and blistered mess.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka leaves a trail of red on the ice as he slides on his belly until he can get close enough to rest a hand in hers.</p><p> </p><p>He can hear voices, and feel the footsteps of people rushing towards them, but he can't keep his eyes open any longer.</p><p> </p><p>Their goddess is safe.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka is floating.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn't know where he is, but he feels safe, and soothed, and peaceful.</p><p> </p><p>His eyes blink open slowly, and he sees a familiar cave ceiling.</p><p> </p><p>Moving pours agony through his whole body, and he shouts through his gritted teeth, into the cavern. Several people surround him at once, Sokka recognizes them as healers from the temple.</p><p> </p><p>An elderly woman lays gentle hands on his shoulders. “Easy, <em>Amaratis</em>, you are badly hurt. Tui saved you both, but you cannot be taken from the pool quite yet.”</p><p> </p><p>Both?</p><p> </p><p>Sokka turns his head to the side, seeing Yue resting beside him in the water. She is not conscious, and a different person is working healing up and down her bare side. The burns look angry and excruciating, though some of the smaller ones have already healed, turning silver as they scar.</p><p> </p><p>His eyes slip closed once more, as his body fights him back down into slumber, away from the pain.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They heal together, slowly but surely.</p><p> </p><p>Weeks go by before they are allowed to move about the city unattended by a battalion of healers.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka has fought many warriors in his life, but <em>nurses</em> remain the most terrifying.</p><p> </p><p>He misses his sister, though she would be just as scary, and half as nice.</p><p> </p><p>The gossip running through the city keeps elevating himself and Yue to heroes, saviours of the moon spirit, and guardians of the North.</p><p> </p><p>Neither of them enjoy the extra attention, the constant awestruck eyes watching them as they mingle.</p><p> </p><p>One night they are simply sitting at the pool edge, both unshifted, when Yue voices a question. “Do you want to leave?”</p><p> </p><p>The, <em>because I can't</em>, goes unsaid, but Sokka hears it anyway.</p><p> </p><p>He does, and doesn't.</p><p> </p><p>His body itches to run, to escape himself for a day, a week, a year. But where would he go?</p><p> </p><p>There is no where now, that he can call home. Except...</p><p> </p><p>“No. Not yet.”</p><p> </p><p>She doesn't pry further, just leans into his side and rests her chin on his shoulder. He can feel the edge of the raised scar on her throat against his bare skin, as she wraps an arm around his back.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Years go by, and Sokka remains in the North.</p><p> </p><p>As ferocious of a beast as he is, there is comfort in the containment.</p><p> </p><p>He can't simply get up and leave, without serious arrangements, so it is easy to take the excuse to stay.</p><p> </p><p>Easier still, as more time slips by, to convince himself he is happy here.</p><p> </p><p>Yue knows of course, but she is fiercely protective of him, so she would never push him in any direction.</p><p> </p><p>He loves her to death.</p><p> </p><p>Like family.</p><p> </p><p>He still sends correspondence back and forth through some contacts, assisting where he can though things have been quiet for so long, there is little left for him to do.</p><p> </p><p>When a large red messenger hawk arrives at his window, his chest seizes for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>He would recognize that bird anywhere.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka hasn't spoken much to Iroh, since he had sent word of Zhao's failed incursion.</p><p> </p><p>He gently frees the letter from the bird's leg, taking a breath while he unfurls it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Dear Sokka,</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Have no fear, things have remained as they should, with no small thanks to you. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>As such, I am soon to retire from my place on the council, and I would like to formally offer the position to you.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I had hoped you would return before now, so we could discuss it in person, but this will have to do. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You do not have to say yes, but I would urge you to consider it, even if you only accept on a temporary basis. If nothing else you should get to see results of your handiwork, the difference is truly remarkable. Under the rule of my nephew, I can finally say that the Fire Nation is once again a place I am proud to call home. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I am forever grateful for your part in this as well.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>-Iroh</em>
</p><p> </p><p>There is a small doodle of a dragon at the bottom, that makes Sokka's mouth quirk, even as his heart races in his chest.</p><p> </p><p>He sits heavily on his bed, holding the letter loosely in his hand.</p><p> </p><p>Yue must have sensed his distress, because within moments there is a gentle rapping against his door frame. She slips into the room, locking the door behind her, and his wild, panicking eyes meet her calm ones.</p><p> </p><p>She smiles gently and sits beside him, slipping the note from his fingers. As she scans the letter, she lets her weight push into his side, and he appreciates the grounding effect it has on him.</p><p> </p><p>She stops after a moment, folding the letter neatly and putting it on the bed beside them. “Ah, so it is time then. For you to return.”</p><p> </p><p>His voice is as strained as his thoughts. “Is it?”</p><p> </p><p>She wraps her arms around his waist, chin hooking over his shoulder in their usual embrace. She says nothing for a moment, but sighs heavily through her nose. “I have been selfish long enough, and as much as I love you, it kills me a bit to see you turn this place into your prison.”</p><p> </p><p>He closes his eyes and rests his head against hers. “I do love it here, I <em>do</em>, but...”</p><p> </p><p>She nods, knowingly. “You also hate it.”</p><p> </p><p>He doesn't answer, but she is right. “I don't know what waits for me there. I've never asked about him, on purpose.” He could be married by now. To some noble from the Fire Nation more than likely. Which would be fine. It would be <em>fine</em>. Because all Sokka ever wanted was to make sure he would be okay. To make sure he would have a chance at happiness and peace.</p><p> </p><p>“I have never known you to be a coward, Sokka. Don't start now.” Slim fingers lightly trace the border of the scar on his chest. “Besides which, Iroh is right. At the very least you should get to see what you helped accomplish.”</p><p> </p><p>He stays silent, and they do not move for a while.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually, Yue extracts herself, and grabs a piece of parchment and a quill from his desk. “Come on, send your reply, before you talk yourself out of this."</p><p> </p><p>She sits with him as he writes, ever watchful. When his future is tied and sealed, and the hawk takes flight to return to his master, she stretches and nods towards the door. “Come to the pool with me tonight, it has been a while.”</p><p> </p><p>He does, but for the first time he does not find it restful. He watches the slow spin of Tui and La. The push and pull.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka wishes he had the space left to hope.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka knew he would be beautiful.</p><p> </p><p>Time and distance had grown them both into different people, but as he makes his way up the palace steps towards Zuko, his heart stops dead in his chest for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>He is regal, cut in the fire nation's finest to greet Sokka and his small group. But the posture and clothing is the least of what Sokka cares about. He could feel the tug in his chest increase with every step they had made from the docks, and being this close was near agony.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes glint like gold in the setting sun, and he flushes a pretty pink when he stumbles over his words for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka is so endeared by it, and instantly knows that Tui was right all along.</p><p> </p><p>He is so perfect, and Sokka stifles every urge his body has to reach out and touch him, because he knows that would be the end for him. He bows instead, needing to get himself under control.</p><p> </p><p>Suki gives him a knowing look from her post at Zuko's side, interrupting her charge's clumsy attempts at formality.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko isn't married. He isn't anything to anyone, apparently.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn't want... that's okay.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka would never cross boundaries. Would never hurt him.</p><p> </p><p>He thinks, <em>I will take as much, or as little of you as I can have, for as long as you let me have it.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Tu Lan is a rotten, bloated, fish of a person.</p><p> </p><p>Hearing the words he throws at Zuko makes Sokka see red, and he narrowly gets himself under control enough to stab cloth instead of flesh.</p><p> </p><p>The monster inside him rears its head, but is brought to heel when he sees the look in Zuko's eyes afterwards.</p><p> </p><p>The <em>acceptance</em>, of the insult.</p><p> </p><p>As if this happens a lot.</p><p> </p><p>As if this is something he tells himself.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka feels sick.</p><p> </p><p>If he can do nothing else while he is here, he will change that mind set or die trying.</p><p> </p><p>Because Zuko is beautiful, and Sokka would do anything to get him to see it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He slips up.</p><p> </p><p>Of course he does.</p><p> </p><p>It was ill advised at best, to let Zuko spar against him, but his curiosity had overridden his sense.</p><p> </p><p>Fingers slide over his wrist, and Sokka can't stop the way his pulse jumps, soul screaming, as the walls he has kept in place destabilize for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's gaze snaps to his as he feels it for a second before Sokka gets it reined back in.</p><p> </p><p>He ignores it, pretends it doesn't happen, and they continue on.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka got a glimpse of it, just for a moment, of all the pain, and fury, and grief, held tight behind gold eyes.</p><p> </p><p>He could help shoulder the weight of it, if only Zuko knew.</p><p> </p><p>But he is not that brave.</p><p> </p><p>Not yet.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Everything he learns about him, makes him love Zuko that much more.</p><p> </p><p>He is similar to Yue in many ways. His power comes from his kindness, and his love for his people. Iroh was right, of course. It does feel good to see what Zuko was able to become, in the absence of constant threat.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka could do without the workaholic tendencies though.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Izumi is something he hadn't expected.</p><p> </p><p>He quickly grows fond of her, and can't help the growing protectiveness as they become more familiar.</p><p> </p><p>She is <em>something</em>. Not like Sokka, not quite, but there is a familiarity he can't yet place.</p><p> </p><p>He hopes he can find a way to help her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko is a viper with blades.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka knew he would be.</p><p> </p><p>He loves him best like this, when he truly lets loose and runs on pure instinct. He keeps such rigid control of his emotions, but he is something <em>else</em>, unleashed.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka is so pleased to see the mask crack and fall away more and more, with every clash of swords.</p><p> </p><p>He won't hurt him, not really. Couldn't, even if he wanted to. It is a different part of this, a piece of the balance between them.</p><p> </p><p>There is something else there too, tonight. He can feel it in the heat of Zuko's gaze, in the way his own spirit is reaching out to him no matter how hard Sokka tries to stop it.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko does best him, knocking them both sprawling on the sand.</p><p> </p><p>He is every bit the beautiful, powerful man that has invaded Sokka's dreams for years, seated straddled across his thighs with shock flitting across his face.</p><p> </p><p>Fingers dig into his chest like they want to claw his heart out of him.</p><p> </p><p>He would probably let them.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>If I'm reading this all wrong-”</em></p><p> </p><p>No.</p><p> </p><p><em>Never</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's lips are velvet against his own.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>This was a mistake.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe.</p><p> </p><p>Because now he doesn't think he could live without this.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka knows the taste of his kiss, the feel of his skin in his teeth, of his body pressed against him, and their heartbeats thrumming in time.</p><p> </p><p>He knows that leaving this behind would destroy him.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He has to tell him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He has to tell him.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He is so consumed by dread it feels like its eating him alive.</p><p> </p><p>But he has a plan.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They are here, and Zuko is carefully watching him, pale skin glowing bright from the radiant moonlight streaming down from above.</p><p> </p><p>He is so beautiful.</p><p> </p><p>“Why are you afraid?”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Because I am so much more than what you've seen, and I'm terrified it will be too much.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Because you are the other half of me, and I have hid it from you, all this time.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>And.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Because I love you, and my ribs want to break with the force it takes to keep the words back. </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko opened his eyes.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*</p><p>Sokka: Will see a hurt boy in the dark and ask "Is anyone going to devote their whole life to loving and watching over this person without them ever knowing?" And then not wait for an answer. </p><p>Thank you to all my commenters and kudosers! &lt;3</p><p>As this section is so large, feel free to point out any spelling/grammar stuff. I have no beta, and I have gone kind of mistake-blind after reading through it so many times.</p><p>Sokka's playlist has Runaway by Aurora, and Run Boy Run by Woodkid for this chapter. :P</p><p>*</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Of Burdens and Beasts</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*</p><p>~Will Smith gesturing meme~ </p><p>I present you... this!</p><p>                                                                                         *</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Coming back to himself was like plunging into a glacial lake.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gasped in a sharp breath, pain racing along his ribs from where he must have held his air. He didn't truly know how much time had passed, but it seemed like only moments took place while he endured the lifetime of memories.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka hadn't moved, Zuko could still feel the heat of him seeping through his clothes, as well as where Sokka still had his nose tucked into his temple.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was distantly aware that he was shaking. Aftershocks racked his body as it tried to deal with the wildly fluctuating emotions. He could barely think, could barely <em>see</em>, just enough to meet worried gray-blue eyes.</p><p> </p><p>He wanted to say something, <em>anything</em>, but-</p><p> </p><p>There was so much.</p><p> </p><p>It was nearly overwhelming him, and tension began to pinch at his temples as he struggled to keep himself together. All of the pain and heartbreak that he had experienced through Sokka's eyes felt like it was trying to drown him, and his voice broke when he finally managed to speak through his gasping breaths. “<em>Sokka.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>He knew he was close to hyperventilating, and even as he thought it, he could feel Sokka retreating, starting to pull away from his hurricane of a mind, and shifting to take a step back from him.</p><p> </p><p>Both of Zuko's hands shot up to grab Sokka's shirt, hauling him back to him with enough force to rip the seam. “<em>Don't</em>. Don't you dare.” His voice was raw and hoarse, and he was vaguely aware of twin hot streaks tracking down his cheeks.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stopped instantly, not resisting the pull. He slid his hands up to carefully cradle Zuko's face, sweeping his thumbs through the dampness on his skin.</p><p> </p><p>The gentle touch grounded him, and Zuko's breath caught and shuddered out a bit more evenly. He closed his eyes tightly as hot tears continued to escape, and he was horrified to realize that his control was in pieces. All of the rigid discipline that had been bred and enforced into him had been torn out, leaving him raw, and open, and <em>vicious</em>.</p><p> </p><p>He was furious.</p><p> </p><p>Not <em>at</em> Sokka, not really. At circumstance. At once again being protected unknowingly, simply for being someone in power.</p><p> </p><p>He struggled to get his breathing under control, as rage and desperation warred in his head. He felt fire trying to call itself to him, responding to his distress, and suddenly smelled the smoldering fabric from where his hands were clenched in Sokka's shirt.</p><p> </p><p>He thought, <em>I have to calm down, or I am going to burn us both to ash.</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka pushed forward against him, pressing his lips to Zuko's forehead before quietly murmuring, “Well. If I had to pick a way to go.”</p><p> </p><p>Because of course, Sokka could hear what he was thinking. He was <em>everywhere</em> right now. In his head, under his skin, singing through the blood coursing through Zuko's veins. He was the only sliver of stability in the whirlwind of Zuko's mind.</p><p> </p><p>“Don't even joke about that, Sokka, please, I...” Zuko swallowed hard, heart pounding.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay.” Sokka's tone held no humor, and it was such an alien thing to hear. His arms wrapped around Zuko entirely, and he wanted to sag into the strong hold but his erratic thoughts kept him taught as a bowstring.</p><p> </p><p>He could feel Sokka take a deep breath under his hands, but he did not say anything further.</p><p> </p><p>He was waiting, Zuko realized, for an answer. For a yes or no, to everything.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's anger abruptly reached a boiling point, because he knew now, what was in Sokka's bag, he saw it, just before the end of his memories.</p><p> </p><p>Provisions. Enough for a few days. Sokka's favourite weapons, a change of clothes, some various items of sentimental value. That <em>ridiculous</em> figurine of Avatar Aang.</p><p> </p><p>An escape.</p><p> </p><p>Just in case he-</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's fingers were white-knuckled in Sokka's shirt as he snarled. “You aren't going <em>anywhere</em>.” His body finally obeyed him, releasing the cloth to seize his face and haul him into a bruising kiss.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka fell into it willingly, relaxing into him as his shoulders softened in relief. He was a calm, quiet thing in Zuko's mind, and it made him feel even more untamed. He bit, and licked, and <em>tore</em> his way into Sokka's mouth, unable to get a handle on his ragged nerves.</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't a battle, it was a <em>claiming</em>, because Sokka was not resisting him at all. The warrior tightened his hold around Zuko's back, bringing them even closer, but he didn't make any effort to stop him, just allowed Zuko to take, and take, and <em>take</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Anything he wanted.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's teeth slid sharp and snagging against Sokka's bottom lip, and he couldn't stop himself from shoving him backwards, away from the clearing until his back hit a tree just at the edge. A bright, coppery, taste hit his tongue, and he knew he had dug in a bit too hard, but he had lost any grip he had on restraint.</p><p> </p><p>Even this didn't seem to faze Sokka, who just rumbled appreciatively into the kiss as Zuko's hands gripped tight in his hair to tilt him for a better angle. Zuko felt hands slide beneath his cloak, not restricting, just pressing warmth and comfort into the bare skin of his back.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka slowly gentled him back down and Zuko's desperation began to burn out with the knowledge that Sokka wouldn't push back. Not against him, not like this. <em>Never</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Because Sokka <em>loved</em> him.</p><p> </p><p>Now that he knew what it was, it was impossible not to feel it, wrapped around his body and mind entirely and seeping into his bones. It felt like sunlight on his skin. Zuko could feel Sokka carefully sort through the tangle of his frenzied mind, easing him back from the edge.</p><p> </p><p>He broke off, panting for breath and opened his eyes to meet the stormy gaze. Sokka said nothing, but pulled him flush against him, loosing a breath and resting his forehead against Zuko's.</p><p> </p><p>They were so close, even in the dark he could see all the different colours in the warrior's eyes, like a maelstrom in the sea. They did glow, just slightly, a different proof that Sokka was an otherworldly thing, strange and beautiful in equal measure.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko loved him.</p><p> </p><p>The knowledge came to him as easy as breathing, and even as he thought it, he watched the warrior's eyes widen in realization, as the feeling flowed into him. Sokka broke into a soft smile, and filled with a warmth Zuko could feel all the way to his bones. Lips caught his temple, both of his eyes, the bridge of his nose, and Zuko couldn't help but flush with pleasure at the attention.</p><p> </p><p>Regardless of what he knew now, about what Sokka truly was, did nothing to change the way he felt.</p><p> </p><p>Because Sokka was <em>his</em>.</p><p> </p><p>This beautiful, wonderful, self-sacrificing <em>idiot</em> of a man, belonged to Zuko. He always had.</p><p> </p><p>All of the fight and fire abruptly fled Zuko, leaving only the painful clawing of grief in it's wake. Because this was just another thing he had lost. Due to his lineage, due to his role as Firelord, and duty to his people.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka caught his lips this time, a quick gentle press. “I'm right here Zuko. You didn't lose me.”<br/><br/></p><p>But he <em>could have</em>. He could have lost him a thousand times over, on any one of the countless missions in the dark. He would have never known, about any of this. Zuko thought of all the silvery scars that mapped Sokka's skin like constellations. He remembered Sokka's scrawled note to him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Marks of bravery.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>An understatement. Sokka's courage was forefront for his entire life, and especially now, in this moment. Soul laid bare in front of Zuko.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko took a deep breath, attempting to steady himself. He gently extricated himself from Sokka's arms, and the warrior let him go without resistance as he took a step backwards.</p><p> </p><p>“Will you show me?” Zuko wanted to see it. He wanted to burn away any lingering doubt in Sokka's head. Because he was never going to let any part of this man go.</p><p> </p><p>The warrior appraised him carefully, as he felt Zuko's curiosity. “Are you sure? It's... a lot.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko nodded, delicately lacing his own hands together in front of him. “I couldn't see, like that, from your perspective. I saw the others, but I don't actually know what <em>you</em> look like.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled and tilted his head to the side. “Fair.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko followed him as he walked a little distance from the treeline, into the light of the glade, and methodically started to pull his clothing off.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko tried very hard to keep his mind on task, but it was proving difficult to be respectful as more and more skin was revealed. He could practically hear Sokka laughing in response in his head, as the warrior turned to face him fully, naked skin soaking in the moonlight from above.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sent him an amused look as he felt Zuko's thoughts turn decidedly less than decent. “Are you absolutely sure, that you want to do this, right <em>now</em>? Because I feel like you would rather be doing something else.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko huffed a laugh, glad to have his emotions mostly back under control. “I am capable of restraint.” He tried to ignore the flush crawling up his neck. “Later.”</p><p> </p><p>The warrior flashed him a smile, and winked.</p><p> </p><p>It was near instantaneous, a trick of the light almost. A tearing sound, like quiet lightning, was the only real warning. Zuko's eyes couldn't really find the exact moment the shift took place, but one second Sokka was standing before him, and the next, he was something else.</p><p> </p><p>To call him a wolf would fall short by leagues.</p><p> </p><p>He was wolf <em>shaped</em>, but that was where the resemblance ended. This close, the difference was stark. Sokka was a massive thing, monstrous in both size, and otherness. Adorned in night black fur, so dark it seemed to pull in the light from around them, and his eyes, though the same colour, were much larger, swirling storm gray that glowed like starlight against the darkness.</p><p> </p><p>It was easy to see how Sokka was so much <em>more</em>. The way his skin shifted as he moved as if even it had a difficult time containing him, and how his wolf grin showed off far too many teeth.</p><p> </p><p><em>This</em> was a protector of Tui. A guardian of the night sky, of the moon and stars.</p><p> </p><p>He was terrifying.</p><p> </p><p>He was the most beautiful thing Zuko had ever seen.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko took a step forward, sinking his hands into the velvet fur around Sokka's neck.</p><p> </p><p>“You're amazing.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka chuffed in amusement and pushed his huge head into Zuko's chest, forcing him to rock onto his heels to catch the weight of him.</p><p> </p><p>Words came, silent in the air, but warm and playful in Zuko's mind.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>So, will you hunt with me?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko broke into an incredulous smile, barely believing that this wasn't some insane fever dream.</p><p> </p><p>But even so...</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Yes</em>.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Sokka was alive.</p><p> </p><p>He thought he had known what that meant, before this, but he hadn't. Not really.</p><p> </p><p>He tore through the forest, muscles burning and lungs aching as his ribs expanded wider and wider with every breath. He had no idea how long he had been running for, had lost all sense of time and space as he raced up the mountainside.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka had always been so careful, when he had done this before, always made sure he had family or trusted friends close at hand to help bring him back to himself. It had felt a little unnerving, to lose all control and feel the pull of the moon through every inch of him. As if she could pull a little too hard and he would lose himself completely.</p><p> </p><p>It had never been like <em>this</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Having Zuko atop his back, legs tight on his sides, kept him more grounded than he had ever believed possible.</p><p> </p><p>Having Zuko in his <em>mind</em>, brought him a peace he had never known. All parts of them coexisted, and balanced. It was like being pulled out of a fog, into the light of day.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko loved him. He loved him. He <em>loved</em> him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka could feel their heartbeats rising together to beat in unison, and he couldn't stop himself from slowing to a stop to howl his happiness into the night sky.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed, as open and joyful as Sokka had ever seen him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You are going to scare off any game. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He had been quick to pick up on how to speak like this. To use the connection between them to articulate words as well as intent. It was a redundant statement, Zuko knew well enough that Sokka only enjoyed the chase, but he answered anyways.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I have already caught the one I want. That is enough of a hunt for me. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka craned his head to the side and gently caught Zuko's pant leg in his teeth, earning him a huff of laughter.</p><p> </p><p>He could practically feel the rolling eyes happening above him, but that didn't stop him from basking in Zuko's contentment, as it burrowed low into his stomach like warm embers. Fingers slid up between his ears, as Zuko leaned forward, speaking out loud this time.</p><p> </p><p>“Take me back then, <em>hunter</em>, and claim your prize.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't suppress the full body shiver at the tone, and cocked his head to the side in amusement.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Is the great Firelord Zuko suggesting a quickie in the woods? Be still my heart.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He could feel Zuko sit back up with a laugh. “More of a demand, if I'm being honest.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka rumbled happily in response.</p><p> </p><p><em>Anything you wish</em>.</p><p> </p><p>He took off once more, back towards the glade.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It didn't take him long to find his way back, and as he stepped into the open space of the mountain pool once more, he slowed to a stop and allowed Zuko to slide from his back. He instantly missed the physical touch, as Zuko stepped slightly away from him to give him space.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't help but let his eyes wander down his lover's body for a moment. Zuko was windswept and red flushed, golden eyes shining in the dark as he watched Sokka. His mane of hair was loose around his shoulders, thoroughly messed from their activity.</p><p> </p><p>He could feel Zuko getting slightly flustered at the obvious appraisal, and it would've been easy to poke fun at him a bit, but Sokka was not in that kind of mood tonight.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You're beautiful. You always have been.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's eyes softened a bit as he smiled, still a bit embarrassed, but the better kind. He knew for certain, now, that Sokka was being honest. That every time he had said something like this in the past, he had truly <em>meant</em> it.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka snapped back to himself, as easy as breathing, and the moment he regained two legs, took two strides forward and kissed Zuko properly. The other man melted into him, making a needy sound against his mouth as his hands cupped Sokka's face for a moment before one slipped down to rest a palm against his heart.</p><p> </p><p>Just like the first time they had done this, Zuko dug his fingers in, hard enough to bite. Sokka gasped into the kiss, and couldn't help the way he pushed into the contact with a whine. He opened his eyes to meet Zuko's gold gaze, nearly eclipsed by his dark pupils. He could feel every part of them together, heart beats rising together once more, souls weaving together like a tapestry.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was a wild thing in his head. Sokka could feel all of the untamed parts of him reaching out to wrap around pieces of himself, finding a home. There was also a slowly building desperation in them both and he broke off, trailing his lips down Zuko's throat, stopping where the pulse was the strongest to suck a mark into the pale skin.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's other hand slid into Sokka's hair as he tossed his head back and moaned at the feeling. His hips shoved forward, seemingly on their own, and Sokka made an appreciative noise as Zuko's still clothed body met his very naked one, grinding up against him with delicious contact. He blindly groped for the fasteners of Zuko's shirt, and met moderate success, enough to expose the pale chest to the night air. He followed the path downward and dug his teeth into the notch of Zuko's collar bone, earning a hiss as the other man reached down to undo the rest of his shirt and shrugged out of it.</p><p> </p><p>One slender hand hooked his jaw and Sokka obediently came back up to meet Zuko's gaze. The other man was breathing hard, impressively dishevelled, with one hand still refusing to budge from it's home on his chest. Zuko's eyes were blown, and his thumb trailed along Sokka's bottom lip as he spoke.</p><p> </p><p>“You're mine, yes?” His voice was hoarse, thick with emotion that Sokka could both feel, and hear.</p><p> </p><p>He brought his hands up to cradle Zuko's face, ghosting a kiss to his forehead before leaning back to nod with a smile. “Always.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko chased him back, snagging his lips once, twice, before continuing. “And you love me?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't help the rumble of contentment that came from his chest, nor the way the words nearly snarled out of him. “<em>Of course I do</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled against his lips, eyes glinting just a bit dangerously. “Then <em>prove</em> it.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka growled and surged forward, crushing his mouth to Zuko's desperately. The other man gave as good as he got, nipping at Sokka's questing tongue, and sucking hard on his bottom lip. Sokka let his hands trail down Zuko's bare sides to slip past his waist band and grab hold of his hips, pulling them flush together. He could feel how hard they both were, and the hot spikes of pleasure in his head made his breath gasp out of him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka felt the mischief a second too late, as an ankle snaked behind his knee, and Zuko used his weight to shove him backwards, sending him onto his ass in the dirt.</p><p> </p><p>He opened his mouth to complain, but bit it back as he watched Zuko practically rip the remaining clothes off his body, leaving them in a heap at his side. He grabbed something from the pocket of his discarded cloak before turning back to Sokka, who wasted no time in leaning up to haul Zuko down on top of him.</p><p> </p><p>The firebender laughed as he was pulled to straddle Sokka's waist, a reminder of their very first time together. He pressed something into Sokka's hand, and when he looked he realized that it was one of the small oil vials they kept at their bedsides.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka quirked a brow. “Is this how you thought tonight would go?”</p><p> </p><p>He couldn't stop a groan as Zuko leaned back to rock their hips together in a slow grind. “Not in the least, but I have learned to be prepared after that incident we had in the barracks.” He ran a hot hand up Sokka's side to his chest, sliding his thumb over the nipple and causing Sokka's back to arch beneath him at the feel. “Turns out my foresight was well warranted.” He smirked down at him, but Sokka could feel the desperation leeching out into him from Zuko.</p><p> </p><p>He sat up, pushing Zuko back onto his thighs slightly as he swept the dark hair out of his face to kiss him again. Zuko pushed into it hard once more, but Sokka gentled him, slowing him down until it was nearly languid. He let his hands rest on Zuko's thighs, rubbing soft circles into the cut of his hip. "I'm not going anywhere Zuko, we have all night."</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed into his mouth. "Can't help but feel like I need to make up for lost time." He nipped at Sokka's bottom lip, before sweeping his tongue along it to soothe the sting. "I'm also feeling a bit... unmoored."</p><p> </p><p>He was. Sokka could feel that as well in both of them. His own need for Zuko burned through every inch of him, but he refused to rush this.</p><p> </p><p>He uncorked the vial in his hand, and warmed a bit of the oil between his fingers. He pulled back from the kiss for a moment to watch Zuko's expression as he reached below to carefully slip a finger inside.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko arched into him with a moan, rocking forwards, which only served to grind their cocks together once more. A rosy flush started to spread across the pale chest, and Sokka couldn't help but chase after it with his tongue. Zuko's hands gripped the back of his neck as he scraped his teeth over a pert nipple. “<em>Fuck</em>, <em>another</em>. Sokka give me another.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka could feel the scorching heat of Zuko's need in his thoughts, and gave in to him easily, sliding another finger along the first into the silky heat. He slowly drew them both out to the tips, before pushing back in and curling them slightly, finding the spot that made Zuko hips stutter as his thighs tightened around Sokka's waist. It wasn't long before he added a third as well, enjoying the primal sound that tore from Zuko's throat that warned him he was getting close.</p><p> </p><p>He was such a beautiful thing, especially like this, when all the regal composure fled him and left a needy, desperate, mess in Sokka's arms. He had spent the last week learning every possible inch of him that he could. The feel of his skin, and muscle, and bones against him. He wanted the memory of it to cut into him and scar, so he could never forget this.</p><p> </p><p>Just in case.</p><p> </p><p>Because Sokka had never dared to hope that he could have this. Not in it's totality. He and Zuko were quite similar in that respect, as he could never envision a scenario in which this conversation went well. And he had already seen the aftermath of what happened when it <em>didn't</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sucked in a sharp breath as his chest ached, shutting his eyes against the swell of emotion as he felt tears begin to form. He could feel Zuko's concern in his head, as he picked apart the reason. The grip he had on the back of Sokka's neck tightened, not enough to hurt, but to hold, as he pulled Sokka back up to his level.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey, look at me.” Sokka cracked his eyes open, biting into his own lip as he tried to get a handle on himself. A hand swept the hair away from his damp forehead, and lips pressed softly into his cheek just below his eye. “<em>Sokka</em>.” He lifted his gaze to look up at his lover, who was giving him an exasperated expression.</p><p> </p><p>“Later, we are going to have a discussion about your self imposed 'worthlessness', but for now,” Zuko pulled him forward to kiss him firmly, meeting his eyes with intent, “I love you. <em>Every part</em> of you. So don't think for one second that I don't want to keep this.” His gaze sharpened slightly. “That being said, if you don't <em>hurry up and fuck me I might actually kill you.</em>” He punctuated his words with a slow roll of his hips, half thrusting against Sokka's fingers.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka couldn't stifle the huff of laughter, and buried his face in the side of Zuko's neck to take a couple steadying breaths. He didn't respond, but he pressed a lingering kiss to Zuko's throat as he removed his fingers and added more oil to his hand before running a quick hand over himself. That alone was almost too much, and he knew this was going to be quick, but Zuko didn't seem to be faring much better from where he was panting in Sokka's lap. He tapped Zuko's hip. “Like this, or?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko growled something unintelligible, reaching between them to take Sokka's cock in his hand before bracing himself up on his knees and lining him up.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka fingers tightened their grip on Zuko's thighs as he slowly sank down on him. Tight, silky heat enveloped him, and it took every bit of restraint he had to remain completely still, allowing Zuko to take him in at his own pace.</p><p> </p><p>It was different, with the link open between them. Sokka could feel himself in the moment, but he could also feel the distant sensation of being fucked as well, as both of their pleasure and need blended together. It was a lot, and he breathed hot and heavy against Zuko's neck as the other man shivered in his arms.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Spirits,</em> Sokka, I can feel-,” Zuko rose slightly, hissing at the stretch before sinking back down even further. “<em>Fuck</em>.” He let out a shaky breath, and Sokka leaned up to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. Zuko turned to meet him, letting his arms rest over Sokka's shoulders, keeping him caged in.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka wrapped his own arms around Zuko's pale hips, helping him balance. The feeling was too overwhelming to do much more than rock together, but that was more than enough. They were pressed against one another in every possible way, and Zuko's moans were getting high and breathless as his cock rubbed between the heat of the their stomachs.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka could feel Zuko getting close, and he wasn't far behind. He tilted his head up to catch Zuko's lips properly, kissing him as tenderly as he could manage, because this... this time mattered. Far more than any of the others. Zuko met him, beat for beat, opening for him easily to let Sokka take whatever he needed.</p><p> </p><p>And that was enough. He felt all the muscles in Zuko's body snap tight as a bowstring as he came, moaning heat into the kiss. Sokka lasted all of three seconds afterwards, having the electric feel of Zuko's orgasm flood his own thoughts as he spilled inside the other man.</p><p> </p><p>His chest heaved as he tried to gain his breath back afterwards, feeling the aftershocks send sparks through both of them.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko kissed him again, just a quick, gentle press, humour catching the corners of his eyes. “I mean, far be it from me to say, but we seem to be getting better at this every day.” He glanced down at the state of their bodies. “Though it seems we are also getting messier.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed, nosing him gently. “Fucking on the forest floor does come with some some added dirt and debris.” He helped Zuko carefully extricate himself, before standing and pulling the deer-legged man up with him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko wrapped an arm around his waist with a smirk. “Next time we will bring a blanket.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka rested his head on Zuko's, taking in the familiar scent of cinnamon that always lingered on the man.</p><p> </p><p>“Sounds perfect.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Cleaning up was a task.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko gave up on his hair entirely and simply tied it back until he could tackle it at home.</p><p> </p><p>They washed themselves quickly in the cold mountain pool, and went about finding their clothing around the clearing to redress themselves.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka once more slipped a hand into his to pull him into the darkened mountain path, but Zuko held tight and didn't budge for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>He paused for a moment, not quite knowing how to express this, but Sokka waited patiently for him to gather his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>“I don't like to admit it, but you were probably right, not to stay after Uncle found you.” It pained him a bit, to think of how his life might have been different but... “I wasn't okay. Not for a long time. I struggled for years to come to grips with what happened to me. And I owe everything to my family, to Iroh, and Lu Ten most, for pulling me back from the brink, more than a few times.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka already knew this, because it hadn't been a one way street. He had seen just as much into Zuko's memories as Zuko had into his, but he needed to say this out loud. He needed to get this point across. “I could have been much different than I am. Azula and I both, could have been lost to our father's madness, but everyone around us refused to let us.” Sokka tightened his grip on Zuko's hand, and Zuko squeezed back in response. “I would like to think it would have been different. <em>Easier</em>, maybe, with you by my side, but I know I would have hurt you somewhere along the line, so I can't help but be grateful that it happened this way instead.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko reached a hand out to rest on Sokka's cheek. “That, in no way, means that I ever would have thought you weren't <em>worthy of being with me</em>. I have only ever cared about how people treat myself and my family, not their <em>station</em> in life.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka nodded, flushing slightly and looking down. Zuko let his thumb run underneath a storm coloured eye, before bringing their entwined hands up to press a kiss to the back of Sokka's.</p><p> </p><p>“Take us home.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In the light of day, Calianna made her way up an old mountain path.</p><p> </p><p>She had heard it, in the night, the chorus of howls shaking through the trees, and she knew.</p><p> </p><p>She knew.</p><p> </p><p>She <em>knew</em>.</p><p> </p><p>It <em>was</em> him. Here, in her homeland that she no longer had any claim to.</p><p> </p><p>She had been on the run for so long, and even now she could feel her end closing fast on her.</p><p> </p><p>She was hunted, still, but she was so tired, so maybe, this would be best.</p><p> </p><p>She could have come here in the night. Could have tried to take him down then and there, but that wasn't fair. It wasn't an even exchange.</p><p> </p><p>Because that <em>beast</em> hadn't just taken her older brother's life, he had taken hers as well, in every way except her death.</p><p> </p><p>She looked down, finding a paw print in the dirt, easily three times the size of her own foot.</p><p> </p><p>A small smile quirked the corner of her mouth.</p><p> </p><p>She had an idea.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*</p><p>Incredibly, I seem to have a hard time writing smut without an insane amount of FEEEEEEELINGS. </p><p>Also, this was my soundtrack for writing this chapter. Before the Storm - Colm McGuinness       watch?v=6m1vEhd_uk0  if you want to listen.</p><p>Thank you everyone for your incredible support on this fic! 😘😘😘</p><p>                                                                                          *</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Of Preparation and Precipice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*</p><p>Woof, I have had to do some SERIOUS editing, because this chapter had to get split into a couple, or it would be 20 pages long. </p><p>Sorry for the lateness, work has been nothing but emergencies and 90 hr weeks are kilLiNg me. </p><p>Enjoy!</p><p>                                                                                                          *</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They had managed a few hours of sleep after making it back home, but dawn came before either of them were ready for it.</p><p> </p><p>While they had no official business today, the palace was a hive of activity as servants and guards took supplies out into the grounds for the upcoming feast the following night. Zuko loved to watch the transformation, blues and reds and golds decorating every bit of sprawling open space, as tables were strategically placed and a dance floor was set up.</p><p> </p><p>He and Sokka assisted as much as they could, but by mid afternoon the physical and emotional exhaustion had caught up to them. The pair had half collapsed on a sofa in the great hall, and were nearly asleep when Suki stumbled across them.</p><p> </p><p>“Ah yes, this is certainly helpful.” Zuko cracked an eye open to meet the judging gaze of his sentinel, who raised a brow at the two of them.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grumbled something unintelligible, and Zuko could feel the slight annoyance coming from the other man at being pulled from his doze. “Sorry Suki, we were out late, kind of running out of steam here.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki rolled her eyes. “Evidently. You two are a sight.” She put her hands on her hips in a very matronly gesture that seemed at odds with her stern expression. “Why don't you head back to your rooms. Izumi and I can handle overseeing the rest of this, and you aren't providing much assistance like <em>this</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka stretched, groaning in relief. “You are probably right.”</p><p> </p><p>“I usually am.” She smirked. “<em>Also,</em> Zuko, you have a leaf in your hair.” She grinned at him knowingly, and Zuko couldn't stop the rush of heat to his cheeks.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka snorted beside him, and he blindly reached over to smack the warrior in the chest. “Don't you dare laugh, it was entirely your fault.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki mimed gagging. “Go. Get out of here and spare me any details.” She turned on her heel to leave, but stopped for a moment and glanced at Zuko over her shoulder. “You know, then?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.” Zuko nodded with a yawn.</p><p> </p><p>She watched him for a moment, her gaze faraway, before she nodded as well. “Good.” With that, she left them in relative silence, with just the slowly fading sound of her footsteps on the stone floor.</p><p> </p><p>After a moment, Sokka heaved himself up with a groan, offering his hand to Zuko, who took it gratefully and allowed himself to be pulled to his feet. “I would like nothing more than to cook myself in your bath for a while, but I think the chances of falling asleep and drowning are far too high.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled as the words were murmured into his temple. “We can do that in the morning, but I'm planning on passing out the second my face finds a pillow.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned. “Deal.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He didn't go to bed straight away, instead electing to at least comb his hair out first. It was certainly a mess, and Zuko was cursing himself in hindsight for not tying it back before they left on their night time adventure as he methodically pulled small twigs and leaves out of the tangles.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was dozing lightly on the bed, splayed out on his belly while he waited for Zuko to join him. He could feel that he was still awake, but the edges of his thoughts were getting blurred and fuzzy as he fought to keep conscious.</p><p> </p><p>When Zuko finally finished- and this time did indeed weave his hair into a braid to keep it neat for the night- he strode over and sat on the mattress beside Sokka, who roused slightly as he was jostled. Smiling, he slid his fingers up Sokka's back, letting his nails run lightly over the notches of his spine, and enjoying the gooseflesh that chased the touch.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka groaned appreciatively and reached a hand out to rest on Zuko's thigh. “You better stop that unless you want to go another round.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko could feel the want warring with exhaustion, and chuckled, scratching his nails lightly in the hair at the back of Sokka's neck. “You say that as if you wouldn't fall asleep half way through.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka turned his head to smile up at him. “Normally I love a challenge, but I think you might be right this time.” He hooked an arm around Zuko's waist to pull him down onto the bed properly, and he went without resistance, shifting around until they settled comfortably against one another.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was broader than Zuko, but he always seemed to like this position best, where he could tuck himself into Zuko's side and let his head rest on his chest. Zuko didn't mind, as he reached down to pull a blanket over both of them, and continued to let his fingers roam freely over the bare skin of Sokka's back.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was reminded of something, in this instance.</p><p> </p><p>He himself had numerous small scratches and red marks on his legs from their tryst in the woods, but Sokka's back once again showed no evidence of the rough encounter. Now he knew the reason why, and he couldn't help but warm at the shared memory of Sokka carefully healing some of his back in the bath that one day.</p><p> </p><p>His brain halted as he realized something. “Sokka.”</p><p> </p><p>The warrior shifted slightly, speaking mostly into Zuko's chest. “Hmm?”</p><p> </p><p>“You can... heal people, yes?”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka tightened his hold on Zuko's waist, and tangled a leg between his. “Mhm, to a degree, yes. I can't heal everything, but small stuff isn't too hard.” His voice was low, and sleep slurred, and Zuko could tell he was a hairsbreadth away from passing out, but...</p><p> </p><p>He cleared his throat pointedly. “Then why, and please spare no detail, have I been walking around looking like I sleep wearing a collar made of <em>leeches</em>, for <em>weeks</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes popped open, and he opened his mouth to reply, but Zuko wasn't done. “I can understand that you were trying to hide what you are, but you could have easily gotten rid of most of them without me noticing! I never even look at a mirror till the morning Sokka!”</p><p> </p><p>He couldn't help but feel vindicated as Sokka flushed crimson, and Zuko could feel him trying to squash the reason away in his head before Zuko could get a glimpse, but he was too slow to stop the emotion attached.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised an eyebrow and started to chuckle. “Are you serious.” His fingers tightened on Sokka's neck.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka groaned in defeat and buried his face more firmly into Zuko's skin.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Are you serious</em>?! I'm pretty sure I have moved past the point in my life where there are potential suitors banging on the palace doors, so I'm not sure where this need to <em>mark your territory</em> is coming from.” He couldn't seem to stop <em>laughing</em>, this was the not even close to the most ridiculous thing to happen in the last twenty four hours, but Zuko was near tears as he tried to hold in his snickering. It was not helped by the heat of embarrassment coming from his lover.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka propped himself up on his elbow and mock glared down at Zuko, which only served to make it <em>worse</em>. The warrior sighed and smiled in spite of himself. “Will you stop laughing at me? I couldn't help it!” He punctuated his statement by letting his head drop and digging his teeth into a softer part of Zuko's stomach, speaking around his prize. “Even if no one saw them, I knew they were there, and it helped keep me a bit more grounded when we were around people.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko managed to staunch his laughter, but still grinned as he reached down to hold Sokka's jaw with one hand. “I'm already <em>yours</em>, you <em>oaf</em>. If anything it should be <em>me</em> who gets to be possessive, there has been no shortage of interest in you since 'the handsome Ambassador from the South' arrived here. I already have a difficult time being cordial to many of the supply traders when they spend entire meetings oogling you from across the room. And I don't even have the ability to mark you up the same way, since they all just disappear!” He sighed in half disappointment as Sokka rested his head back against him.</p><p> </p><p>The warrior quirked an eyebrow and slid a hand around Zuko's side, fitting fingers between his ribs. “Well. I could make out with you at the feast tomorrow, that would probably get the point across.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko shook his head, though the idea had some merit. “Absolutely not. I am not adding more fuel to the fire of my council. I don't even want to <em>know</em> what bets they have placed on this event.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed. “They are certainly... interesting. Not at all what I expected a team of advisors for the Firelord to be like, but I'm glad. They are good people.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko yawned and leaned back more fully as sleep started to call to him once more. “Yes, they are. Their help and loyalty has meant everything to me, I owe them a lot.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka settled against him once more, finding a comfortable position and closing his eyes. “They owe you just as much, don't forget.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt the insistence, and knew there was no point in arguing so he just sighed and let his fingers return to Sokka's back, stroking nonsense patterns into the smooth skin until he drifted off.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In the darkened night passages of the palace, a young princess made her way up to an old watch tower.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi was barefoot, and the stone was cold against her feet, but it helped to ground her, remind her that this was real, that she was here in this moment.</p><p> </p><p>She came to the bottom of the final ladder, and hoisted herself up the old, creaking wood. When she arrived at the top, she sat down in the cramped space, and gazed out at the moonlit city.</p><p> </p><p>She had always loved this spot. Her father used to bring her here for a break when royal politics and posturing got to be too much for her younger self. He would bring tea and an old pai sho set, and allow the quiet of the space to seep into her until she could calm herself down.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi sometimes thought if she sat perfectly still and closed her eyes, she could still feel his presence in the small space, still hear his laugh, echoing down from the tower.</p><p> </p><p>She wondered what advice he would have for her, in this instance.</p><p> </p><p>She looked out into the winter black sky, at the full moon hanging heavy with the vaguest tint of blue, and her heart felt heavy as lead.</p><p> </p><p>They were happy. They were finally moving on, past the trauma and loss, starting to live again, and now this.</p><p> </p><p>She had become so complacent, had ignored it for too long, and now she was out of time once more.</p><p> </p><p>She wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all, but she kept her mouth closed as the wind picked up and blew her hair back from her face.</p><p> </p><p>She thought, <em>I wonder if our family is cursed. If we will always lose what we love.</em></p><p> </p><p>But what could she do. What could she possibly do to stop this, when she never could before.</p><p> </p><p>She wrapped her arms around her knees, quietly resigning herself, and thought, <em>I will be happy. I will be brave. Until I can't be.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They slept well into the next day, feeling lazy and indulgent. Zuko woke first as the sun warmed his skin, and blearily blinked down at Sokka's still form. They hadn't shifted much, exhaustion forcing them to sleep heavy as stones. Sokka was slightly lower than he had been, wrapped loosely around Zuko's stomach with his head resting in the crook of his elbow.</p><p> </p><p>He didn't think he had ever been this content. The quiet comfort of Sokka against him, and the gentle pulse of the bond between them had him reluctant to wake any further, but they had a feast to prepare for. Zuko gently pushed backwards and slid out from beneath the warrior to stand, smiling as Sokka grumbled something and blindly patted a hand along the mattress in search of him.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko squeezed his hand, but left him to doze as he entered the adjoining chamber to take a quick bath. The amount of grime that came off of him left him with dubious thoughts about his sheets, but they could always sleep in Sokka's tonight if he didn't have time to send them to be washed.</p><p> </p><p>Once he was clean and had found a fresh robe to throw on he returned to find Sokka seated cross legged at the floor table, munching on a plate of snacks he must have retrieved while Zuko was busy. He stretched and gave Zuko a smirk as he looked him up and down.</p><p> </p><p>“Well, don't you look good enough to eat.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko levelled him with an unimpressed glare. “Don't you dare, I only just got clean.” He warmed in spite of himself though, and strode over to steal a couple of orange slices from Sokka's breakfast plate.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed. “Fine, fine, I know we have important official business to do today so I will be good, I promise.” His words were sweet but his thoughts were <em>not</em>, and Zuko couldn't suppress a shiver as Sokka's want started to ebb into his own mind.</p><p> </p><p>“You're a hazard.” He hooked Sokka's chin with two fingers and tilted his face up to gently kiss him. The warrior met him willingly and fisted a hand in Zuko's robe to try and pull him down, but Zuko resisted the tug and pulled back with a raised eyebrow. He rolled his eyes at Sokka's pout, and nudged his nose with his own. “You will survive for a few hours to get through this event, then we will be free for the night.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sighed with grandeur. “<em>Fine</em>. Though I want it on record that I believe you are a cruel and unyielding lover that obviously hates me.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko snorted. “Yes, <em>clearly</em>.” He let affection flood through the bond, enjoying the way Sokka's eyes softened as he felt it wrap around him. The warrior's arms shot out and Zuko was unceremoniously dragged down onto Sokka's lap, laughing as his face was instantly peppered with kisses. “Okay, <em>okay</em>, I may have brought that on myself.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko revelled in the weight and warmth of Sokka beneath him as the warrior blew out a breath and rested his head over Zuko's shoulder. After a moment, he quietly spoke. “I never thought I could have this, you know? Not really.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko did know. He had felt it all when he fell into Sokka's past, the heartache and desperate loneliness. He said nothing in response, allowing the space for Sokka's jumbled thoughts to coalesce.</p><p> </p><p>“I talked to Suki plenty over the years, but I never asked about you. I was terrified to find out if you had wed someone. It wouldn't be shocking, considering your station, and I fully expected you to have an arranged marriage at some point.” Sokka sighed and leaned into him more fully, chin digging in slightly on Zuko's shoulder. “Some days, I hoped you had. Then I could attempt to lock that part of me away forever, but I don't think it would have worked.” He turned to rest his forehead against Zuko's temple. “Now I just wish I hadn't waited so long. My cowardice had a cost.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko frowned. “I wouldn't call you a coward.” Sokka grumbled something to argue but Zuko continued. “You did what you thought was right. And maybe it was. Maybe this was how it was supposed to happen.” He shrugged, loosening Sokka's hold on him and standing, before offering his hands and pulling him up as well. “As for me, I had plenty of people attempting to win my favour, but even the ones I took to my bed were never going to stay there. I never wanted anyone to get that close. Not until you.” Zuko smiled as Sokka pinked a bit. “So maybe I always knew. That I was meant for someone else.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka broke into a soft smile, and Zuko couldn't help but lean up to kiss him on the cheek before giving him a shove. “Go on, you can be frustratingly melancholy later. Right now you need to go get cleaned up and dressed for tonight.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned. “Is this your not so subtle way of kicking me out so you can primp in peace?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko wanted to deny it but Sokka would be able to tell the lie instantly. “Yes.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed, closing the distance between them to speak with a hairsbreadth between their lips. “One more kiss for the road?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko raised an eyebrow. “Well. I wouldn't want to be considered <em>cruel</em> and <em>unyielding</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned and pulled him closer.</p><p> </p><p>One kiss turned into two, turned into a dozen. And look, if Zuko wanted to sacrifice ten minutes to make out, who was going to stop him?</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Zuko felt a bit odd in Water Tribe blues. It was such a flip from his regular colour palette that he honestly couldn't tell if it suited him or not.</p><p> </p><p>He had done away with the mantle he normally wore, instead allowing the cloth and silk to drape from his natural shoulders, tied in at his waist with a deep navy sash embroidered with gold. His tailors had gone all out, apparently. Every bit of his attire <em>felt</em> expensive, and fit perfectly, and Zuko was beginning to suspect that Azir may have had an influence on the fabrics chosen.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko studied himself in the mirror, shifting side to side so he could see the entirety. He sighed, feeling a bit self conscious being so far out of his comfort zone. Eventually he put his hands on his hips and steeled himself. The feast wasn't even <em>about</em> him, it didn't matter what he looked like. All things considered, he was simply an honoured guest.</p><p> </p><p>He glanced at his side table, where the gold flame hairpiece sat, considering for a moment. It might be a bit odd for the Firelord to appear at a public event without it, but Zuko wanted to enjoy himself tonight, and the pin always pulled too taut after a while. He left it where it was, pulling his hair into a long braid instead, adding a few gold clasps to keep it as he went.</p><p> </p><p>Finally finished, he made his way out of his room in search of everyone else.</p><p> </p><p>Which turned out to be much more difficult than he thought. Both Izumi and Sokka's rooms were empty, and he assumed they had gotten ready much faster than him, but he knew Izumi wouldn't leave without him.</p><p> </p><p>If he thought the palace was busy the day before, it was positively buzzing now. Servants and guards carried all manner of food outside to the grounds, and everything that passed him smelled amazing. He debated just following them out and searching for his family later, but he was determined not to lose people in his own <em>house</em>.</p><p> </p><p>He did eventually find Suki, giving out orders to a few guards. She was dressed in some light blues that contrasted beautifully against her red hair. When she spotted him, she gave him a wave to flag him down.</p><p> </p><p>She flicked her gaze over him as walked over. “Well, don't you look like a certain someone's fantasy come to life.” She grinned as he flushed bright red. “What's up bossman?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko rubbed a hand down the back of his neck as it heated. “Actually, I'm trying to find Sokka and Izumi, have you seen them recently?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, I saw them come through about twenty minutes ago, not sure where they went though.” She shrugged. “Izzie is well protected with him, if that's what you are worried about.”</p><p> </p><p>“No, no, that's- yes I know she would be. I just wanted to head down together, but I will keep looking.” He made to leave her in peace but she caught his arm.</p><p> </p><p>She kept her face casual, but spoke lowly to keep from being overheard. “You know, you could just ask him right? It doesn't have a distance limit.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko stared at her uncomprehendingly for a moment, before he abruptly realized that he was being impossibly stupid. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he purposefully directed his thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Where are you?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The reply came instantly with a tinge of curiosity.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>In the gardens, by the turtleducks... everything alright?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed heavily, mostly in relief, but some embarrassment crept in.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Yes, I'm fine. I will meet you there in a minute.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Suki looked thoroughly amused as he met her gaze. “Found him?”</p><p> </p><p>“Shush. I'm... new to this.” He scrubbed a hand down his face before looking away for a moment as he had a thought. “You said distance doesn't matter... do you ever speak to her?”</p><p> </p><p>When he glanced back up his sentinel's eyes had turned to steel. She didn't respond, but she crossed her arms over her chest in a gesture the screamed defensive.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko paused for a moment, trying to find the right words to get his point across. “I don't want to shove my nose where it doesn't belong, Suki, and I certainly cannot speak for someone I've never met, but I will say that there is nothing quite as lonely as being someone in a seat of power. If you could have someone that you could trust beyond a shadow of a doubt, that is worth far more than being some high ranking dignitary.”</p><p> </p><p>She watched him carefully, and seemed to glance around quickly to make sure no one was eavesdropping.</p><p> </p><p>When a reply didn't seem to be coming, Zuko continued. “You have been my friend for years, Suki, guarded me through all manner of insanity, and I think you have more than earned some happiness. I would miss you terribly, but I would never be angry if you chose to leave this post and return to the North.” Her gaze was still guarded when he reached out to give her arm a quick squeeze. “Just... think about it?”</p><p> </p><p>He once again turned to leave, but just before he stepped away she caught his sleeve. “Thank you, Zuko.” Her words were quiet, and cracked a bit at the end, but he just nodded to her and said nothing more.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>As Zuko passed the gateway to the gardens, he could hear the low tones of Sokka's voice from a distance, punctuated with laughter.</p><p> </p><p>He paused as he rounded a corner, taking in the strange scene.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi was sitting cross legged on a bench, reclined comfortably in her deep navy robes, as Sokka stood behind her, pulling one long strip of her hair into a small, complex braid. The duo looked up as he walked over, and Izumi lifted a hand to wave at him.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka froze entirely as he set his eyes on Zuko. A slow, soft smile spread across his face, and warmth flooded the bond between them for a moment before intention crawled into his thoughts as well.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You look incredible.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>It was odd, because he could see the image of himself in his mind's eye from Sokka's point of view, and it wasn't at all how he thought he looked in the mirror. He didn't bother arguing though, knowing full well Sokka wouldn't allow him to. Instead he met the warrior's bright gaze head on.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>As do you. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was wearing something similar to the formal attire he had first arrived in, but this had less layers, and was several shades darker, nearly black. It was accented with silver linings and clasps, which set off his eyes spectacularly.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko broke his stare to look at his niece, who was studying him curiously. He quirked an eyebrow at her and cocked his head in question.</p><p> </p><p>She shrugged and signed, <em>“I don't think I've ever seen you look like this. Very pretty.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled above her. “Agreed.”</p><p> </p><p>He returned to his earlier task, quickly finishing the thin braid, and reaching into his pocket to pull out a small, ornate, silver bead. Zuko watched as he threaded it through the last couple of strands until it was secure.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smirked, but he was radiating happiness like sunlight. “You're one of mine now, Princess! No take backs.” He smacked a noisy kiss to the top of her head and laughed when she batted him away in annoyance.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi pinked in embarrassment, but Zuko could see that she was pleased as she ran her fingers down the length of the thin braid, bringing the bead up to her eye level to inspect it. He couldn't quite see the design from this faraway, but whatever it was had her eyes widening for a moment before she turned to look at Sokka.</p><p> </p><p>He winked at her. “It seemed fitting.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko walked closer so he could see, and she held it up for him to inspect. Etched delicately in the metal, was the unmistakable visage of a dragon, wrapped around to touch its own tail. It shimmered in the light, and almost seemed to move with the motion.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi seemed entirely captivated by it, turning it back and forth to watch the illusion before letting it rest against her chest and bring her hands up once more to sign. <em>“It's beautiful, thank you.” </em>She stood gracefully and stretched, eyeing them both. <em>“Ready to go?”</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled and offered his elbow to her, and she laughed and took it, snagging a hand out to hook one of Sokka's as well.</p><p> </p><p>The trio made their way out of the gardens, and found Suki before heading out to the already crowded grounds.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In a now empty bedchamber, a large hawk landed gracefully on a perch, next to another near identical bird. Strapped to it's leg was a small note.</p><p> </p><p>To no one, it read:</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I've almost caught them. The last one left. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Be careful brother, they seem too close to home for my liking. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>-A.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In the depths of the catacombs beneath the palace, Calianna slipped on a dark mask, adorned with black feathers, and stepped near-silently ever upwards.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*</p><p>... Well?</p><p>¯\_(ツ)_/¯</p><p> </p><p>Love you guys! Thank you for being so awesome &lt;3&lt;3&lt;3</p><p> </p><p>                                                                                                           *</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Of Dancers and Dreamers</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>There sheeee gooooesss, there she goooess agaaaiiiinnn. </p><p>Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p>They strode down the palace steps into the foregrounds, and were met with a sizable crowd already milling about.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko was awestuck to see the revealed decoration. Lanterns of all colours were hung on strands between the terraces, giving a multichromatic glow over the entire space as the sun began to set. Long tables were set out and covered in neat cloth and place settings, and a band had already begun to play to a few early birds on the dance floor.</p><p> </p><p>They passed many familiar faces as they pushed through to the head table where the council was beginning to congregate, and many stopped to bow and offer respect to both Zuko and Sokka as they walked.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko tried not to be amused by Sokka's discomfort at the formality, but it was difficult.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You have watched me handle this daily, Sokka. They are just being polite.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The warrior glanced at him over Izumi's head.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I know. It just makes me feel squirrely when they do it. I am, by all accounts, a nobody. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sent him a sharp look in response.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You are Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, personal guard of Chief Yue of the North, and Ambassador in the Fire Nation. You are a decorated soldier and keeper of the peace known through all nations, and a fabled Protector of Tui. You are not nobody.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka heated a bit at the admiration coming from Zuko, and he could feel the warrior growing a bit embarrassed so he changed tactics.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You are also, technically, consort of the current reigning Firelord, if you wanted to add that accomplishment to the list.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka snorted and sent Zuko an incredulous look as they took their seats at the head table.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Ah yes, there is that. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He winked at Zuko with a small smile, before turning to strike up a conversation with Tai, who was seated on his other side. Zuko took his standard position on the small throne in the middle, with Izumi seated to his right, and Suki beside her. Sokka sat to his left, and the other council members extended in both directions from them.</p><p> </p><p>As the large space continued to fill, Zuko couldn't help but notice the tension slowly building in his young niece. Her shoulders were set tightly as she surveyed the roaming guests, and one hand nervously played along the braid Sokka had given her. Crowds were never her thing to begin with, but he had hoped she would find some comfort in this event with it at least taking place outdoors.</p><p> </p><p>He nudged her gently with his elbow to get her attention. “Are you alright?”</p><p> </p><p>She blinked up at him and nodded, taking a deep breath. <em>“It's just... a lot. I will be okay.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Zuko poured them both some tea from the pot set in front of him, and handed a cup to her, speaking quietly. “You don't have to stay. I'm sure Sokka won't be offended if it's too much.”</p><p> </p><p>She shook her head and gave him a small smile, glancing over at where the warrior was chatting. <em>“I promised him a dance, I can do that much.”</em></p><p> </p><p>He reached down to give her hand a squeeze before turning his attention to Tai, who stood and walked to the front of their table and clapped his hands together to quiet the audience.</p><p> </p><p>“Well now, this is an extraordinary turn out! I must say, I am so very pleased to see you all here.” Zuko smiled at Tai's obvious happiness, and the elderly councilman still had quite a way of asserting himself in the space. “Some of you may know, I spent some time in my youth in the Southern Water Tribe, and while I enjoyed many aspects of the culture, there was nothing that compared to the first time I took part in this particular feast. While tonight has more of a Fire Nation flair to it, I hope it resonates well to better understand other cultures. It is also a perfect opportunity to properly welcome our newest councilman, Ambassador Sokka, who has proven to be an incredible asset since he first arrived, as I'm sure many of you have heard through the rumour mill.”</p><p> </p><p>A smattering of laughter was heard, and Zuko looked over at Sokka, who rolled his eyes but smiled even as his cheeks started to redden.</p><p> </p><p>Tai continued on. “And I will say, for us on the council, and certainly many of you who have managed to meet him of your own accord, he is an endlessly kind and patient person, with one notable exception. Though, for those of us present it was certainly well deserved.” He turned from the crowd to look at Sokka. “So I hope he will indulge me for a moment, and speak a few words about this particular event before we begin.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka scrubbed a hand down the back of his neck, but stood and rounded the table, where he was met with raucous applause.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko smiled and allowed his affection and calm to soothe Sokka's nervousness at being singled out.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Told you. Not a nobody.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka glanced his way and sent him a quick private smile, before turning his attention to the audience. “I apologize, I am not much for public speaking, contrary to popular belief. And I will admit that when Tai first broached the idea of throwing this feast, I nearly said no, simply because it seemed so strange to celebrate by own culture in another nation entirely.”</p><p> </p><p>All eyes were on him, and the room was near silent as the audience sat at attention. Zuko always thought it was amazing to watch Sokka like this. It was often the same in council meetings, that he could be so quiet and gentle with his words, but command the space entirely.</p><p> </p><p>His pride surged to the surface as Sokka continued. “But I think I was a bit foolish. Looking out at you now, it's incredible to see people of all nations and backgrounds willing to participate in this. It is a testament to how far we've all come past the damage of our predecessors, and it's nice to see that even hundred year old wounds can still heal, thanks in no small part to Lord Zuko's tireless efforts, as well as everyone here.”</p><p> </p><p>A few cheers called out, and Sokka laughed before gesturing out at the arranged food and tables. “As for this, we simply call it the Hunter's Moon Feast. Which is exactly what it sounds like, but there is more meaning behind it.” He gestured skyward, where the moon sat heavy in the sky above them. “It only happens on blue moons, which for my people is usually during the worst, most blizzard like conditions in the pole. We take parties out to hunt enough food for the entire village, to care for our families, and celebrate through hardship. It has changed over the years somewhat, but the basis remains the same.”</p><p> </p><p>He looked over to Zuko and met his gaze for a moment, and he felt the deep rooted affection warm him from the inside out. “We use this feast to provide for the ones we love, and to present them with something they need. In most cases, a meal, but not always. Sometimes it is a gift, or a promise, or simple companionship. Whatever way you can assist them, and bring them happiness. So I hope you can all take from this a way to honour your own family and friends.”</p><p> </p><p>He made a show of putting his hands on his hips. “That being said, this is in fact a <em>feast</em>, and I'm <em>starving</em>. So let's get started.” The crowd whooped and hollered as Sokka made to return to his seat. Food began to appear by the platter, carried in by kitchen staff to fill all available table spaces, and everyone immediately started digging in.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka sat back down with a sigh beside him, and Zuko glanced outwards before reaching a hand down to entwine it with one of his. “Well said. I wish I had known about the gift giving though, is there anything you want?”</p><p> </p><p>The warrior gave his hand a squeeze and met his gaze with amusement. “I think you already know the answer to that.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko laughed and rolled his eyes. “I'm not a very good gift if you already have me, I don't think that's how it works.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka scoffed in mock offence. “Don't lecture me on how this works, it's my feast! If I say you can re-gift yourself, then that is what you can do.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko quirked an eyebrow, and smirked at him with just a hint of dare.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Well, in that case.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's eyes widened as he caught what Zuko was about to do a second too late, as he reached a hand out to turn the warrior's face to his own and pull him into a lingering kiss.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko's mind went star bright for a moment as Sokka's turbulent thoughts suddenly pinpointed.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Zuko? There are people- are you sure you, I mean-</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko pulled back for a moment and had to stop himself from laughing at an absolutely flustered Sokka. “I'm sure. My turn to stake a claim, so fuck it.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka smiled brilliantly and tilted his face upwards to catch Zuko's lips quickly once more. “As you wish.”</p><p> </p><p>They were interrupted by Suki snickering delightedly, and when Zuko turned to face her she nodded out to where Azir and his family were seated. His wife, Celia, was slapping him repeatedly on the arm and pointing in their direction, and when Zuko met her wide eyed gaze, she beamed at him and waved.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka chuckled and waved back, while murmuring to Zuko. “Well, if I know her, anyone who didn't already know will surely find out in the next hour, so I think your plan worked.”</p><p> </p><p>He couldn't help but feel a bit pleased. “Good. I've been debating all night how I could subvert people trying to hit on you, but this works just as well.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki took a swig of ale and laughed. “Don't worry, once they see this weirdo hit the dance floor, the luster will come right off.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka gasped indignantly. “<em>Excuse</em> you. I've got moves! I can cut a rug with the best of them, Suki.”</p><p> </p><p>She grabbed a drumstick off a nearby platter and took a bite out of it before using it to point at Sokka. “I will remind you that Izumi is under my protection, so I expect her returned to me unharmed, with no broken toes, or your ass is mine.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi smiled and turned to sign at Sokka. <em>“Don't worry, I've gotten faster at dodging.”</em></p><p> </p><p>The warrior sighed and began piling his plate in resignation. “The lack of faith in me is astounding.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko patted him encouragingly on the shoulder, before following suit.</p><p> </p><p>The food <em>was</em> incredible. Every platter that was passed down had something new on it, and it was almost to the level of the open market for variety. All manner of meats and fish, and different roasted vegetables filled the open air with spices that had everyone's mouths watering.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was in heaven.</p><p> </p><p>Zuko already knew that the warrior was easily plied with food, but experiencing the excitement and pleasure secondhand through him was entertaining to say the least. He himself was thoroughly enjoying the meal, but Sokka had packed in nearly three times the amount he had before he leaned back and groaned happily in his chair. Zuko quirked an eyebrow, amused. “Good?”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, the <em>best</em>.” He cracked an eye open to look at Zuko. “Not quite authentic Watertribe, but I am definitely not complaining, <em>spirits</em>.” He reached over to pour more tea for Tai, who was quietly making his way through his own meal. “You, sir, deserve the biggest thank you I can offer. Sincerely.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai chuckled and accepted the cup. “You are very welcome. Although I can't say it was completely selfless on my end, as I also very much wanted to experience this again. It was such a long time ago, now.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko watched as Sokka leaned his head on his hand for a moment. “When we are less busy you will have to tell me more about your time in the pole, we still haven't had the chance.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai nodded. “Anytime you like, I'm afraid I am a rather boring old man now, so my door is always open.”</p><p> </p><p>He could feel Sokka's contempt for the self depreciation, as well as a spike in curiosity as the warrior straightened and squared up slightly to look at Tai directly. “I have not yet met anyone that was truly boring, Tai, I doubt very much you would be the first. Spirits know Iroh threw me for a loop more than a few times, and you are many years his senior, I'm sure you have stories to tell.”</p><p> </p><p>Tai didn't respond for a long moment, looking down into into the cup in his hands with a gentle smile. “I know I have told you this before, but you are very much like your ancestors. It is quite a comfort, to know they live on in you.”</p><p> </p><p>Sokka's pang of surprise had just a tinge of grief attached, and Zuko reached down to take his hand once more as Tai continued.</p><p> </p><p>“As I said, my door is always open, but it looks as though the dancing is about to begin, so I believe your evening is already spoken for.” It was an obvious dismissal, but true. People were starting to abandon the tables and mill about while making a slow migration towards where the band had started to play. Tai pushed back in his chair to stand, but before he left to mingle he reached down to squeeze Sokka's shoulder. “Something like this happening in the Fire Nation would've been a fever dream even thirty years ago, let alone in my time. I will never take this for granted, so thank you Sokka, for allowing me to orchestrate it.”</p><p> </p><p>He left them to their devices, and made his way down to some of the other council members family. Zuko could see Alina come up to speak with him, with someone he assumed must be her cousin, Briala.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka continued to watch him for a moment, but leaned towards Zuko to speak. “Can you give him a raise? I feel like he needs to be awarded in some way.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed. “I actually tried that, years ago. He threw a book at me and thoroughly explained that if I ever attempted that again he would set his hair on fire. I have never wanted to test his resolve, so...” He shrugged and leaned back in his chair with a laugh.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka grinned. “Plucky old man. Reminds me of Iroh.” He stood and stretched with a groan, before placing his hands on his hips and leaning over Zuko to Izumi. “Ready to go, Princess?”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi blew out a breath and looked skywards before pushing back in her own chair and standing. Sokka bowed deeply and made a show of offering his hand to her, and she responded by giving him a shove and nearly knocking him over.</p><p> </p><p>“Uncalled for! Maybe I should have gotten you into wrestling instead of staff work.” He steadied himself and laughed as she extended her elbow to him instead. He threaded his own through hers and allowed himself to be escorted to the dance floor.</p><p> </p><p>Suki shoved herself over into Izumi's vacant seat. “Tell you what bossman, this shindig seems to be a rousing success.”</p><p> </p><p>He leaned back in his chair and relaxed as the party continued around him. “I'm glad. It seems a bit stupid, in retrospect, that we haven't done something like this before. Every nation has different holidays and festivities, and we are home to people of all backgrounds.” Even now, he could see the different coloured formal wear shifting on the dance floor. There was an abundance of blue, but interspersed was plenty of red, and gold, and green. The tempo picked up, and they began to blur faster, turning the lantern lit space into a kaleidoscope of sorts.</p><p> </p><p>Suki sighed and leaned her head on her hand. “Well, this is certainly a step in the right direction. Spirits know Sokka has been to every corner of the world at this point, I'm sure he could recommend some future festivals, even if they aren't quite to this level of grandeur.” She snorted and pointed out into the crowd. “<em>Then again</em>...”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko followed her gaze, and couldn't hold back a snicker as he found the wayward pair. Izumi was doing her best to follow the simple steps of the dance, whereas Sokka was just awkwardly throwing his arms to the beat of the music like an uncoordinated turkey. “Sweet <em>Agni</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Suki continued to laugh. “Oh, I missed this.”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko couldn't seem to look away. He felt like he was witnessing a crime. “I don't understand how he could be that <em>bad</em>. He is such a brilliant fighter with so many weapons, it is not dissimilar.”</p><p> </p><p>“He had to be terrible at something. And Sokka trained very hard to master everything he could, but dancing was never on the list of priorities. Besides which, I think he has fun like this.” It certainly seemed that way. And even Izumi was smiling, though she also looked mildly horrified at the display.</p><p> </p><p>As the song drew to a close, the gathered dancers all bowed to their respective partners, and the pair began to head off the floor to come back up to them. Zuko couldn't help the way he filled with warmth at the sight of Izumi sporting a huge grin, with an arm wrapped loosely around Sokka's waist. He gave her a tight squeeze, before releasing her to head up the steps ahead of him.</p><p> </p><p>Suki stood as they rounded the table to them, cocking her head to study Izumi. “Got your fill for the night?”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi smiled and nodded, gathering a couple items she left on the table. Before she left, she turned to look at Zuko with an unreadable expression. After a moment, she reached over to wrap her slim arms around his waist, and he easily returned the embrace despite his surprise. She pulled back and kissed his cheek, before righting herself and signing a quick, <em>“love you.”</em></p><p> </p><p>He reached a hand out to brush her hair back from her face. “Love you too. Get some rest?”</p><p> </p><p>She nodded, before turning back to Suki, and allowing the sentinel to escort her back up to the palace.</p><p> </p><p>He watched them leave as they disappeared into the dark, before Sokka cleared his throat pointedly beside him. When he turned to look, the warrior flashed him a cheeky grin, before suddenly bowing deeply, and offering Zuko his hand.</p><p> </p><p>“Firelord Zuko, would you do me the honour of joining me in a dance?”</p><p> </p><p>Zuko instantly flushed crimson, and he could feel a few curious eyes on the pair of them as he narrowly resisted gaping like a fish.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I don't know what part of your display with Izumi you think sold me on your talents, but I like my feet where they are currently.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sokka tilted his chin up in an obvious pout.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Please? It's a slow song, I promise to be careful.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Zuko sighed and rolled his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Fine. One dance. And I reserve the right to abandon you at any point.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He reached out to accept Sokka's hand, and was unceremoniously pulled straight out of his seat and into the broad chest.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka laughed and rumbled happily into his ear. “Deal.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The noise of the party dulled with distance as Suki escorted Izumi back to her quarters. The young princess looked exhausted, and she couldn't help but feel a bit proud of her for accepting Sokka's invite to the event, regardless of her dislike for social gatherings.</p><p> </p><p>She had thought they would make great friends when news came that Sokka was returning, and she was pleased to find she was right.</p><p> </p><p>Suki realized she had zoned out for a moment when Izumi's hand lightly touched her elbow, and looked up to see that they were standing at the door to Zuko's wing. “Did you have fun?”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi nodded, dropping her hand and glancing down the darkened corridor. She turned her gaze back up to Suki, giving her an oddly hollow smile. <em>“Thank you.”</em></p><p> </p><p>Suki frowned for a moment. Maybe it really had been too much. She reached out to give her shoulder a squeeze. “Get some rest, princess. I will stay close by, so come find me if you need anything.”</p><p> </p><p>Izumi nodded once more, before stepping quietly down the hallway to her own quarters. Suki listened to hear the click of the latch, then went to head towards the main hall.</p><p> </p><p>She paused for a moment at one of the outcropped balconies, stepping out once more into the cool night air.</p><p> </p><p>Suki couldn't help but remember Zuko's words from earlier in the evening.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Do you ever speak to her?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>No. Never.</p><p> </p><p>Because a beautiful, <em>powerful,</em> woman had looked at all the shattered parts of her and claimed them as her own.</p><p> </p><p>A <em>wolf</em> had very gently cradled her heart in it's teeth and promised to look after it for eternity.</p><p> </p><p>She could not have that. She could not have <em>her</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Suki's chest ached, and she toyed with her fingers for a moment before looking up at the eerily bright, night sky. The moon hung heavy above her, and she wondered if the frozen north was alive with celebration as well.</p><p> </p><p>She took a breath. Another. Deep and purposeful, and she couldn't seem to stop her body from tensing for a moment before she carefully lowered the barriers, seeking out the ever present link.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Tui looks beautiful tonight.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>A simple statement. Testing the waters. A rush of calm filled Suki, and she knew that she was heard as she felt a separate presence in her own mind. Equal parts curious and cautious.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Yes, she does.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>A careful reply, but Suki sucked in a sharp breath as Yue's gentle tones echoed in her head. Suki had all the power in this situation, she always had. Because Yue would never try and push her, even now.</p><p> </p><p>Suki felt a rush of nerves, and smiled to no one but herself.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I'm sure you do as well.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Amusement sparked at the edges of the link between them, as Yue laughed, pleased.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I'm sure to some, but unfortunately for me I am still Chief, so I get to be dressed in as many ceremonial garments as they can strap to me, currently. They are lovely to look at, but I'm beginning to feel like a walking closet. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>It was more words than they had spoken in years, and Suki clung to it like a cliff edge. It shouldn't be like this, she shouldn't still <em>feel</em> like this. She had always thought people that said 'distance makes the heart grow stronger' were fools, but the reality was that it was only half of the equation.</p><p> </p><p>Love was an open wound on her heart, and distance had only torn it wider.</p><p> </p><p>She took a deep breath, and held her head in her hands, glad that Yue couldn't see her in this state.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I'm sure it isn't that bad.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>An image came then, of Yue standing at her bedside mirror, gesturing to herself in an absurd amount of regalia. It was indeed beautiful, with white furs and blue wools interwoven in incredible patterns, as well as an intricate hair piece that rested on her forehead and followed her braids down the sides of her face.</p><p> </p><p>Suki couldn't help but smile at the exasperation painting Yue's features.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Nevermind, that does seem a bit much, doesn't it.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Yue's tranquility seeped into her mind and eased her earlier apprehension.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You wouldn't believe the amount of noise that this makes as I walk, I can't move a muscle unnoticed.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Suki sighed and tapped a nail anxiously against the stone.</p><p> </p><p>She had to say it. She wasn't a cowardly thing that hid in the dark, but she had been acting like one for years.</p><p> </p><p>She had to say it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Yue...I-</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The hairs on the back Suki's neck stood up for a split second in warning, and she reached for a knife as she spun around, but a second too late, as something slammed into the side of her head and she crumpled to the ground.</p><p> </p><p>White hot pain fired across her face from her throbbing temple, and she knew she was about to pass out as blackness filled the edges of her vision.</p><p> </p><p>Yue was screaming in her head, asking... what was she asking?</p><p> </p><p><em>Suki?! Suki! Let me in! </em> <em> <b>Suki</b> </em> <em>!</em></p><p> </p><p>Suki heard quiet footsteps leading away from her and groaned and as she tried to turn onto her stomach unsuccessfully.</p><p> </p><p>Yue's desperate cries were getting louder and louder, pleading through the static.</p><p> </p><p>Out loud, she slurred. “Anything you want.”</p><p> </p><p>The world faded to black around her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>~~</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Depending on which path you took, it may have started with Princess Izumi.</p><p> </p><p>She was never good with words. Not even when she used to speak out loud.</p><p> </p><p>People thought that it was because she couldn't find her voice, but it was the opposite. There was so much held behind clenched teeth that every time she tried to let her words loose, they flew in all directions, all conversations happening at once.</p><p> </p><p>People said she never made sense.</p><p> </p><p>She wanted to scream,<em> I did once, and no one listened.</em></p><p> </p><p>As a child her dreams were filled with people and places she had never met or seen. Battles and wars she knew had happened before, and some she knew had not happened yet.</p><p> </p><p>It took her years to understand what was happening, and that it was not how others experienced sleep. That normal people didn't close their eyes at night, and quietly fall through time and space.</p><p> </p><p>It was not always terrible. Often she would simply find herself in open spaces, completely uninhabited. She loved those best, in the quiet of dream space.</p><p> </p><p>But, sometimes she dreamt of <em>fire</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Those nights she would wake with tears falling hot down her cheek, and cold dread hollowing her stomach. She would leap from her bed to run to her father's room, and he was always quick to wake and draw her up into his lap. A hand would stroke down her shaking back as she clawed and cried into his chest. He would always say,<em> “It's okay Izzie, it's okay it's just a night terror, it's not real.”</em></p><p> </p><p>And she wanted to scream, <em>Not terrors, not terrors. It was truth. It was </em>you.<em> It was battleships sinking beneath the waves with you inside.</em></p><p> </p><p>All she could force from her mouth was a stuttered, broken, <em>“D-dad.”</em></p><p> </p><p>And so she knew, when the fall came and leaves blew through the courtyard and swirled around her feet.</p><p> </p><p>And she knew, when her father and grandfather sat arguing about a risky mission in the common study.</p><p> </p><p>And she knew, when a ship was readied with all the bells and whistles to set sail north with her father at the helm.</p><p> </p><p>She sobbed and shouted and threw an absolute wreck when he set to leave without her. He kept saying that she was going to be fine. That he would return in a week at most.</p><p> </p><p>And she wanted to scream,<em> liar, you will not return at all, you are made of flame and you will find only death in the ocean. </em></p><p> </p><p>What she said instead was, <em>“D-daddy please, please don't leave me alone.”</em></p><p> </p><p>She remembered his arms around her, strong and tight and final, but only for a moment before he stepped away. To his ship, to his fate.</p><p> </p><p>Ten days later, a soft knock rattled her door, and her grandfather came through. His face was solemn, and tear-streaked.</p><p> </p><p>She never spoke aloud again.</p><p> </p><p>When it started again, it was so much slower, to the point where she barely knew it was happening at all. As if the massive cogs of time were slowly interlocking around her, and she had nowhere to go but forward.</p><p> </p><p>Darkness returned to her dreams when the stranger from the South appeared.</p><p> </p><p>He told her his name was Sokka, but she wasn't sure. She thought to herself, <em>Yes it is that, but also more, that is not everything you are. </em></p><p> </p><p>At night in her sleep she would find herself floating above a frozen plain, snow reflecting the pale moon above, the shape of something in the distance that she could not yet make out. When she woke her arms would be covered in gooseflesh, a memory of frostbite, though she had never experienced it herself.</p><p> </p><p>In the light of day she said nothing, but she watched her Uncle Zuko, who she loved fiercely, as damaged and distrustful as she was.</p><p> </p><p>Birds of a feather.</p><p> </p><p>Dragons of a flame.</p><p> </p><p>She saw the icy cage around his heart begin to thaw, a little bit more every day in the presence of wild one.</p><p> </p><p>Sokka was a surprise to her as well. She had never made friends easily, but his kindness was unending, and he never treated her as anything less than normal. He was one of the few people she had ever met that did not feel draining to be near, and she wanted desperately to keep him.</p><p> </p><p>She watched as he quietly adored her Uncle from a distance, and sometimes she thought that they both needed to be shaken like dusty rugs to get them on the same page.</p><p> </p><p>And she thought,<em> please, please let them have this. I will do anything.</em></p><p> </p><p>And then the shape in her dreams became a <em>wolf</em>.</p><p> </p><p>A massive thing. Black as night, eyes like hurricanes, thundering through an ice palace in a city on high alert.</p><p> </p><p>She saw the approach of flame against the snow, and the curdled sanity of a once revered General as he sought to destroy the spirit of the moon.</p><p> </p><p>A blade, a flash, sinking into the chest of the beast.</p><p> </p><p>A roar, a glint of fangs, tearing into Zhao's throat.</p><p> </p><p>And a woman, screaming in fury as she watched her brother fall lifeless off the cliffs, into the swelling ocean below.</p><p> </p><p>Izumi could see everything in the dreamspace, all memories at once. Understanding clung to her like sap, inescapable.</p><p> </p><p>And so she knew, maybe when she watched the slow rise of the full moon, vaguely tinted with blue.</p><p> </p><p>And she knew, when a quiet thud of a body hitting the floor sounded in the hall.</p><p> </p><p>And she knew, when her door creaked open and a blade slid beneath her chin.</p><p> </p><p>But how could she stop it this time, when she had only ever failed before.</p><p> </p><p>~~</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>😎😎😎</p><p>Thank you so much to my lovely commenters, you guys are the literal best! </p><p>Reminder to come yell at me on tumblr sometime, same username as here. &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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